Mistaken
by xXPlayedByLifeXx
Summary: Tommy tells Jude she's poison, Jude got no label and is through with Tommy. But what now? New and old people keep showing up, some people change. And Jude's right in the middle of it. How, and who, is she going to choose? Give it a shot! *Jommy*
1. Chapter 1

Ok, this is my new story: Mistaken. Or well, it's the beginning. I originally only had the first chapter as a one-shot songfic, but when some of you asked me to write more and continue, I thought why not? So here's the first chapter again ;)

It's set somewhere after Tommy got home from New Brunswick and after he told Jude she's poison. It's the morning after she burned this little box with all the Tommy-things.

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Mistaken - Chapter 1

In the morning Jude went down in the garden. There were still the remains of the box where all "Tommy-Things" she ever had, had burned the day before. Despite everything she said and did in front of Megan, despite all of her anger and hurt about what Tommy said, she still knew that she wasn't over him.

She felt like a fool for believing that Tommy could change so much, only for her. She had confused her dreams with the truth and it hurt damn much to realize that.

_**Rush in  
Way too fast  
Why do I always do it?  
Thinking this might last  
How could I be so stupid?**_

She had been so quick to fall in love with Tommy. Although she should have learned better, she had still believed, that when the press knew and Tommy finally admitted he loved her, everything would be ok. "Fool!" A soft and bitter voice called out inside of her head. Jude shaked her head sadly. She shivered in the cold air, but inside she felt so much colder.

_**But this time  
I'm not OK, no**_

She thought about all the times Tommy had broke her heart, beginning with her not-so-sweet sixteenth birthday, topping with him walking out on their first date and him humiliating her on her 18th birthday, and ending with him giving up on their relationship so easily, telling her once again he wasn't good enough for her, in this cell in New Brunswick. And of course that little "talk" they had recently; him telling her that she was poison. Not exactly what she had expected for the closure she had searched.

_**I need to breathe again  
'Cause I don't want to**_

_**I don't want to make another mistake like you  
And I don't want to hate, but love doesn't get me through  
'Cause I can't be  
Alone again  
No I don't want to make another mistake  
Like you**_

Maybe Megan WAS right after all. Maybe she really needed to finally let go of Tommy and her dreams. What Jude knew for sure, was that she couldn't keep on like she used to. She just couldn't take anymore of this drama, always ending with her being left heartbroken by one and the same guy. Now she had not only lost her heart, but also her best friend, Jamie. She should have known that Tommy was no good for her, as long as he still thought she didn't know him or that he needed to protect her from himself. Everybody had told Jude that Tommy was no good, but Jude always had faith in him and believed his crap about protecting her. Jude laughed bitterly and cynical; it was like Tommy never realized that with breaking things up with her, he hurt her more than anything else he could ever do. Because if he really messed up, like cheating on her or something, then she would maybe be able to let go, to hate him. But this way it was hard, she kind of came to thinking, that hating Tommy was the only way to get over him. She knew that she couldn't just ignore him this time, because she needed to move on, she needed to get over him, she needed to do this for herself. And hating him would be the easiest way to moving on. But that was hard, considering she still cared.

_**Stone cold  
And hurt inside  
Not what I wanted to be  
I don't sleep  
Its kinda hard when you cry  
Yeah that's where you left me**_

Jude went back into the house; she had enough of starring at the same ashes. She passed Sadie, but when her sister asked her what was wrong, she just waved it away and went upstairs in her room, slamming the door shut. She knew that Sadie was just worried and tried to help and inwardly Jude winced at her cold behavior, but she just couldn't deal with everything. She hated herself for being that way. She hated that Tommy seemed to be alright, when she was totally messed up. She hated that she had been so wrong with believing in Tommy, because the Tommy she thought she knew would have never ever said those things to her. That Tommy she knew…

"Well, Tommy always seemed to think that he protects me with hurting me." She thought sarcastically. Maybe he thought that if he kept hurting her, she would have enough of him some day. "Why am I still searching excuses for his behavior? He's an ass, but I still try to understand him. Maybe I'm really stupid for holding on to something that's not there."

But she hoped for the first time he was right. She hoped that she would really have enough of the drama at some point. Because she didn't know how much more of this all she could take, it felt already like it wouldn't be ok again ever.

_**But this time  
It's not alright, no  
I need to find someone  
'Cause I don't want to**_

_**I don't want to make another mistake like you  
And I don't want to hate, but love doesn't get me through  
'Cause I can't be  
Alone again  
No I don't want to make another mistake  
Like you**_

Jude sighed defeated. She just didn't know what to do about Tommy. She believed now finally what everybody else has been telling her, that a real relationship with Tommy wasn't possible. Not meant to be, at least not for her. She had no other option than believing what everybody else said, because there just was no excuse anymore. Even the excuses she made up for him, they sounded ridiculous even just in her thoughts. But she still knew, that she couldn't let go. But she sure as hell didn't ever want to be left alone like that again. She couldn't.

_**Don't wanna be caught in the moment it never comes  
Is it too much to ask  
That real love could find me?  
**__**I won't get stung  
I'll find the one**_

"Maybe Tommy's not the right one for me. But if it's like that, why can't I hate him for everything he's done to me? Why do I still care?" Jude scolded at herself. She was stupid to still believe in Tommy after he said these things. But she couldn't change it. She still loved him.

_**B**__**ut...**_

Jude suddenly grabbed her keys and went outside, started the car and pulled out of her driveway. She had made a decision and had come to a cognizance. Tommy had been a mistake. She had made a mistake in falling in love with him.

_**I don't want to make another mistake like you**_

Jude vowed to herself that she would never ever get into a situation like this again. She would never ever let herself believe in her dreams coming true again. Now she had to choose how to go on, she had already tried being only friends, but that didn't go that well. She had already lost him and that didn't work out for sure.

_**And I don't want to hate, but love doesn't get me through**_

She would try to hate Tommy. She might still love him, but she would at least try to fight it as good as she could. She wouldn't let him in again, no matter what he did. She would fight everything, like she used to in the beginning. Maybe he would leave again if she convinced him that there was no chance to get along. At that point she had to be over him, or at least enough to act like it and to not going to the next club and get wasted.

_**'Cause I can't be  
Alone again  
No I don't want to make another mistake  
Like you**_

While she sped off to the rehearsal place to meet up with Megan she promised herself not to let Tommy back in, at least not without a fight. She wouldn't give in that easily this time.

The first thing she had to do, was finding something to get Tommy to NOT ever fight for her, so she wouldn't even be tempted to give him yet another chance. Then she might get over him. Move on and fall in love with somebody else, less complicated.

Jude sighed, at least she wasn't all alone in this, Megan would help her and Sadie too and she still had SME, they never liked Tommy anyway. And maybe… maybe she could get Jamie back. She missed her best friend and now she knew that a best friend was worth much more than a Tom Quincy.

At least that's what she kept telling her all the way to the rehearsal place.


	2. 2 A New Game

So this is the second chapter. Tell me what you think about it and if I should continue. Because if you don't like it I just won't :)

Some things from what happens in the show will happen too, but maybe at a different time.

So, as always, Reviews are really appreciated. Thanks.

Oh, and sorry if there are some mistakes I haven't seen while reading through it, I'm still trying to improve my english. But it keeps getting better ;)

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Mistaken – Chapter 2

At the rehearsal place…

"No Megan, I don't wanna go out and meet this friend of yours. Look, I know you only want what's best for me, but I can't just move on like that." Jude said annoyed and slightly whiny, while she threw a new ball in the soccer game. They had been playing for quite some time now and Jude was getting frustrated, she knew that Megan only wanted to help, but she didn't want to talk about the whole Tommy thing all the time.

"Don't whine like that, Jude. That guy told you, you were poison for god's sake. You can't just sit around and mope about that jerk. He was never good enough for you, show him that you don't need him." Megan tried to convince Jude, she wanted to prevent at all costs, that Jude would change her mind about Tommy. Megan hated Tommy, because he was no good, and far from good enough for someone like Jude. No one was really worth Jude, but least of all this stupid Tommy-guy.

"I'm trying, I really am. But it's not that easy, because I love-d him. I really do… did. Like I said, me and Tommy, we're through, for good. But that doesn't mean that I'm going for the next blind date. I got other things on my "to-do list". I need to talk to Jamie, I wish we never parted in the first place, but at least now I know that no guy is worth losing my best friend." Megan looked a little bit hurt, but Jude didn't seem to notice and continued. "Then I really have to find a new label, maybe, if Jamie will have me, maybe I'll go to NBR, but whatever happens, I'm gonna make Darius regret and I'm going to make Milo's life hell. That stupid asshole, he's so fake, it even hurts to think about him, I mean, Karma is an **angel** compared to him.

Anyways, somewhere along the way, I'll hopefully get over Tommy and find some new guy. Maybe I'll even get an offer from a label that's somewhere else, not here in Toronto, maybe I can start over, you know. That would maybe be for the best, moving on and everything." Jude trailed off, her mind wandering already. It really would be great to get away, to not have to be in the same city as Tommy. But on the other hand, all her friends were here. Well, she hadn't done much with them recently, she had been too busy with all the Tommy drama.

"Did you know that you're not the only one searching a new label?" Megan asked, seeing that once again, Jude didn't want to listen to her, although she of course knew best. But Megan decided to let it go – for now. It was more important to keep Jude from searching a new record label and maybe leaving town to find one. Jude couldn't just leave her behind. Not now when they had gotten friends, Megan couldn't let Jude do this. After all she was the only sane person in Jude's environment, all her other so-called friends told her to get back together with Quincy. Not very good friends, in Megan opinion.

"What are you talking about?" Jude asked not very curious while the two girls settled on the couch.

"I'm talking about a certain ex-boyfriend of yours. Shay. It was all over the news today, he came back to Toronto to talk to his dearest uncle Darius and it seems like they had a huge fight yesterday, so now Shay says that he's open for any offers from other record labels. Seems like G-Major needs new artists. I'm sure Darius regrets already letting you go." Megan told Jude with a chuckle, it was really unbelievable what had happened with Shay. Some months ago he had had a fight with Darius too, over "creative differences" like the label said later, and now he was seriously leaving G-Major and his almighty uncle.

"Megan, if you're honestly implying that I should go back to Darius and beg for another contract, you're crazy. I won't come crawling back to that wannabe-god. He canceled my tour, he didn't even gave me and my album a chance!"

Megan sighed.

"Jude, I know this sounds harsh, but your album did suck."

"So what? That's not a reason to just dump me like… like… you see? I don't even have words for that kind of behavior." Jude cried upset.

Megan tried to calm Jude down and they talked about some other stuff. Half an hour later Jude left the rehearsal space and went straight home, she was tired and had enough of everything. At home she went to bed after watching a few episodes of Gilmore Girls. There she cried herself to sleep, shedding the tears she fought back so hard during day.

* * *

Earlier at G-Major…

"T, listen. I got no intension on getting Jude back on this label, her album was crap damn it. Besides, I thought that you and her, and I quote you now, weren't "you and her" anymore. What happened to that?" Darius asked annoyed. Tommy had after all just gotten back, and Darius had enough to deal with without his best producer mourning the artist, whose last album sucked. He had to arrange some things for the coming arrival of his last hope, his new artist.

"That has nothing to do with this. Jude's a great singer and you know it, you're making a mistake in letting her go. But hey, maybe she quit and you just don't want to admit it, I mean, Shay's done the same and that was something I never thought from Shay-Shay!" Tommy said upset, he HAD broken up with Jude, and he had done enough for her to never even like him again, but now he had no chance in getting her to forgive him. If she wasn't forced to work with him, she would never talk to him again. Understandable through. He wouldn't want to talk with himself either. He hated himself for getting drunk on his first AFTERNOON back, but what could he do now? He had gotten drunk pretty bad and when Jude came up to him, he just wanted to get rid of her, because he didn't want her to know just how pathetic he was.

"Would you repeat that?" Darius asked with a dangerous calm voice. Tommy, who had been thinking about other things the whole time, got back to reality and realized that he might have gone a little bit too far. Maybe.

"Nothing D. So when do I have to work with these two stupid TV-show guys? Because I guess I just ruined every chance on getting out of this job, right?"

"Very right. You and your new two ARTISTS are scheduled in half an hour. So you got time to put on your camera-smiling-face, because you're gonna be on national TV and I hope for you that you're looking good. You're representing G-Major and I don't like people who give me or my company a bad name." Darius said in a tone that made clear that he was a) pissed and b) done with the conversation.

Tommy nodded, suddenly terrified of his job, he really DIDN'T want to work with the wannabe diva Karma or with the "I-will-never-ever-grow-up" Spied. He didn't understand anyway how Jude had always put up with Spied's crap, that guy was so pathetic and acted like a five-year-old. But when he turned around and headed for the door he stopped in his dead tracks. The person that leaned in the door frame sure as hell wasn't his favorite person. And would never be.

"Shay-Shay, what a surprise. My pleasure to meet you again, never thought I would through. Running back to uncle Darius? Got scared all alone in the big bad world?" Tommy asked taunting. Silently he wondered how long Shay had been standing in that door frame and what exactly he wanted from Darius. Darius was really no fun when he was pissed and from what Tommy had seen, Darius was beyond pissed off by Shay.

"Saint Tommy, I would say nice to see you too, but I don't wanna lie. So I take it, that your little fairytale ended?" There was no doubt in any mind of Tommy or Darius about who Shay was talking or about how long Shay had been eavesdropping. "I'm so sad for you. Really. But you know what's even sadder? That my dear uncle over there lost his two top selling artists in less than a week. But I didn't come here to tell Darius that he's getting old and is making mistakes. I'm actually here to talk to you, lil' old Tommy Q. Unbelievable, I know." Shay muttered the last part, obviously bored. He really didn't want to talk to Darius, but because Tommy had been in this office, he had come and now he would have to listen to Darius' speech – again. The only thing he came for was information, and although he had gotten nearly everything he needed from that nice little chat Tommy and Darius had just had, he still needed the most important piece of information.

"Who do you think you are? You dare to come back here, after what you pulled with the media? I thought you're way too busy with waiting for these offers from other labels to coming here to talk to Tommy." Darius said, stressing the last three words, because he clearly didn't believe that Shay would ever _come just to talk to Tommy_. "You can admit it, you got scared and want back in, right?"

Shay rolled his eyes. That had been so predictable. But nonetheless he smirked widely at Darius.

"No D, I don't want back in. I got already three pretty good offers, but thanks for the concern. No, I really came to talk to Tommy, because what I want to know has indirectly to do with these offers."

"And what would that be? And why in hell should I tell you what you want to know anyways?" Tommy asked surprised and angry too. He was always angry when Shay was anywhere near him, but this time he already wasn't in a good mood BEFORE this arrogant kid had shown up. Tommy hoped for Shays own sake, that he would come to the point real quick, because Tommy had to fight against the urge of punching Shay in his arrogant face. He wanted to punch something, preferably Shay, real bad.

"Well, I just wanted to ask you where Jude is. You know, as her boyfriend you should know that. Oh, sorry, I forgot, you're not her boyfriend anymore. And not her producer either as I just learned. Damn it, are you anything aside from a sell-out? So, do you know where she is or do I have to ask a friend of her?" Shay asked still smirking. He really enjoyed messing with Tommy. He still was angry about how Tommy had behaved when he had dated Jude. And he was still convinced, that in the end, it was Tommy's fault, that Jude and him wasn't together anymore. Jude would have forgiven him, if Tommy hadn't been there, Shay was sure about that.

"You're so full of yourself, you know that right? You'd better watch what you say, because if you don't I'll-" Tommy started to rant while clenching his fists pretty hard.

"Saint Tommy's getting upset? Cute. But I guess that means you don't know where she is, do you? Oh well, I'll just ask somebody else. I mean, someone has to be close to her after all. Although I can understand that it's not you. I mean who would want to have to do anything with a big screw-up like you in the first place. But whatever, it's your crap of a life, not mine. I'm gonna get going, searching my future girlfriend. Don't be afraid, I'm gonna take care of her, Saint Tommy, and I'm not gonna be stupid enough to ever let her go. You know, I learned from the best. So, D, I guess I'll see you around. I'll tell you then about how it feels to be a real star and how it is to be with a label that actually lets me write my own music." With that Shay turned around and left the office, not bothering to look back. He was so done with his uncle. Now he had to find Jude and get back in her good grades. That would be difficult, but he was willing to do anything to get HIS girl back.

* * *

Next day…

Jude was sitting in the rehearsal place, next to Tommy. He was telling her what an idiot he had been and how stupid he was. He was apologizing for being and asshole in New Brunswick and in that club and promised her he never meant what he said. He said he wanted to be with her badly. He told her he loved her more than anything else. And then he kissed her. And then his hands wandered. And then…

Jude woke up.

What the fuck was causing her to wake up? It had been such a good dream, too good to be true. Yeah, indeed. Jude turned and grabbed her pillow, pressed it over her ear unwilling to wake up already. Not when Tommy was only some fantasy-seconds away from her. Not when her fairytale could last a little longer. But Jude couldn't just go back to sleep, because the nerve wrecking knocking at the front door continued. It almost had some kind of rhythm.

Knock-knock-knock-knockknock-knock…

Finally Jude gave up her illusions and stood up. She was determined to yell the shit out of whoever was disturbing her really sweet dreams. She hated waking up in the morning and she wasn't a morning person at all, but in this case she was even more pissed off than usual.

She stomped down the stairs, not bothering to change into something more… presentable than her pajama. Which was mixed out of an old band shirt and one of Tommy's boxers. She didn't even care about her really bad case of bed-hair. Whoever was standing behind this door would have other things on his mind than her appearance, because Jude planned on kicked said one's ass.

Jude threw the door open, ready to get into somebody's face. But when she saw WHO was standing there, she kind of forgot what she wanted in the first place. She wouldn't have expected him to show up on her doorstep again. She even forgot that this someone has got her out of the bed, and that was good, because if she did remember, she would have cursed herself for opening the door without getting herself presentable.

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So who's standing at Jude's door? Tommy, Shay or.. somebody else? ;D And who's gonna be Darius new artist? All in the next chapter...

Please tell me what you think...


	3. 3 Proposals, Offers and Fights

Ok, this is the next chapter, thanks to my bro you can read it *thanks*... I asked him to put it up for me, because I had no internet like usual when I'm on vacation... :D Well, tell me what you think and maybe I'll ask a friend of mine to put up the next chapter before I'm back, because it's nearly finished too...

As always have some mercy with my english (and my mistakes)... lol

Enjoy and review...!

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Chapter 3 Proposals, Offers and Fights

_She wouldn't have expected him to show up on her doorstep again. She even forgot that this someone has got her out of the bed, and that was good, because if she did remember, she would have cursed herself for opening the door without getting herself presentable._

"Hey Shorty." Shay said grinning friendly at Jude, who stood there, mouth agape.

"S-Shay. You're here. At my house. Again?" Jude rambled still a little bit slow with thinking.

Shay just grinned even wider, if that was anyhow possible, and walked in the house, leaving Jude standing at the doorframe behind.

"Nice to know some things never change. Everything's just like I remember it. Just you have changed a little. I really like your new hair."

"Well, I see you're as charming as always. That being when you're not cheating on me and humiliating me on my 16th birthday in front of national TV. But I guess we don't really wanna go there, do we?" Jude asked rhetorically. Her words stung and that was exactly what she had intended.

"That was harsh. Not exactly what I wished for our reunion." Shay tried to lighten the mood, but Jude didn't want to be amused.

"Duh. That was supposed to be harsh, idiot. Save your jokes to yourself and tell me why in hell you're here. If you truly believe in a reunion you're even crazier than I thought. Just for the record, I'd never ever get back together with you ever again!"

"Whoa. Calm down, no reason to throw a little fit. Jude, I apologized, I was stupid, I was crazy, I was whatever you want to call it, but in the first place I was wrong. I do understand if you don't want to get back together with me, although I wish you would, and I respect your decision. I'm here to ask you what I have to do to earn your friendship. Because I'd do anything to have you back in my life." Shay said honestly, never breaking eye-contact to make Jude believe that he meant what he said. Jude was taken aback by what he told her. She hadn't expected him to ask for something like that and to be so… honest. She hesitated with her answer, but knew that she couldn't give any other.

"Ok, I guess we could try being friends." She stressed the word try, hoping that Shay would understand that it wasn't that easy for her. Not after everything that happened after her unsweet sixteenth. "I'll try at least, but I don't know. You really hurt me back then. You were my first boyfriend." Jude paused for a few moments, but when the silence became awkward to her she continued. "So, Shay I know you, why did you come here?" Jude asked, knowing very well that Shay had something else to say. She just knew it.

"You know me too well, Shorty. But you always did, didn't you? And you were always that blunt. I remember how you told me right away that I should write my own stuff instead of hiding behind Big D." Shay grinned slightly at this memory. Jude had been pretty rebellious back then. Then he got his face straight again and continued. "What should I say? You were right. I was wrong, nothing new there. I don't know if you read it in the tabloids, but I broke with G-Major and uncle D. I got now different offers from other labels, who are guaranteeing me creative freedom and I'll finally write my own music. That brings me to the reason I'm here. I was at G-Major to see you and beg for your forgiveness when I heard that D dropped you. Seems like he's getting old, because it was a big mistake dropping you, you know that, right? However, I talked to the labels and they all would love to have you sign a contract. I wanted to ask you if you'd want to choose a label with me together, so we could work together. I'd really like to have you as my producer. I know you're not a big fan of rap, but you could help me with the lyrics and everything. And I would love to be your co-producer too." Shay finished anxiously.

He was obviously excited to work together with Jude and finally doing his own stuff. Jude smiled at his childish joy and she already knew that she wouldn't say "no". How could she, she didn't have another label as excuse and she really missed Shay to some point. She had felt happier and smiled more genuine in the last few minutes when he had been in her house, then in the last 48 hours. And she hadn't thought once about Tommy. Maybe what she had told Megan was really true, she just needed to move on with her life and along the way she would get over Tommy and find someone else. This was her chance to start what she had wished for.

"I'll think about it, 'kay? Now tell me something about you, what happened in the last years, what made you finally see that I was right, as usual?" Jude asked and chuckled lightly, she walked over to the couch and sat down, motioning for Shay to do the same. Shay smiled at her and sat down on the couch next to her.

Shay told about his other two albums, about the fame, the girls and the big parties. He told how he got tired of Eden not long after the whole disaster and how he lost his interest in fame slowly during the last year. He told Jude about the many big and little fights he had had with Darius the whole time and how Darius had never taken him for full. Darius had always just decided how things were going to be and Shay had never had any input at all. That had let to the big fight a month ago and finally to him quitting G-Major a few days ago.

Shay looked pretty firm, angry and at the same time torn while he told about him resigning.

"Shay" Jude said, causing him to look at her. "Do you regret quitting? Because if you do, you can still go back. You know that. I'm not a fan from Darius and he treated you like shit, but after all he's family and you don't seem happy with your choice. That's the most important thing, you know?"

Shay smiled softly, thinking about how typical such words were for Jude. She made clear that she didn't like Darius, that she hated him, that she wanted Shay to stood up to Darius and write his own stuff. But when she saw that he wasn't happy she was taking everything back and trying to advice Shay so he would be happy.

"No, I won't go back. I'm not sad because I dropped out of G-Major. But because of my family. D made clear that he doesn't want me anymore on any family meetings, no matter what's the occasion. The sad thing is, that he's gonna make his words true. He can do it and he will. I've never been without my family, I always had their support. Now it's gonna be different, hopefully for the better, but…" Shay stopped, hoping that Jude would understand what he felt. He didn't want to go back, but he was afraid. It was a place he has never been before.

Jude pulled Shay spontaneously in a friendly comforting hug, sensing his fear and knowing he was torn, although he didn't want to admit it.

"For whatever it's worth, I think you did right. It was the right decision. Your family will come around, if not they are not worth it. And I'll be with you all the way. What friends are for if not helping out in such situations?" Jude asked smiling while she was releasing the surprised Shay. She had doubted Shay's good intentions when he came into her house, but after their talk she was convinced that Shay had really changed – for the better. She respected him for standing up to his uncle and for leaving everything behind. She had laughed about him, because he had his whole career mostly because of his uncle, but if he really wanted to leave that all, it was brave and she admired him for that. She didn't know what she or anybody she knew would have done in his position. He had now an enemy and he would try everything for the first time all on his own.

Shay said "good-bye" a little bit later and thanked Jude for giving him a second chance. Jude retorted smiling that she didn't know exactly why she was stupid enough to do so, but that he better not mess up again.

When he had left Jude went upstairs again in her room, thinking about what had just happened. She had agreed in finding a new label with Shay. That was a great opportunity, because this way she had the choice and wouldn't have to just accept the first offer she'd get. But she was also close to Shay again now, or would be soon, and that was a recipe for disaster judging after the last time they both had begun as friends. On the other hand, Shay seemed to have truly changed.

Out of the blue her cell began to rang and Jude was searching frantically for it. But as usual her room was a mess and her cell was nowhere to be found. It was Sadie calling, judging from the ring tone and Jude knew it had to be important because Sadie wouldn't call her that early if it wasn't. The ringing stopped and Jude sighed. Sadie would be upset, truly upset. Jude kept on searching, but wasn't rushing anymore.

Finally she found her cell and noticed that she had one missed call, yeah, she knew that already, but there was also a new SMS. She read it and had to read it again. It was from Sadie and now Jude definitely knew Sadie would be real mad. She wasn't even blaming her sister this time. Kwest had freaking proposed to her! Jude was really happy for her sister, although she couldn't help but think that it should have been Tommy and her who were now happy for her sister and his best friend. She was even a little tiny bit jealous of what Sadie had. Jude sighed and shook her head at herself and her thoughts.

_I'm a horrible person, now I can't even be happy for my sister. Sadie's deserved to marry Kwest and to be happy. They both are a perfect couple, who am I to be jealous?!_

Suddenly she heard again knocks again the front door. _What's wrong with today?!_ Jude turned around again and went downstairs.

"Is that you again?" She yelled while going down the stairs. She half expected Shay to show up again, making some dumb joke and asking her out for breakfast. Maybe she would even give in this time, she really was hungry.

When Jude opened the door she was shocked for the second time this day. What a hell of a day, two ex-boyfriends showing up unannounced and completely unexpected at her front door and it wasn't even noon yet!

"T-tommy." Jude stuttered, not knowing if she should listen to what he wanted to say or if she should just shut the door and slam it into his pretty face. Instead she settled on only opening the door a little bit, just enough for her to look at him and him seeing her whole head.

Tommy looked angry and frustrated, but not very sorry. And Jude was already getting pissed.

_Bad sign. If he's not here to apologize he should better leave right now, because I don't want to talk to him._

"I was only coming over to warn you because Shay-Shay's in the city and he's out for you. But judging from the grinning Shay who just drove out of that road, he was already here." Tommy said without bothering to say "hello".

"How considering from you. Do you expect me to thank you?" Jude said in a sneering voice, she couldn't believe that Tommy actually had the nerve to show up on her door step after what he had said two days before. And he wasn't even apologizing, no, he was even criticizing her, her of all. Jude was upset and if Tommy didn't realize his own stupidity in the next few minutes she would be damn right furious and she couldn't guarantee for anything then.

"Actually yeah, I did expect you to be thankful. After all he cheated on you and humiliated you in front of national TV on you freaking 16th birthday, just in case you already forgot!" Tommy said now angry too.

"You're such a jackass! He cheated, that's right, but he at least told me what was going on and where I stood with him, HE apologized for being an ass. YOU kissed me that night, and don't act like what you did wasn't even worse! You made me fucking SWEAR that it never happened!" Jude yelled, now not anymore caring who heard her and who didn't. That guy was asking for it.

"So because he apologized you forgive him? What did he tell you? That it had been a mistake? That he changed and knows better NOW? You believed him this bullshi?!"

"So what?" Jude crossed her arms in front of her chest. She wouldn't defend herself, not after what Tommy did. He wouldn't influence her decisions anymore. Who was he anyway to just come back and act like he had a place in her life? "It's not like it's any of your business anymore, Tommy. What did you tell me again? Wait, I got it. You're poison Jude. Stay as far away from me as possible Or something like that. Do you REALLY think you can just walk back into my damn life after you said THAT? You seem to do, so I clearly underestimated your intelligence. You want me to stay away from you and you think if you change your mind, I would still wait around? Well, here's a newsflash for Little Tommy Q: Stay the hell away from me and my life." With that Jude slammed the door shut, not letting Tommy say anything else. She leaned against the door with her back, releasing a breath she had been holding unconsciously. For a split second all Jude wanted was to open the door again, to hug Tommy and to never let go again, to forget everything that happened since Tommy got that stupid call from his brother. Acting like they had never visited his hometown, like he had never given up on them –again, like he hadn't told her to stay away – again.

But that wasn't real, that was illusion. She couldn't act like nothing had happened, nor would Tommy. She had to be strong now in reality and her wishes and hopes had to stay in her dreams.

"Jude, don't be that way! This isn't about us. This is about Shay! You can't trust him, he'll just break your heart again. Believe me, please!" Tommy said loud enough for Jude to hear him through the door.

"I don't believe you Tommy, I won't believe you ever again. What did you expect? That it would be like nothing ever happened? Like the last three years didn't exist? Well, you were wrong, because they did happen. I'm not at G-Major anymore, you and me, well, we're not us any longer. And Shay isn't the through and through bad guy anymore. I talked to him, he really changed. Besides, he never broke my heart, he never really had it. That was all you." Jude said the last sentences quietly, but she knew that Tommy heard the words and her sad tone. She knew that he was hurt by what she was saying, even if he didn't admit it. But she had intended to hurt him. It was her plan, the only plan she had. Besides, Tommy had hurt her enough, he had deserved to be hurting.

Jude could nearly see how Tommy was standing at the other side of the door. Looking at it, not believing what he just heard. This hurt puppy look on his face. She imagined how he raised his arm to knock, but refused. How he opened the mouth to say something, but nothing came out. How he finally walked away to his precious Viper.

_Stay with the plan Jude. You don't need him too apologize, hating him is easier if he doesn't. Don't let your feelings fool you again. There's no going back. You gotta stay with the plan, hurt him, hurt him until he's not coming back. _

A tear dared to escape and Jude felt like her resolve melted away as soon as the Viper had sped away. How could she do this? How could she ever be strong enough for more of THIS?

_Just stay with the plan Jude._

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So Jude's confused, again. Shay's changed and Tommy's an ass... :D but that could change soon again... Tell me what you think about the chapter and the story, I would love to hear some of your ideas as well


	4. 4 New Days, Old Problems

Hey guys... I just came back from vacation in Austria... It was really great... So now there are still two whole weeks till school's starting again... Life sucks. But I got two and a half chapter already tipped, so I'll update the other two soon. Then I'll write first the next ones for Start Over New and for Crossing the Line. Maybe I'll put Chapter 8 of S.O.N. today or tomorrow up.

But now I got a question for you: Over 210 people have read this story, most of them have read all three chapters, some of them have put it on story alert and favs list, but NO ONE had reviewed :((. Why?

Can't you just take a few seconds after this chapter and review? It would totally make my day, so... please...

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Mistaken – Chapter 4 – New days, old problems

Two weeks later…

Jamie was leaving his house in the afternoon, opening his front door while reading a newspaper. He was walking through the front garden when he suddenly felt observed. He looked up and stopped. There was Jude. Leaning against his new car right in front of his house. She had her arms casually crossed in front of her and had this slight smile on her face. Jamie came towards her, stopping a few steps before he reached her.

"Jude." Jamie said unsure, like he was testing how the word felt spoken out loud. They hadn't talked since Jude slapped him after he kissed her after her house party. Jude had finally respected his wish and didn't approached him once since the incident. It had been hard on both. But Jamie had concentrated on NBR, his new label, after Pegan and Blue left the label (or the last one was rather fired) he and Zepplin had thought it was over, but when Spied showed up with his TV-Show everything began to turn around. With the TV-Show NBR got attention and Spied's music was very popular.

"Hey." Jude said. Not knowing how to start nor where. It had taken quite some courage to actually wait for him, she was afraid that he would tell her to stay away. That she would find herself respecting his wish. It would be like loosing him all over again. But Jude also knew that he had to listen to her willingly, she couldn't just force him to listen. She wanted to apologize for letting him down, but she couldn't help how she had felt. She missed him and wanted her best friend back but in the end it was his decision and she knew that now.

"Well, how… how are you?" Jamie stuttered not knowing what to say. The awkwardness between the two felt wrong and he knew it was his fault that they weren't what they had been. It hurt.

Jude laughed shortly, it was so like Jamie to ask such a question. They hadn't talked since forever, last time she had slapped him and all he asked was "how are you?".

"I guess I'm fine. You? How are things going with NBR?"

"Fine. Everything's great. Since Spied dropped out at G-Major and came to us NBR's on it's way to success." Jamie said and it was obvious that he was proud of his work.

"That's so great, I'm really happy for you and Zepplin. I didn't know Spied was now at NBR, I just heard that he dropped out of G-Major after some differences with his producer at G-Major." Jude said with a genuine grin.

Jamie shot her a weird look as if asking: "who are you kidding?" and started grinning knowingly.

"What?" Jude asked curious and bothered that Jamie seemed to know something and she didn't know what. Jamie stopped grinning abruptly and asked:

"You don't know? But… didn't Spied tell you?"

"No, he didn't tell me anything. I haven't talk to him for quite some time. Actually now I think about it I haven't talk to him since before I was fired. First Tommy said this… stuff and then Shay showed up and we searched a new label together and everything." Jude told Jamie while she was drifting away but then she remembered Jamie's look and pushed again: "What?!"

"Well, then you really don't know and I was so stupid to make you curious. But as I know you, now you want to know and nothing can stop you, can it? Ok, here I go, but promise not to kill me, right? Tommy was Spied's producer. He was more or less forced by Darius to work with Spied and Karma on this theme song for their show. Then he kinda flipped out on the second day. I personally think it's because of Shay, I heard he made the day before a appearance at G-Major and there was an argument between him and Tommy, as usual. But I don't know what it was about. Next day Tommy flipped and destroyed a window in the studio. Then Spied resigned. And came to me and Zepplin. Since then I only heard that Tommy's on his way down.

Well, whatever, Spied's music is great and we got performances for him like every week if he wants to." Jamie told Jude nervously. He didn't know how his old friend would react to the Tommy-news, he had heard that the two of them broke up somehow, he didn't know any details, but knowing Jude she was probably devastated.

Jude was shocked when she heard about Tommy **destroying** something in the studio. It wasn't like him, in the studio he used to be so careful with the equipment and pathetic perfect and everything. She couldn't get rid of the thoughts that maybe his behavior was caused by her rejecting him a few days before. It would fit just right with the timing after all.

_But it doesn't matter anyways. Just like I told him, I'm NOT waiting around. __I won't go through the same shit once again. He said it himself, he's the worst thing that could happen to me. Well, he isn't but that doesn't matter anymore either. Now I gotta focus. I gotta get Jamie back._

"That's great for you Jamie. I'm glad Spied came to you, I should have done the same. And I would have if Shay hadn't showed up. Don't give me that look! I know, I know, he's been an ass. But he's changed. Trust me, he did. Besides, I'm never gonna get back together with him. I DO remember what happened quite well. We're just friends. And it's kinda nice to have him around." Jude tried to explain while Jamie shot her disbelieving and doubting looks as soon as she mentioned Shay. He didn't look convinced and was about to say something when Jude cut him out.

"Listen I know you don't like him. Hell, nobody other than me seems to. But I don't wanna talk about this, or him in this case, right now. I came here to get you back. To get my best friend Jamie back. Look, I know you said I should leave you alone and that we couldn't be just friends. But now some time has gone by and I miss you. Don't you…"

Jamie cut Jude off and hugged her. "Yes. I missed you too. Best friends forever, right?"

"Right."

Later…

Jude climbed out of her car and went into a little studio named "Diamond Records". It was even littler than G-Major but Jude didn't really mind. She and Shay had been in New York the last week-end to talk with "Diamond Records"- boss Ethan Gregory and had finally signed a contract after being offered being able to work in Toronto in a little studio of "Diamond Records". Gregory had said as a good-bye that they could come to New York whenever they want to, he would take care of an apartment and everything. They had thanked him and had gone to the Times Square, because Jude wanted to visit a few places in New York before they took their flight back home.

When Jude entered the little entrance hall she was immediately greeted by Shay, who seemed to have already been waiting for her.

"Hey Shorty! I'm glad you're finally coming. I can't work without my producer/artist!" Shay laughed and kissed Jude on both cheeks. Jude had to laugh at that too, at his comment and his behavior. They had begun with these little kisses in Seattle, where they've been for an interesting offer of another label. The manager there had been French or something and so he had greeted everyone except the guys with these little kisses on the cheeks. After Shay and Jude had refused his offer and had been walking through Seattle they had made fun about that French guy and had started to do this greeting-ritual themselves. It had been fun and so none of them both had ever really stopped. It might have seemed strange to her friends or other people but Jude and Shay had to grin every time.

Someone cleared his throat and Shay and Jude turned to the person who made the sound. It was a tall guy with a slimy attitude, he was way too friendly and too agreeing with everything Shay said. When Jude said something he just nodded or something, but whenever Shay spoke he was all "oh, yeah, you're so right…". Jude couldn't stand such people but she restrained from saying something harsh. After all it was the first day and she wouldn't have much to do with that guy anyway.

"This is your studio. We only got two studios here and they aren't used very often. So this is completely yours, but because the other one is unoccupied half of the time you can use it too. If you need anything you can just ask me, I'm usually in the little bureau at the end of the hallway. I'm gonna leave you two alone to work then." They guy said and left then, not without shooting Shay a last smile of course.

As soon as the door had shut behind him Jude sighed and said annoyed:

"Oh my god, this guy is really disgusting!"

"Why? He seemed not that bad to me. What did he do wrong?" Shay asked surprised.

"Please, he was like all over you. I bet he's gay and has a crush on the big Shay!" Jude said with a grin when she saw Shay's face. Then she imitated the guy: "Yeah, you're so right Shay, of course, just like you say, wanna fuck with me? I love you!"

Then she had to stop talking because she was already laughing to hard. She collapsed on a chair in front of the soundboard and couldn't stop laughing at Shay's shocked and blushed face. Shay didn't seem to know what was happening to him and like most guys he couldn't really deal with people calling him gay.

"Oh shut up! That's SO not true. I'm not gay! You're so 15 sometimes!" Shay said trying unsuccessful to defend himself, not getting that his words only made her laugh harder. After all HE had now been the one to imply that HE was gay, and Jude found that extremely funny given that it was the "S to the h to the a to the y" Shay who was talking nonsense.

"I guess that's Spied bad influence. In fact, when I was fifteen and dated you I was probably less childish then ever after that damn tour with SME. Although I think I was more of a fool when I was fifteen for dating a guy who was cheating on me!" Jude said but she smiled at Shay and took that way the seriousness of the last words. Shay flinched a little, but changed the topic quickly, not wanting to talk about the past once again.

"That Spied seems to be very interesting. You talk about him and his band often enough, I can't believe I don't know them yet."

Jude hesitated to answer the indirect question in Shay words. He had asked her before a few times when he would get to meet those fabulous friends of hers. She had always put it off to "later" or "soon enough". But that was when they were traveling and searching for a new label. Now she had no more excuses left.

"Look, it's not like I don't want you to meet him or the others, it's just… I don't know. They won't be very nice, I'm afraid. You know Jamie and he hates you for what you've done and he won't forget. Tommy wasn't really a fan of yours too and me neither to be true. So they are skeptical to say the least. They are out for you and they don't like me getting close to you again too, although I told them that we're just friends. Besides, I haven't seen them for quite some time too. Since your dear uncle fired me I've been busy with other things, Spied has Karma, this TV-Show and now he's at NBR and not any longer at G-Major. Hell, I don't even know what the rest of SME is doing. As far as I know they are still at G-Major, but without Spied…" Jude sounded doubtful and uncertain; she asked herself for the first time what her old friends were actually doing now without Spied.

"Sadie's at G-Major and Kwest's the whole time. I'm not blaming her or anything; it's just that I don't really get to see her that much anymore and with the others it's the same story. It's just a little bit complicated right now so don't take it personally, ok?" Jude asked pleadingly playful. Shay smiled at her but she could see that he was worried a little bit. And his next words confirmed that he was worried about her.

"Jude, I understand it and I'm not complaining or accusing or anything at all. I don't know what exactly happened before I came back, because you won't tell me any details, but I don't want you to not see your friends anymore because of me. I'm happy that we spend so much time together, but you'll regret it if you don't do nothing with your friends."

"Don't Shay. You don't need to be worried. I just talked to Jamie this morning, we haven't talk for ages and had kinda a little fight the last time, but now we're friends again. And I'm really glad about it. But you're my friend too and the other will have to accept that. Besides, I wouldn't spend much more time with them even if you hadn't come back. I mean, let's be honest, since I'm not at G-Major any longer there's something missing. I used to see Sadie and SME and Jamie each damn day, that's of course different now. First Jamie left the label months ago because of me and Tommy, then I and Tommy broke up and I was fired. Spied resigned two weeks ago. The connection is just not there anymore and I honestly don't know if I and Spied and the other boys will manage to stay as close as we used to be. Spied's freaking married and we just don't get to see each other anymore. Sadie's at work the whole time because she's like Darius' personal slave and she spends the nights at Kwest's because he's her boyfriend. You know everything's changing and it's not like I have nobody. I still have you and Megan and most likely I will have Jamie too. I know, poor trade, but well…" She joked and grinned at Shay to show him that he didn't need to worry.

Shay punched her on the shoulder playfully and grinned too. He was glad to hear that she counted him as one of her close friends. And he was happy because she didn't count Tommy to them anymore. He hated that guy. But he was still worried that Jude would lose her friends, because no matter how much she rationalized the situation, Shay knew her well enough to know that she wasn't taking it anywhere near that lightly.

"Ok, then let's get back to work Shorty. Should I start or do you have a song you want to record?"

"No, you can start. As I'm the producer now I got to say what we'll do right?" Jude asked with a smile that Shay didn't like at all.

"I guess. I really don't like that smile of yours. It's evil and I know it! So what did you plan now?" He asked, knowing something was up.

"Don't talk to me in that tone. Don't you have any respect? Now go in there and show me what you got before I realize that I'm just wasting my time!" Jude said, imitating Darius ordering tone, while making faces. Shay laughed and went into the sound booth. "Ok, let's get to work then, big D!"

Jude grinned to herself and adjusted the soundboard. She was still surprised that she had told Shay the whole story just like that. Ok, not the whole story considering she didn't say a word about Tommy, but pretty much everything else.

_Seems like I really do trust him again. But it's not that surprising through, I spend the whole last two weeks with him. He makes me laugh and I don't get to think too much about Tommy when I'm with him. Maybe because he doesn't know and because he doesn't remind me of him. But he's right, I really gotta talk to Spied and the others. Can't let them get strangers. But… I don't really want to face them. Wait, what's wrong with me? They are my best friends. Or were. Oh I just don't know! Everything's so messed up and nothing is like it used to be. Normally I would be a G-Major everyday, I would fool around with SME and fight with Tommy. I probably would have forgiven him by now and we would start that "thing" again. That thing that always started when we tried to be "just friends". _

_But it's different now. I'm not at G-Major anymore, Tommy and I are over for good, Shay's back and I got a plan. What a hell of a mix._

_Fuck, he's already started singing! I should better listen, if I don't Shay'll know something is up. And I sure as hell don't want to discuss Tommy right now or generally with Shay for that matter._

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So... did you like it or not? This chapter's more of a filler actually, I wanted to tell in what a situation Jude is and everything, because she lost contact to most of her friends... Next chapter's gonna be better, I think...

Please review, as always ;)


	5. 5 Two plans equals one misery

Ok, here's the next chapter... Thanks for my first review by **ISana55**. It made me a happy person ;)... So thanks to that review I updated immediately...

I tried to get some Tommy in it too, some parts are in Tommy's POV and some in Jude's but you'll figure that out. It's the first time I wrote from tommys POV and I hope it's not too bad...

Enjoy reading and don't forget to review....

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Mistaken – Chapter 5 – Two plans equals one misery

At G-Major…

Tommy was sitting in the studio all alone. Nothing new here. He was sitting there alone in front of the soundboard every now and then and recently it was getting some kind of routine. He always got into a fight with Karma or one of his other artists and in the end he threw them out of the studio or they left willingly. It was the third time this week and **this week** had only had 3 days yet. But who kept really counting?

Tommy looked at his watch and wondered what was up with Darius. Karma had left like 15 minutes ago and usually Darius was already yelling at him by now. He was one to talk. He had lost his best tw artists a few weeks ago and his mysterious new artist that he kept talking about was nowhere to be seen. So Tommy was really giving a shit about Darius telling him to get his shit together. He wanted to tell Darius that he should get his problems straight before yelling at others, but he didn't because nowadays it was possible that Darius would just fire him. This new Darius was scary, he didn't seem to give a damn about money.

_If he did he wouldn't have let Jude and Shay walk out of the studio.__ If Jude was still here… I wouldn't have this stupid problems. She and I would be working right now on one of her songs and she would probably have forgiven me by now. I would have apologized long ago and everything would be fine. But now… Now everything's fucked up. Just like my whole life's totally fucked up. I didn't even got a damn chance to apologize. Well, I got it but I blew it. And now I don't know what to do. She won't listen to me now. I wouldn't want to listen to me too._

He was shaking his head and grabbed a newspaper that laid around. It was the newest one and he hadn't dared to read it yet. He had began to buy the papers regularly because he was a masochist. That was the only reason he could come up with himself. Because every damn day there were new pictures of Jude and Shay, being spotted somewhere in New York or Seattle or walking through the streets of Toronto. The press was wondering what the both of them were up to and they of course warmed up all the stories of the past and her 16th birthday.

_She should just fucking read these papers, then she would have hundred reasons to stay away from that guy! And here we go again. Shay and Jude and Jude and Shay. Diamond Records. Oh, great. Now they got a new label together. Damn it, this boy isn't stupid. That I haven't guessed it before! They were searching a new label together, that was what he wanted from Jude from the beginning. _

Tommy wanted to kick himself for being so stupid. It had been so obvious. Now they were working together and whatever Shay did, Jude wouldn't stay mad very long. After all that was the only reason Jude hadn't walked away from Tommy before.

_Fucking shit, I really have to get Jude back quickly before she falls for this excuse of a guy again. __I have to get this song done and released ASAP but this stupid Darius doesn't let me. Well, then I guess it's back to: FUCK Darius! Because I got a plan to get Jude back and I'd be damned if I'd fail this one!_

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Jude was at home, starring at her phone. Contemplating if she should or shouldn't call Spied.

_Damn it, I'm really a crybaby. __I just have to pick up this damn phone, dial Spied's number and as soon as he starts talking I won't even know what in hell I was scared of. So what's keeping me from doing it? Well, if that isn't the question of the day. Spied is my best friends for god's sake. But… so what was keeping HIM from calling me? After all I was his best man, his best friend too. Even though I didn't like Karma I stood up for him, I was always there for him. And now he didn't even tell me he resigned from G-Major. What went wrong with us?_

Jude sighed. It seemed like her whole life was turned upside down. A month ago everything had seemed so great, she had been at G-Major, she had been with Tommy. It had been perfect. But when she now thought about it, she realized that when she had been with Tommy she had drifted away from her friends to. Not intentionally, but she had concentrated on Tommy and her friends had concentrated on their lives. She regretted letting them drifting away, but on the other hand she kind of knew that she would do it all over again if she was with Tommy again. And that scared her like hell.

_Just one more reason to stay with the plan. Damn it. I'll call Spied later. Maybe he'll even call. I gotta get to the studio, working on my new song. And I have to talk to Gregory, I want to release it as soon as possible._

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Tommy was coming out of the sound booth, feeling better than the whole last weeks. He had recorded the first version of his song for Jude and it felt good to be back in front of the mic. It felt good to do something. He had had a fight with Darius one hour ago, but now he was grinning again. Something that wasn't usual at all. Normally Darius made Tommy's mood even worse than before and then even Kwest didn't want to be around him. And that stood for something.

Tommy grinned because that also meant that he would be left alone for quite some time. What more could he wish for?

While Tommy was mixing his song and trying out a few things someone suddenly knocked at the studio door. Tommy groaned but knew he couldn't prevent being disturbed, he stopped the song and turned his chair around so that he was facing the door.

"Hey man" Kwest strode in tentatively.

"Hey" Tommy said, half relieved that it was Kwest and not Darius or someone else, half angry because he knew he wouldn't get rid of Kwest that easily as soon as his best friend sensed that something was up.

Bad luck for Tommy that him being in the studio all alone without having to work was indeed unusual for him. Normally that fight with Darius would have brought him to the next bar with no doubt. And exactly this abnormality had made Kwest search his best friend, as Tommy guessed.

"How you're doing? I heard there was another fight?" Kwest asked and sat down next to Tommy. He was clearly curious what was up with Tommy but he didn't want to be too blunt.

"Yeah. Darius seems to think it's my fault that Karma has no discipline and no ability to deal with critic." Tommy said sharply, still upset about what Darius had thrown at him this time. It had become real ugly real quickly. Darius had dared for the first time for years to tell Tommy again that he was a total screw-up. But this time Darius had crossed a line; he had said that Jude was way better off without Tommy and that he was nothing but trouble for everyone. Tommy had literally punched Darius. Which had made the latter leave the studio as quickly as possible. After all no one was stupid enough to get into a fight with a furious Tom Quincy.

"Right." Kwest said sarcastically. He HAD seen Darius bleeding nose and he knew Tommy well enough to know who has caused it. And he knew which topic was the only one that made Tommy lose his temper nowadays.

"What?" Tommy asked aggressive, hating this knowing tone in Kwest just too well.

"Tommy, let's be honest. Nothing's wrong with Karma, she might be a bitch sometimes, but this time you screwed up. Damn it, do you want to lie to me and say me that you didn't punch Darius?" Kwest asked annoyed with Tommy's sudden anger. He already knew the pattern: Tommy screwed up, Kwest tried to confront him and Tommy got angry and backed out somehow. But this time it wasn't just a screw up, Tommy had to get his shit together, if he wanted to get Jude back and to not get fired.

"Yeah, I did. So what? He was asking for it!"

"So what?? He's your freaking BOSS, if he'll fire you he'll make sure you'll never get another job in the business. At some point even Darius puts his pride before money. You might be the best producer, but that doesn't justify you punching Darius because he said something wrong. You always say you want Jude back, that you're done running and the whole shit. So stop moping around and start to WORK. Show Jude and everyone else around here that you changed. Show her that you're worth coming back and that it's not just another mood of yours!" Kwest said loudly. Normally he never yelled at his friend, but he was pretty close this time. He hated to see Tommy getting drunk each day before, but now he was about to really lose Jude for good.

The rage was burning in Tommy, and his usual "Who fucking cares?"- attitude was kicking in once again. Now he would yell at his best friend, would close himself to the truth and run away - to the next bar to make a new record in getting drunk.

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Jude was walking out of Starbucks, her favorite café in the whole world. She had just drunk a tall Latte Macchiato Caramel inside and was now leaving her personal paradise with an Espresso To Go. After she had given up sitting around in the studio, trying to finish her newest song lyrics, she had left the studio, walking through the city without destination. It was raining softly and there weren't too many people on Toronto's street compared with the other days. When she had began freezing she had gone to Starbucks and had warmed herself up with some café.

Someone who was passing her by was brushing her unintentionally while she was just taking a little sip of her espresso. Too much of the hot liquid came too quickly into her mouth and burned her tongue. She stopped and tears shot into her eyes.

"Fuck!" she cried while breathing the relative cold air in and out her mouth heavily. Why had this damn shit to be so hot??

"I'm sorry" A voice came from behind her. It was strangely familiar. Jude turned around and was taken aback by the person standing in front of her. Her hurt tongue was forgotten momentarily.

"No problem. You should just be more careful when you're passing by this Starbucks, well, or any café actually, next time, because there's a high probability that I'm just walking out of it." Jude said smiling friendly.

The guy laughed: "I'll try to remember that. My image as a gentleman could be at risk if I brush too many beautiful ladies as you are. I'm Johnathan by the way. Johnny if you want to call me like my friends and most other people do."

"Oh I know who you are and you know it, Johnny D.! You're one of the hottest, ehm, most famous moviestars in Hollywood. What brings you to Toronto?"

"Business. It's always about business. This time I'm not here for filming through. But you know, in Hollywood you're nothing without a CD. But in my case it's a different, I can at least sing. I'm starting at G-Major tomorrow and wanted to see the city today. This Mills-man was very friendly, it was actually pretty creepy, I think he would have guided me himself. And if you knew him, you'd know why I said he's creepy. Ok, I'm talking too much, I guess."

Jude had to smile as Johnny even blushed a little bit. THE Johnny D. The actor who already got two Oscars and wasn't even 22 yet. He was the dream of every girl, had baby blue eyes and not too short not too long blonde surfer hair and his body was trained as hell as everyone had seen in "Blue Docs".

"No, no. I like listening to you. And I kind of know what you mean."

"What? You know Darius Mills?"

"Kind of…" Jude said grinning evilly when she thought about Darius and how he must already regret letting her go when he was desperate enough to accept some Hollywood-star.

"Hey, you know what? I got an idea. Do you know the G-Major studios too?" Johnny asked with a wide grin.

Jude hesitated, not wanting to lie but neither wanting to tell Johnny how she knew Darius. So she just asked: "Why?"

"Because Mills throws a party to welcome me in three days. And I would love to have you accompanying me. So please, would you go to the party with me? I'll introduce you to everybody and show you around in the studios, if you want to!"

Jude chuckled, that would be a hell of a tour. She didn't have anything against Johnny, but she truthfully doubt that he was that much of a singer. Besides, there wouldn't be anything new to see and Darius would probably throw a little fit.

_Well, alone to see Darius face could be worth it…__ but on the other hand…_

"No, I don't think that's a good idea. Darius wouldn't be very pleased to see me I think. Neither would I probably." Jude's cell was ringing, cutting her of while speaking. She motioned an excuse to Johnny and accepted the call.

"Hello?"  
"Hey, it's me Shay and I'm waiting for you at the studio. Where you should be right now by the way. I just listened to your new song and I think it's gonna be a hit, but we have to do some work, you know?"

"Yeah, I'm coming. See ya" And with that she hung up again, not wanting to say anything that would tip Johnny off who she really was.

"Look Johnny, I really gotta go, you know, work. Thanks for the invitation, but believe me, you're better off without me there. See you around, maybe!" Jude said and walked away.

But she was hold back by someone. No one other as Johnny of course.

"Mills can't keep me from bringing you there, and if he doesn't like you… well, I haven't signed any contract jet, you know. So he WILL like you."

"Aw, that's sweet. You know, maybe it's not such a bad idea…" But then Jude remembered what Darius had said last to her and she rethought her answer. She wouldn't go back to G-Major. "No, no I'm sorry."

"Hey, wait! Don't just walk away. Tell me at least you name!" Johnny cried when Jude was walking away again. She turned around while still walking away and said with a smile:  
"You know what? If you find me, I go with you to that freaking party!" Then she went around a corner and was vanished in the crowd.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Look Kwest, I'm not as screwed up as you think. I know you think right now I'd give a fuck at everything, that I would just bathe myself in pity once again. But that's not the case. I got a plan and I will get Jude back, no matter what it costs. I'll show her that I love her." Tommy said quietly to his best friend, he was tired of getting angry, tired of getting drunk and the hangovers in the next mornings.

"Man, I never said that I think you're screwed up. You're my best friend and I just can't stand seeing you giving up. I know this sounds harsh, but you shouldn't just focus on Jude, because man, you messed this up and Jude might not forgive you, then you'll be falling hard again." Kwest said tentatively, surprised that he was still so calm. Kwest hoped he would be able to convince his best friend to get his whole life straight again, he didn't want to relive the "Angie-disaster". Although he was afraid that this time it would be even worse, because Tommy really seemed to love Jude.

"No, I can't let her give up on me. You don't understand this. I freaking love her. And besides, I got a plan to get her back. I wrote a new song. It will show Jude that I love her more than anything else! Don't say that she won't forgive me, she has to give me a second chance!"

"Yeah, you got a plan. That's great, but you know Jude she'll have a plan too. You want to get her back, she wants to move on. It's the same old story. Jude&you+two plans equals one misery. Because you two always work against each other, you both love each other, but one of you is always NOT ready. That one used to be you, but now…"

"Shut the hell up!"

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Ok, that was it for this chap... what do you think? I couldn't think of a good name for Johnny, first I settled for Sammy, but I just didn't like that one... Please review... Then I'll update soon the next chapter... ;)


	6. 6 Can we talk in private?

Don't have much to say this time. Here's the next chapter just finished it and it's already morning here, so now I'll go to bed. Right now I'm inspired for this fic and I have sooo many ideas, so you can expect the next update pretty soon. The used songlyrics are written by myseld, so I would be extremely happy if you'd tell me what you think about it. Or about that chapter.

Enjoy reading and PLEASE don't forget to review!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Mistaken – Chapter 6 – Could we talk in private?

Three days later…

Jude was leaving the house, she was late for work again but in no real rush. After all it was only Shay waiting for her. Jude grinned amused when she thought about the rapper waiting at the studio. He always threw little diva fits when Jude was late again and Jude simply loved watching him getting upset. She was somehow always able to confuse him and then he was kind of forgetting why he had been mad and then he was trying to get back focused again. And then she usually made him nervous because she made some insinuations he couldn't brush off. Or she put him on a guilt trip again because of her 16th birthday. It was really funny and she liked to do it like every day.

"Hey beautiful" Someone said as Jude was just about to get into her car. She looked up startled and recognized Johnny standing at his car in the other roadside.

"Well if that isn't the new sentence that get's you every woman. Honestly, don't you have any better things? I mean you're Johnny D., the Johnny D., you're bound to have something better!" Jude said smiling.

"I have something better, but why waste it when I don't need it?" Johnny retorted chuckling.

"Oh, you did NOT just say that."Jude said looking very upset.

"What if I did?"

"Then you can forget whatever you came for." Jude said and climbed into her car. She slammed the door shut and started the engine. But before she could pull out of the driveway her door was opened again.

"Hey, don't you forget something? You said if I found you, you'd come with me to the party. I spend the last three days searching for the girl with the short blonde hair who I couldn't get out of my head. Please don't tell me my sentences messed up the work of three days."

"Shit happens." Jude said, biting back a smile and keeping her face straight. She wasn't really mad, but he shouldn't have it too easy.

"Ok, I take it back. I'm sorry. But do you really think you mean nothing to me when spend my time with searching you? Besides, what's wrong with "hey beautiful"? You are beautiful after all."

"Aww, the big Johnny D.'s a softie. Never saw that coming! What will the media say?!"

"If they write the truth they'll say: Johnny D.'s falling for Jude Harrison" or "Johnny D. and Jude Harrison together at the last G-Major party"."

"Oh, oh" Jude said like a nerd who just had an idea "and they will invent some cool names for us like Judy or something as awful as that." Jude said acting like one of these cheerleader cliché chicks. "What makes you think someone as I'd fancy this?"

"The fact that you're still here and talking to me and that I'm THE Johnny D. of course, no one can resist me!"

"Don't try me." Jude threatened smiling again.

"I would never do that. So… are you coming with me tonight?"

"Well, I would love to see the family again, but unfortunately I got no dress. So I'm really sorry but I think you have to get yourself some other company. But give me a call and tell me how it went!"

"Hey, hey. Not so fast, babe. What if I tell you that I'll kidnap you and drag you to the mall right now. And I'll only let you get away if you buy yourself some nice dress."

"Oh a bad boy. I like those."

"So what do you say? Do I have to use violence or are you coming with me willingly?"

"Hm… I guess I could go shopping with you. But we gotta go to the studio first, I gotta at least tell Shay that I won't work today. Oh god, he'l be furious!" Jude chuckled "But that makes it even more worth it, I mean what's better than going shopping with Johnny D. and having Shay being mad and pouting?"

"Don't forget that cool party tonight that you're going to with me, THE Johnny D."

"Yeah, that's the icing on the cake… Let's go." Jude smiled at Johnny and got a strange feeling in her stomach when he returned the smile – but strange in a good way.

An hour later Jude was leaving the studio, climbing into Johnny's car with a big grin plastered on her face.

"I'm sorry I made you wait, but Shay and I had to discuss something."

"No problem. What got you looking that happy? Thinking of shopping with me?"

"Not exactly. Can I turn on the radio?" Jude asked obviously excited. Johnny laughed at her weird behavior but nodded while driving away.

"_**Here's your favorite radio station "Sunshine Music" and with us you'll get the newest songs before everyone else gets to hear them. Next is the new single of Jude Harrison, the first ever Instant Star. It's called "The Best Worst Thing".**_

_**You're always messing around**_

_**You keep standing up to the ground**_

_**You look but you don't see**_

_**What's really going on with me**_

_**You're way too busy with yourself**_

_**You got a problem but don't ask me for help**_

_**Do what you please**_

_**But don't count on me**_

_**I'm so sick of your crap**_

_**You're the best worst thing I've ever had**_

_**Leave or stay, I don't care anymore**_

_**If you want just walk out this door**_

_**But if you go, stay away forever**_

_**If you go what we two had is shattered**_

_**Do what you please**_

_**But don't count on me**_

_**I'm so sick of your crap**_

_**You're the best worst thing I've ever had**_

_**Do what you please**_

_**But don't count on me**_

_**I'm so sick of your crap**_

_**You're the best worst thing I've ever had**_

_**That was the latest single of top singer Jude Harrison. She just started at Diamond Records and next Saturday she'll be at our radio show, so stay tuned! Let's get to our next song…"**_

"Wow, that's a hell of a song babe! I love it!"

"Aww, thanks. I know it's mind-blowing like all of my songs, but you should better concentrate on the road than on me, because you just passed the street to the mall, you fool!" Jude said laughing at Johnny's offended face.

"Women. Always the same old story." Johnny murmured and made a u-turn on the crowded street what made Jude scream.

"Are you crazy?" She yelled.

But he only laughed and answered: "Maybe."

"You look beautiful!" Johnny said when he saw Jude opening the door. He was standing in front of her house at 8 p.m. to pick Jude up.

Jude blushed slightly, smiled flattered by Johnny's honest look and answered: "You don't look too bad yourself."

They walked over to the stretch limo Johnny came with and he opened Jude the door like a real gentleman. The drive to G-Major was not very interesting thanks to some phone call Johnny had to take. But it didn't really bother Jude, she just watched the lights of the city during the night, it still had something magical and these lights had inspired her to the one or the other song already. They always reminded her of those nights when she and Jamie were kids and they had laid on the roof top of Jude's house and looked over the city.

When the limo arrived in front of G-Major Johnny went out first, because he was sitting on the right side of the car. Jude took a deep breath and prepared herself for the evening and followed Johnny. G-Major hadn't changed a bit at all, and the decoration was awesome as ever. But it didn't really impress Jude, because she had been at enough of these parties to get used to it. Darius' parties were famous for the quality and the atmosphere and just everything.

"Does Darius know that I'm coming with you?" Jude asked Johnny when they walked in the hall.

"No. Why should he?"

"Well, I thought that would have been a good idea, considering I told you that he and I, we're not exactly on good terms. If you want to put it that way." Jude said quietly while smiling to some intern she knew.

"And I told you he will be nice. He needs me, or better G-Major needs me."

Jude sighed. She didn't know what to expect from Darius, she had said some not every nice things in a few interviews she had done since she left G-Major. She didn't know what to expect from herself when she met him. "We'll see."

Johnny had his arm placed around Jude and greeted some people he knew. Because it was one of Darius parties there always were many people of the business from the whole country and many of the states too. Johnny seemed to know quite many people in the music biz for a film star. He introduced Jude to many people and always mentioned her "great music" and things.

They were just talking to a manager of another record company when Darius approached.

"Johnny, good to see you!" Darius said and the manager excused himself politely. Darius ignored the fact that he just interrupted a conversation completely – just like he didn't seem to notice Jude at all.

"Darius. This party's great. You really overdid yourself this time!" Johnny said who obviously hadn't been on another of Darius' parties yet.

"Thanks. Well you know, gotta impress the competition. Scares them off a little bit." Darius said and laughed loudly.

"Yeah" Johnny said with a polite smile on his face. "Darius, this is Jude. I think you two know each other already." Johnny looked Darius straight in the eyes, it was clear that he wouldn't let Darius just ignore Jude.

Darius looked startled, he wasn't used to people talking to him like that. Jude was sure he would make some sharp comment to put Johnny back into his place, but surprisingly he didn't. He put on a clearly fake smile and said quietly: "Of course. I'm sorry Jude. Welcome to this party and it's good to see you too."

"Thanks Darius. You know when Johnny here asked me out to this party and told me he just signed a contract I couldn't resist seeing all of my old friends again. I heard Milo's album didn't do that well. I'm sorry for G-Major, although I anticipated something like this; I was always against putting appearance before talent at the Instant Star contest." Jude said sweetly while biting back laugher and an evil smile. She had cheered loudly when Milo's album didn't even made it to the charts. She really hated that guy and she had felt gloating joy when she thought about the amount of money Darius must lose because he had Milo under contract.

Darius' smile faded and anger was written all over his features. He was clearly fighting the urge to yell at Jude. She was smiling innocently, while Johnny was pulling her closer to him.

Darius ignored Jude's words and excused himself from the two. As soon as he was gone Jude began chuckling and Johnny smiled too.

"That was great!" Jude said smiling broadly.

"Yeah, and that all just because you have me." Johnny said cocky.

"Get over yourself. I would have enjoyed giving him my piece of mind as much as now if he would have yelled. It's not like he would still scare me or could fire me." Jude said grinning. Then she spotted Kwest and Tommy in the crowd. They were standing a little distanced from the rest of the party and seemed to be in a interesting conversation. Jude couldn't tear her eyes from the two people and excuse herself to Johnny:

"Johnny? I, ehm, gotta talk to some old… friends. Would you mind…?"

"No, of course not. Just save the first dance for me, yeah?"

"Of course!" Jude said while already walking away, not really listening to what he said. When she was approaching the two talking guys she hid behind a pillar and listened to the conversation.

"… you can't just leave now. You said you wouldn't do this again!" Kwest said upset.

"Man, I told you, I'm sorry. I didn't plan this. But I can't stay. I have to take care of some things, you know?"

"No I don't know, because you don't tell anything. I'm your best friend and you can't tell me?"

Tommy didn't say anything and Kwest seemed to be even more upset. "You know what? Do your thing, but don't come to me later when everything's even more messed up. When will you be back?"

"I don't know." Tommy said quietly

"Great" Kwest commented and walked away.

Jude was coming out from her hideaway, now she was seeing Tommy. He was standing there, the head low, his hands in his pockets; typical Tommy. And he had that look on his face, that sad puppy look that got him every girl.

_He's leaving town? Leaving, again? What if something's wrong with his mother? But why wouldn't he tell Kwest. Maybe it's because of me. But he wouldn't leave because of me, would he?_

"So you're leaving?" Jude asked quietly, but loud enough for Tommy to hear her. His head shot up at the sound of her voice and he was looking at her stunned. He definitely hadn't expect her to show up.

"Yeah." He said after a few moments.

"Look… I don't know why you're leaving, but I think… could we talk somewhere?" Jude asked, she didn't know what she wanted to say, but she somehow felt she had to. She didn't know if she would get a chance again and if she would have the courage again.

Tommy looked even more surprised this time, but he nodded and walked into studio C, the nearest studio. Jude followed him, thinking how ironic it was that they were about to talk in studio c of all studios.

"So…" Tommy said after Jude had closed the door and just stared at his with her arms crossed about her chest.

"Yeah. Ok." Jude said like to get her head straight again "What I wanted to say is: I'm sorry."

She looked him in the eyes for the first time and she found two blue eyes starring back at her and she felt like he was looking right through her, right through all her defenses and plans and lies. But he didn't say anything, so she just continued. "I didn't want us to end the way we did. What I said back there at my house was harsh, and you had just come to warn me. But you didn't need to, Shay's changed. You said that you'd still care, and I would lie if I say I don't too. It's just that I think there's no good in us trying to be friends. You know, at some point there's just too much. I think moving on with our lives would be the best for both of us. I overreacted that day a few weeks ago, but I meant what I said through. You hurt me but I don't want us to hate each other. Nobody could ever replace you. You helped me to become who I am today. And because of you I'm twice the artist I thought I could ever be." Jude paused a few seconds. It sounded so much like a good-bye in her ears, and although that was what she intended it still felt… wrong?!

"I just wanted to say that, you know?" Jude finished quietly, so quiet that Tommy could barely hear her.

"And I'm twice the producer I could have ever been without of you. You say it would be better to move on and maybe you're right, but I can't. I care to much about you. I didn't mean it when I said you were poison. I was scared, afraid of how much I needed and missed you. I love you, always did and always will. But if you don't feel the same, then I still can't have you not in my life. Let's at least try to be friends, Jude, I miss you, I really do." Tommy asked her to, it sounded a little bit like he begged her to not leave him. Something that hasn't happened before for sure.

"Tommy, I…" Jude began, but he interrupted her. He closed the gap between them and laid a finger on her mouth to shut her up. He looked her in the eyes, caught her gaze and hold it.

"Jude, I love you. I'm sorry for all the times I messed up, but I'm done running."

"You said that before." Jude whispered, but she didn't push him away, although he was standing right in front of her, his face in front of hers, they could feel each other's breath on their skin. Both knew that Tommy would kiss her and both knew that Jude wouldn't push him away, no matter what she said.

"But this time I mean it." Tommy murmured huskily and kissed her. Jude closed her eyes and savored the feeling; although she told herself not to she responded immediately, she put her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. His hands roamed over her body while he kissed her feverishly. He had missed feeling her and he had dreamed of this too often, it felt so right to feel her body against his. Jude answered to Tommy's passion with her own fire and she held nothing back, like they both had to make up for the weeks of being apart. A moan escaped Jude's mouth when Tommy was pressing her against a wall and she couldn't remember a time she ever felt that happy.

THIS felt right, who had they been to fight destiny?

Suddenly a noise came from the door. Someone was trying to open it but it clamped like most of the times. However this sound brought Jude out of her daze and she realized what she and Tommy had been about to do. "Oh my god…" She whispered when she thought of what all the other would say. She had had a plan and there she was, ignoring every reasonable thought as soon as Tommy was near her. She broke away from Tommy but felt like her whole body was on fire. She saw that betrayed look in Tommy's eyes and the hurt and the heartbreak she knew just too well. She blushed and adjusted her clothe quickly.

Then the door opened and revealed a cursing Johnny. He looked first at Jude, then at Tommy and then back at Jude. He clearly didn't suspect anything. Stupid, but he didn't know nothing about Jude and Tommy.

"Hey, here you are, finally. I searched you. They just started to dance and you know, the first belongs to me, your companion."

Jude forced a smile and walked over to him, glad that he didn't suspect something, but on the other side, why should he?

"Right, of course. I was just trying to talk to Tommy in private. He'll be leaving town and he's been an old friend of mine, you know."

"Oh, yeah, of course. Ehm, have I interrupted anything? Should I wait outside for you?" Johnny asked cutely, completely oblivious to what was happening really right in front of his eyes.

"No no, there's no need, I'm coming with you. We were finished anyway." She assured Johnny with a fake smiling face, then she addressed Tommy: "Ok, then I guess that's it. There's nothing left to talk about I think. I wish you the best! If you don't come back from your trip, have a nice life. Good-bye Tommy!" Then she grabbed Johnny's hand and dragged him out.

"Did you two fight or something?" Johnny asked when they were outside, finally noticing that something was wrong. Jude had to restrain herself from rolling her eyes, how oblivious could someone be?

_But how could he guess what happened? He doesn't know about Tommy and me and so he just hears that stupid good-bye of mine. I should really thank god for that old studio door._

"Kind of." Jude said when they reached the dancefloor. She saw that he was about to ask something and said smiling: "I don't wanna talk about it right now, ok?"

"Ok." He answered and returned her smile. But Jude still felt like on fire. It was like she could still feel HIS arms all over her, like she could still smell and taste HIM. Johnny's hands felt wrong and she missed HIS touch. At the same time she felt stupid for giving in. She had said the one thing but her body had betrayed her. Suddenly Jude had the urge to do something, to get rid of this sick feeling in her stomach.

She kissed Johnny on the lips, in front of everybody. And he responded. She had to admit that he was a very good kisser, but it felt like kissing a child compared with kissing Tommy. It didn't really make her feel better, but it was something.

"Should we leave? You seem to not be very happy." Johnny whispered in her right ear. She nodded grateful and soon they were standing outside in front of G-Major. Jude caught herself hoping that Tommy would come after her, that he would force her to end what they had started. As soon as she had formed that thought she wanted to smack herself.

"Could you bring me home? I don't feel good." She whispered to Johnny.

He nodded and opened her the door of a limo. At her house he walked her to the door and asked when they stopped in front of the house:

"I really liked this evening. Do you want to go to the cinema with me next week; maybe we can eat something afterwards."

Jude looked at him, she was still feeling torn and was angry on herself, for letting happening what happened – and for stopping it. What was if Tommy had said the truth, then she was ruining her dreams. But on the other side, what if he hadn't??

_Oh stop it. I can't fall for him again. I can't go through all of this all over again. I just CAN'T._

"Yeah, I'd like that. You'll call me then?" Jude asked and shot him another fake smile. She thanked silently that Johnny didn't know her very well, because she wasn't that much of a good liar.

"Yeah, I will. I hope you'll get better soon!" Johnny said, kissed her softly and walked back to the limo while Jude went into her house, getting ready for another sleepless night.

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That was it... Do you hate me for letting Johnny interrupt Jude and TOmmy? I'd understand... xD... But please tell me what you think, even if it's just that you hate that they were interrupted!


	7. 7 A picture says more than 1000 words

Ok guys, this is the latest chapter. I got some kind of writers block with my other stories, so you'll probably get another update today or tomorrow, so I thought I split this day of Jude's in two chapters (7&8). Also because I hope for some review that gives me some new ideas, because in the next chapter there's gonna be the big date with Johnny ;). Tommy probably will be gone for two chapters, or at least for the next... I guess... :)

Enjoy reading and don't forget to review, pretty pretty please...

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Mistaken – Chap 7 – A picture says more than thousand words

Jude woke up and switched off the alarm clock next to her bed. She hated waking up early, but she had to due to the radio interview that was beginning in a few hours. It was Saturday, Monday night had been the party at G-Major, Tuesday had been a hell of a day and it was the first day that Jude was about to actually leave the house since the day Tommy left. Tuesday… She remembered how her Tuesday had begun…

_Flashback…_

It was six o'clock in the morning, Jude laid in her bed, tired as hell but not able to sleep. She hadn't sleep at all the whole night. She had been thinking about her and Tommy. About if she could let go or if she should give them another shot. She however hadn't really found a solution. How she couldn't decide to give Tommy a chance but how she sure as hell couldn't abandon any hope either.

When she heard voices from downstairs she had thought first it was Tommy, but then settled for the most probably explanation, assuming it was Sadie and Kwest. She stood up because she knew that her sister would sooner or later come looking for her anyway and at that moment Jude felt a craving for coffee.

Sadie and Jude talked for a while, since Kwest had proposed Sadie was all about the upcoming marriage. Jude was happy for her sister and had explained her that it was fine with her, but now after that night it wasn't anywhere near fine. But she couldn't say this to her sister, she looked so happy. If Sadie knew what happened she would concentrate on Jude and try to help her little sister, she would not spend all her time preparing her marriage how she wanted to and Jude didn't really want to know what an end she and Tommy would take if Sadie helped her. No, she couldn't tell her anything.

While Sadie was talking about something that went wrong with the invitations Jude watched secretly Kwest closely. She wondered if he knew what happened. He was his best friend after all. If he did that would explain his silence that day. Sadie had just stopped talking about those wedding invitations with the wrong colors when the phone rang in the hall. Sadie stood up and said she would expect a call and so she'd take that one. That left Jude and Kwest alone in the kitchen.

"So…" Jude begun. When Kwest didn't say something and didn't even look at her she continued, determined to get to the ground of Kwest's strange behavior. "I guess that means you know. He told you?"

"Yeah, he did." Kwest said after a few moments, he sighed and continued. "Look, I'm sorry, I know how you must probably feel, I tried to change Sadie's mind about coming here, but you know her. Since I didn't know if you want her to know I couldn't convince her with the truth, so… Although I'm not sure the truth would have kept her from coming."

"It's ok, I'm fine really. Where is Tommy now? I really need to talk to him about last night." Jude said tentatively, she didn't know what exactly Kwest was sorry for. He somehow didn't sound like he was just sorry because Sadie came over. His words caused a sick feeling in Jude's stomach and she feared what his answer would be. Maybe Tommy had told him not to tell her anything because he didn't want to see her right now.

"You… you don't know?" Kwest asked surprised. Jude shook her head slowly, not getting rid of the feeling that she had missed something big. "I don't know how to tell you. Tommy… he left this morning. For good I guess. He didn't tell me or anyone else where he was going, just that he would leave and didn't know when he would be back. He quit G-Major because Darius didn't want to give him vacation. My guess is that it's either something very serious or he wants to run away from us all. He did that before, just getting up and leaving town to leave his problems behind. I don't want to be the one who breaks it to you, but I guess I should tell you that every time he flew up to now, he never came back till today."

It was like Jude fell out of a bad dream and found out the nightmare was reality. Tommy had left despite of what happened the night before. Tommy had left although he claimed he loved you.

"He left because of me, didn't he?"

"Jude, I don't know, he didn't tell me, but he loves-"

"No, he doesn't. If he did he wouldn't have left. And don't gimme that shit about not knowing, you assume the same as I do, or can you say it to my face and be actually honest about it, that you don't think he left because of me."

Kwest silence spoke for itself. It said more than words could have. Jude felt still too shocked to really feel sad or angry. She just couldn't believe that she had actually thought about giving Tommy a second chance and he'd just left again. She appreciated that Kwest wasn't lying to her, many people would have just told her what she wanted to hear to soothe her. But Kwest wasn't like that.

Then Sadie came back into the kitchen and not long after that she and Kwest left. Jude had spend the whole day at home, crying.

_End of Flashback…_

Since Tuesday she had spend every day at home, not answering calls, nor giving a shit about how she looked. She cried till there were no more tears to shed and began all over again. And mostly she hated herself for being so devastated. When Tommy had told her she was poison she had stayed strong, she hadn't broke down and now? She was crying although nothing had changed as drastic as then. At that time she had broken up with Tommy, but this time he only left, they weren't even together anymore and still it was harder on her then the break up.

_What is wrong with me? __I told him I don't want him back, why can't I just feel as I say I do? Why does he just have to say that he loves me and everything I built is crumbling? I hate feeling like that, I'm broken and I just can't do anything against it. And now Megan made me going to this stupid interview. She was really strange yesterday; she nearly scared me when she said she wouldn't allow me not to go. But whatever. She's right, I gotta go. Gotta show the world what I feel. At least I got some new songs. _

Jude smiled slightly when she thought about her "angry phase" she had the second day after Tommy left. She had written enough songs to make a few new albums just with hate- and moving-on-songs.

Jude left the house an hour later and headed for the radio station. Tonight would although be the date with Johnny. She didn't know anymore why she had agreed to it. She tried to get Tommy of her mind, but she already know it wouldn't work. She just had to get through this interview without starting to cry or beginning to talk about him and everything would be fine, at least that's what she kept telling herself.

The truth was that she knew what finally broke her. When Tommy left and Kwest said he wouldn't come back she realized that it was really over. Because all this time, even when she had broke up with Tommy she still had hoped, dreamed that some day it would be different, that some day they would be together. But somehow this time, him leaving her, it was like an awakeing. She wasn't over him yet, but she really realized that there was NO hope left. Jude still wasn't sure if it was a good thing or not, because she didn't know if she would ever be over it.

Jude walked into the building of the radio station and was immediately greeted by some people who told her where she was needed. She smiled and acted like everything was fine. When she walked by the reception she spotted a newspaper, and the headline was beginning with a very familiar name. Jude felt like everything stopped and the time stood still. This couldn't be true. Since Tuesday nobody had heard from him and now he was in the papers?

_This is too good to be true. Wait, why is this good? He left me, he should stay where he is and better not come back. Too bad I don't really feel like this. I guess I need to talk to him. Getting closure and stuff. Megan was right, I shouldn't need to talk to him, but I need to get this out of my head, this question if he just said he loved me or if he meant it. _

Jude walked over to the woman who was reading the paper and asked her politely if she could have that newspaper for a minute. The woman agreed and gave it to Jude, obviously curious what Jude wanted.

**Tommy Q and his new flame?**

**Little Tommy Q, ex-boybander, was recently seen with this girl (picture) in many places in Montana. Judging from how he's holding on to her on this photo he's found someone for him. Seems like he got over his ex, Jude Harrison, and moved on. Maybe we got our bad boy back, or maybe he just traded one girl for another. Fact is that this two make an awesome couple, don't you think?**

Jude starred at the picture, disbelievingly. Whatever hope she had still had, it was gone now. This was something she couldn't forgive. She couldn't forgive cheating.

_I guess I got the answer to my question. Usually people who love someone don't hug other people like that and they don't kiss them on the forehead so… lovingly. He used to be like that with me. But I guess it's over now and he made the run and moved on real fast. _

"Miss Harrison?" A guy asked nervously and interrupted Jude's thoughts.

"Yeah?" She asked back, not able to tear her eyes from the picture just yet.

"Your interview starts in three minutes."

"Oh, ok. I'm coming." Jude said emotionless and followed the guy carelessly. She still couldn't believe that it had end like that. She saw his picture and knew it was over and that was it. He wouldn't come back, she was sure now. He was gone.

_Maybe it's all my fault, if I hadn't kept on pushing him away… I should have let him apologize I should have told him that we could stay friends. Maybe he wouldn't have run then. He would still be here, maybe even right now here with me. Stop thinking this way, Jude. You can't blame yourself for this. Tommy said what he said and he didn't deserved being friends with you then not more than now. If he wants to let go, who are you to stop him? You need to move on too, so you should be grateful that he isn't making it any harder._

Jude sat down in front of the interviewer who was already talking to the listeners. She felt like she was numb, like all of this was just a dream – or better a nightmare- and she would wake up. She wished so bad that she would wake up. But the interview began, not caring if she was ready or not. So she forced a smile and tried to concentrate – unsuccessfully of course.

"So folks, I'm talking here to Jude Harrison, first ever Instant Star. Jude, hello and I'm glad you're here."

"Thanks Marty. I'm glad to be here too. Hello to all of you!" Jude said in a fake cheerful voice that sounded just plainly wrong in her own ears.

"So you signed recently a new contract with Diamond Records from New York. What made you leave G-Major?"

"Well, me and my manager had some creative differences. My third album wasn't going that well, I had kind of a rough time and my music was suffocating. I guess it was just time for a change and so every party was satisfied with me leaving G-Major. My new label's great and a big plus is that I'm working together with Shay, a close friend of mine, and working makes really fun with him. But I won't forget my time at G-Major either, it brought me so far and I have so many memories I'll never forget."

"So the rumors of Darius Mills firing you because your album sucked aren't true?"

"Except for the fact that my album sucked, no they aren't."

Marty laughed and Jude smiled slightly too, not able to force something that sounded like real laughter.

"You're now working with Shay Mills, right? Are you two back together then? Everybody's talking about it and it wouldn't be the first time that you connect with your producer, would it?"

"I can see where you're coming from, but Shay and I are just friends. We went out when I was fifteen and it was fun, but between us there's nothing but friendship nowadays. And I wouldn't have it any other way, things with Tommy were great, but it complicated everything. It's nice to have a new take on all these things at work."

"What's up with Tommy Q anyway? He was seen in Montana over the last week and a friend of mine told me that he sold his apartment." Jude felt like something hit her right in the stomach. So there they were, asking questions about Tommy. How was she supposed to answer this? The first one had been easy, she had prepared that question, but this…

"What can I say? Tommy's always been a mystery, even to me. It's true, he sold his apartment and quit his job at G-Major, seems to be fashionably in the last month, all I know is that he now is in Montana. I don't know when or if he'll be back, I guess he just needs some time to figure it out for himself."

"What do you say about the pictures in the paper? Does he have a new flame and how do you feel about that?"

"Marty, I'm a celebrity myself and I know how deceiving pictures can be. However, I don't read the papers. But whatsoever, about Tommy and a new girlfriend, I can just say that I wish him all good there is. He deserves it. And if this girl is making him happy, I'm all in for it. I and Tommy are over for quite some time now and there's nothing but a deep musical connection between us."

It physically hurt Jude to speak these words out loud. Because it was so far from the true as possible. They weren't over for long, although she had insisted on it, they hadn't been really over till 20 minutes ago when Jude had seen that photo. So the question in how far the photo got to her – it broke her heart all over again. But she couldn't really say that.

"Ok then, let's talk about your latest single. It was released last week and it's already in the charts on rank 2. What inspired you to this song and did you expect it to be so successful?"

Finally topic that wasn't as hurting as the one before. Except maybe that the song was about Tommy, like so many others.

"The song is about a girl, who loves a guy really deeply, but he's messed up and although she loves even the messed up side, she has to let go, because it's hurting her. She gives him one last chance, a chance to change, a chance to let her in. But she makes clear that she's on the edge and that she will leave if necessary. What inspired me exactly I don't know, but I can relate to this girl because I've been through different relationships before and without letting the other in there can be no relationship or friendship. I don't know what I expected for this song, but I can say that it's an amazing feeling to know I still got fans out there and that they still like my music. It's a feeling no one can describe."

"Deep thoughts and a story, that's what people like behind a song! Ok, the last question: I heard there'll be a concert next week?"

"Yeah, Diamond Records makes a concert here in Toronto, Shay will perform and some other artists and of course, lil' old me will be there too."

"Sounds like Toronto got something to be excited for. Now here's Jude with her latest single. Good-bye and thanks for your time, Jude."

"Thanks Marty, I'm glad I was here. And for this song I'll perform here, I would like to sing a new one I recently wrote. Today I woke up and felt like it. I want to dedicate it to someone who used to be very close to me. He'll know who I mean."

Jude stood up and adjusted the mic while the music began to play. Tears formed in her eyes while singing.

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That's it, hope you like it, next chapter there's gonna be the songlyrics and the big date... :) If you want to find out what happens next, review!


	8. 8 Girls just wanna have fun

Next chapter, yay... This story gets the most visitors and I really love writing it. Although I kinda got the feeling that everything I wrote in the last week is totally crap. But whatever...

Not even a week left of my summer holidays... :( it's really saad...

For all Jommyfans: please don't kill me. Jude's just a little outta her mind I guess. And he'll come back, eventually... :)

Enjoy reading and don't forget to review. Oh, and the lyrics are by myself...

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Mistaken – Chapter 8 – Girls just wanna have fun

Jude started to sing, her voice a little shaky, but it got better after the first lines. The song was getting to her, but she needed to get it out. And what was better than a radio station that got the biggest audience in that region of Canada?

_**It's about to finally end**_

_**It's something that's meant**_

_**Meant to happen**_

_**Meant to fall apart**_

_It really feels like this a stupid joke. All the time this forth and back with me and Tommy and now it's over for good. Can't help but think that I should have seen this coming. Maybe I did, maybe that was why I fought Tommy in the last weeks.__ So that it wouldn't hurt so much. Guess I failed._

_**Dreams are about to shatter hard**_

_**I don't know where to start again**_

_I gotta find a new start, although I got no __idea how I should get over this. I gotta let everything go, my hope, my dreams, what kept me going the last month._

_**This is my crash back in reality**_

_**I gotta forget what only felt real**_

_**I'm done with pretending**_

_**I'll stop living a lie that's never-ending**_

_I gotta give up hope, but how can I give up hope when it's everything to me? What's left for me in this life if Tommy's never gonna be in it again? I mean, I got friends, and I could keep on pretending everything's just fine, but I can't if I know he won't come back. I'm tired of pretending._

_**While it lasted it was nice what we had**_

_**But it's over now, time to move ahead**_

_**It's not enough anymore**_

_**I'm heading for the floor**_

_**I'm becoming numb to the pain**_

_**I realize that everything else is in vain**_

_Hoping won't get me anywhere, crying won't either. It can't be that hard finding something to live for, can it?_

_**This is my crash back in reality**_

_**I gotta forget what only felt real**_

_**I'm done with pretending**_

_**I'll stop live a lie that's never-ending**_

_I guess before finding something to hope for I gotta let go. And honestly, I got no idea how to let this go. How can I just stop dreaming about him? How can I accept this?_

_**There's nothing left to try**_

_**I gotta watch my dreams die**_

_**I don't think I'll be fine**_

_**No, no, not this time**_

_**So I'll try to move on**_

_**I won't**__** only go after what I want**_

She would try to move on, and this time if she made it, she wouldn't get herself in something like that with Tommy again. She would play it safe. That was a promise.

_**This is my crash back in reality**_

_**I gotta forget what only felt real**_

_**I'm done with pretending**_

_**I'll stop living a lie that's never-ending**_

_**It's too late to change **_

_**I can't stop or look back**_

_**I gotta reason now before**_

_**Doing anything to mess this up even more**_

_I can't change it anymore, maybe I couldn'__t ever. But I still got my music, my fans, my friends. I can do this, I have to. Because how would it look like when I break down because some guy left, with who I broke up long time ago? Oh my god, I think I'm going crazy, does anyone listen to myself?_

_**This is my crash back in reality**_

_**I gotta forget what only felt real**_

_**I'm done with pretending**_

_**Don't wanna live a lie that's never ending**_

_**Oooh, lies that are never-ending**_

_**Yeah I gotta stop pretending**_

The music played out and Marty was saying some things about the new song and introduced an other song which was next on the playlist. Then he said his good-bye to Jude and focused on his work again. Like in a trance Jude left the building, climbed in her car and started the engine. Then she just drove and kept on driving with no destination.

She was feeling totally lost. Since she had been fifteen and entered that contest there had been one constant in her life: Tommy. Her parents had left her after the marriage fell apart. Sadie had been with her all the time, but now she had Kwest and she wasn't there too. Somehow. G-Major had always been a second home to Jude and now she had lost it too. Along with G-Major she had lost SME. She still had Jamie, but it wasn't the same. They had talked and met in the last weeks, but it hadn't been as it used to. It was like there was some wall between them and neither of them was able to overcome it. Jamie had fallen in love with Zepplin, who worked with him at NBR. She had now Shay and Megan, but they couldn't replace everyone, not even speaking about Tommy.

It felt like everything was changing and there was nothing Jude could do, everybody moved on with their lives, only Jude was staying where she was. She liked how things had been. Before everything went wrong.

After some time Jude's cell ringed. She had thought the whole time about how much everything had changed, she had wallowed in memories and that call got her back into reality.

_Hard crash back in reality. Indeed._

She grabbed the cell which was in her purse, which laid on the front passenger seat. A few moments later she found it and accepted the call. Giving a damn about not being allowed to use cells while driving.

"Yeah?" She asked crumply. She had liked going back in time for some time. She didn't like being reminded that it was just temporary.

"Hey, it's me, your beloved producer."

"What's up Shay?"

"Why do you sound so grumpy? Something's wrong? I heard your interview today and you were great just like that song you sang. Just one thing bothered me. Why did I never hear about it before?"

"Oh come on, can't you just let it go? You said it yourself it was amazing, so what's your problem?"

"That you don't talk to me. You know I'm not really mad at you for singing this song. You're enough of an artist to know what's good and what's not. But you haven't been in the studio since Monday and being true you weren't there very long on Monday, just to tell me that you would take the day of. Since I'm your friend I'm worried about you!"

"So as far as I get it right you're not mad, you just feel neglected. I'm sorry but I've been busy last week. I'll see you Monday in the studio and I promise I'll stay there the whole day. Content now?"

"Jude, this isn't about me feeling unattended. I'm just worried. I heard about the whole Tommy thing."

"What did you hear exactly?" Jude asked, afraid that he knew somehow about that kiss.

"That Tommy left Tuesday and –coincidently- your isolation began Tuesday too. Anything you wanna tell me?"

"No, there's nothing I wanna tell you. It's like you said, a coincidence. I'm fine, I don't care where the hell Tommy is, I'm through with him and that for weeks already. You should really think better for excuses when you feel unattended next time. Maybe I'll actually believe you then. So if you excuse me now, I just arrived at home and since I got plans tonight I gotta get ready for I'll hang up now."

"Jude!"

"Bye, love ya too!" And with that she hung up, a soft smirk on her face.

But the smile vanished quickly when she thought of a certain person who was standing out because of his absence. The reason her friend had gotten worried about her in the first place.

Jude sighed. She couldn't get depressed right now all over again, after all she had a date in three hours.

It was her sixth drink tonight and Jude had been feeling dizzie after the fourth. Although she was on the best way to not remembering the evening in the morning, she had to admit that it had been a good night so far. If Jude hadn't been depressed before it would have been a perfect date. Johnny had picked her up and had been a real gentleman and very sweet. Then they had came to this club where a talented newcomer band from Seattle had a performance and everything had been pretty fine. Jude had the impression that Johnny tried to fill her up, but who was she to complain about? He was some hot guy who was wanting her and she was attracted to him, he was being a gentleman and the date he planned was wonderful. If she was lucky there might be a picture of them together in the morning paper. Not that she would suddenly be interested in the media's attention, but she couldn't help but wish for it. She wanted to make Tommy regret. Everything was about getting back at Tommy.

"Hey beautiful, what's gotten you all silent while I was getting new drinks for like one minute."

Beautiful- Johnny's pet name for Jude. She kinda liked it, because "babe" was her too cliché and "girl" was not acceptable ever again. Because only one guy was allowed to call her girl and that guy had just left her without a good-bye and he wouldn't come back. Not that Jude cared of course.

"Nothing. Everything's alright." Jude said smiling sweetly while taking her new drink from Johnny. The latter grinned, not noticing the sad tone Jude was talking with or he just didn't acknowledge it. But what he did notice was the problems Jude had with managing her motions and words. He couldn't help but grin at this, he wanted her badly and he didn't want any problems. After all she wanted it too, he was sure of that, but Jude was just a girl and girl were making everything complicated. He was doing her a favor in the end.

"Wanna leave? My hotel's not far from here." Johnny said like he had done a thousand times before. But he felt that it was somehow different with Jude than with the other girls, he actually kind of liked her and felt slightly bad about his way of getting her drunk and everything. But he would be good to her as soon as she was his official girlfriend, he was just... fastening things up.

"Why not? I'm up to having fun! I spend time not having fun way to much lately." Jude said slightly off, or well, better very off.

"Then let's go."

Jude was somehow aware what was happening, her subconscious knew something was wrong, but her mind didn't react. What was so wrong with having some fun after all? So what if it wasn't how she used to be? Nothing was how it used to be. Tommy left and had a new girlfriend, so why couldn't Jude have a new boyfriend?

_Girls just wanna have fun after all – especially drunken girls._


	9. 9 A day to remember

So tomorrow schoold starts, less than 24 hours :(... And I gotta get to a coordinator tomorrow BEFORE school to change something about my schedule and that means getting up early... :(... Well, this is my last update during the holidays... It's definitely not my best work, but not the worst either, I think. However, from now on I'll update my storys in order, ranking after how many reviews and how many visitors there are... So, if you want to read more, you gotta review... ;)

However, enjoy reading and review, please!

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Mistaken Chapter 9

The sunlight crept through the shutters, slowly dipping the room in twilight with many shades everywhere. Jude had been awake for far too long and now she was finally leaving the room with the literally first daylight. She walked down the hall like in trance, walked by the receptionist without even noticing his "good-morning", normally she would be angry with herself now, she hated snobs and divas. But this time she just strode out of the big, first-class (what else would be enough for Johnny?!) hotel and wandered around aimless. The only thing she wanted was to get as much space as possible between her and Johnny and his room.

_What have I done? Well, ok, I know what I've done, but how could I ever do this? I've slept with freaking Johnny D., I've became one of many once again, the same as with Tommy, just that this time he didn't even make me believe he'd changed. Stupid, stupid me._

She walked by a newspaper kiosk and decided to buy something to drink, she had a headache like hell from all the drinks she had the night before. Although she saw it as the deserved punishment for being a fool, she wanted to drink some water and would give everything for an aspirin.

"Hello, a bottle water please." Jude said, sounding pretty sore.

"Had a rough night?" The old man asked while giving the bottle to Jude.

"Yeah, could say so. If you want to put it in a nice way." Jude murmured absently while handing over the fitting amount of money. "Is there any chance that you might have an aspirin for me?" She asked the seller when he threw her a sympathetic glance. He looked mildly surprised, more that she asked than about the fact that she needed one of course.

"Lucky you, I have some in the back, wait a second." He told her friendly while turning around and searching through some stuff. Jude looked over the newspapers and spotted a way too familiar male on a title picture of some gossip paper. The subtitle was: "Tommy Quincy, the mystery man, ready to settle in his hometown?"

"Yeah, lucky, lucky me." Jude murmured sarcastically, suddenly only wanting to walk away from that kiosk and it's papers. The man gave Jude an aspirin pill, she thanked him quickly and walked away.

_Great, I have slept with Johnny for… what? Revenge? Well, I certainly could have done better, considering Tommy won't even know that I slept with him, most likely he wouldn't care anyway since he's ready to "finally settle". Like Tommy was ever ready._

Jude laughed bitterly, a terrible sound in her own ears; it was like the opposite a laugh was supposed to be, with the complete absence of joy.

_What now? Johnny probably won't show up again, he can get a new easy girl at every street corner and guys like him are usually only interested in having them "once". Just like Tommy in his old days. Wait, did I say old? Oh great, now I'm getting cynic. __Well, there's not much left of lil' ol' me aside from my cynics… Oh my god, I'm so pathetic._

Suddenly Jude turned around and walked quickly all the way back to the kiosk, buying the paper with Tommy on the front. So she knew it was stupid to buy it, but nothing what she now did could top what she did last night, so honestly: who cared?

Jude went straight home after having read about how happy Tommy looked on the pictures with the mysterious girl and in front of his home and stuff. Jude had become nauseous while reading all the lovey-dovey crap the press wrote about Tommy and his girl.

"This just plain sucks." Jude said to herself when she walked into the house, not expecting anyone to be there, because well, no one was ever there lately.

"Hello little sister. And what sucks?" Sadie said with a bright smile, coming out of the living room to greet her sister.

"Oh Sadie, you're home. Nothing, everything's fine." Jude said, knowing just too well that she was a terrible liar. But no one can blame her for trying, right?

"Juuude." Sadie said impatiently.

"Ok, so it's not nothing. But I don't wanna talk about it, ok?" Jude said and walked into the living room, letting Sadie behind.

Sadie sighed and turned to follow her sister. "No, it's not ok and you know that. I'm your big sister, I'm supposed to take care of you, but you gotta talk to me so I can do that."

"Well, since you been such a good sister lately I don't think I have to talk to you right now."

"What?"

"Sorry Sades, but you haven't been home in weeks and now you're coincidently here and want to play the perfect big sister? Not a chance, sorry."

"Ok, so I haven't been there much lately, the point is that I'm sorry and I came here to tell you and catch up. So now spill, you know you want to and I'll give you some advice, like in old times."

Jude looked at her sister disbelievingly, she couldn't believe that Sadie actually believe she would just forgive her for being absent for weeks. It's not like she was blaming Sadie for not being there, but Sadie couldn't honestly expect Jude to now tell her everything that bothered her.

"Thanks" Jude said annoyed. "But no thanks. Then she grabbed the TV guide and went upstairs in her room. Of course she wasn't left alone like she wanted to. No, Sadie was following her a few minutes later, having two cups of coffee in her hands.

"I got coffee for you, baby sis. Look, I know I haven't been here, but please don't shut me out. I promise I'll be around more often!" Sadie said while Jude was taking her coffee and sipping the hot liquid. She was addicted to coffee and Sadie knew that, and Jude knew that Sadie knew that just too well.

"Hey, you know I won't leave you alone until you tell me and we both know that you want to be alone and write a song about whatever happened to get it out of your system, so… Spill!"

"Ok, ok. I ran into Johnny D. a bit more than a week ago. He asked me to go with him to this G-Major party and I did go with him, so maybe you've seen him there? No, well, you know how he looks I think. However, last night we went on a first real date and I got drunk and then we... you know… and this morning I woke up in his hotel room." Jude explained quickly, just wanting to get over with it. But when she had finished she felt slightly better, knowing that Sadie would comfort her every moment. After all she was her big sister and had to be there for her, right?

But Sadie just sat there and starred at Jude, not able to say anything. After a while she just mumbled: "Oh."

"Oh? Oh?! That's all you got to say? Gee, thanks, now I feel so much better. When your content now, would you please leave?!" Jude said annoyed and ashamed of herself.

"What do you want me to say Jude?" Sadie asked, still shocked but angry now too, she didn't understand how Jude could do something like that and now her little sis was even dejecting her.

"Something. Just something. Because you know what they say, talking means judging but silence means having judged. But whatever. You said if I told you, you'd leave. I did my part, so now, please, leave me alone." Jude whispered, tears in her eyes. Inside she screamed for Sadie to not leave, for Sadie to hold her in her arms and telling her everything would be alright again.

But Sadie stood up and left Jude alone.

_Never fails to disappoint, doesn't she, my dear big sis? _

_And there we go all cynic again…_

Jude groaned and threw herself onto the bed, hiding under the covers.

Tommy was leaving the clinic where his mother lived now. She hadn't recognized him this time. He didn't know what hurt more, her not recognizing him or her doing so and yelling at him. Her condition was getting worse and Tommy had come to take care of selling the house. After Tristan had vanished into thin air Tommy's sister, Nora, had called Tommy to come back and help her with selling the house.

_Who would have thought that Tristan would have enough some day and just disappear? I certainly didn't. Nora didn't see it coming either, although she's now blaming herself for not seeing the "signs". But truth is that Tristan was unpredictable and we all knew that. Whatever, two more days, then the house is sold and I'm not needed any longer. Only question is what I will do then. Nora will go back to wherever she lives now, she had broken up with our "family" not long after I did, just with the difference that she only came by __once in five years, but never told us where she lived or what she was doing. Maybe she has been smarter than me, or she just was more of a coward, who knows? However, I still gotta figure out what to do next. To be true I ran away too, just like Tristan did. When I go back now, I have no clue what I will find. I haven't heard anything from Jude since the G-Major party. Haven't talked to her since I told her I loved her. Haven't seen her since she kissed that cocky bastard. Haven't stopped thinking about her ever since. Damn it, I screwed up, I should just forget her, she won't take me back anyways. I left her once and she forgave me, now I left again this time right after I told her I love her and I don't even have a good excuse, because if I'm honest, Nora could have done all of this on her own. But stupid me needed to get away and as always it was just the wrong thing to do._

Tommy's cell ringed and he was wrenched out of his depressive thoughts. Kwest.

"Yeah?" Tommy answered the call.

"Tommy? Finally! What in hell do I have to do to get you on the phone? You ignored me ever since you left, damn it!"

"Sorry man, had to figure things out first by myself, you know?"

"No, Tommy, actually, I don't. Because you won't tell me. I still don't know why you left in the first place! What I do know is where you are, wanna know why? Because it's been plastered on every damn paper. You and Nora, happy together, Tommy Q and his new mysterious girlfriend."

"Girlfriend? Oh they really got no idea." Tommy chuckled, thinking about how stupid the press had to be to still not have figured out that Nora was his sister.

"I'm glad you're laughing about it, but I got a feeling like a certain rockstar won't like these pictures." Kwest reasoned and made Tommy successfully feel guilty.

"Damn it." Tommy cursed. He hadn't thought of Jude and what she must think yet.

"Damn right, man. I hate to break it to you, but this time you really messed up. I guess you haven't read the tabloids, so you probably don't know that Johnny D. told an interviewer yesterday that he was going on a date with Jude Harrison."

"I thought something like this was coming already. She kissed him on that G-Major party if you remember." Tommy said sadly.

"Stop pitying yourself and get the hell back here. I don't know what's going on, but I don't wanna see Jude get hurt even more by this wannabe star, so get your ass back here ASAP and beg for her forgiveness."

"But-"

"No buts. Come back and don't you dare to ignore me again. I gotta go, some people gotta work because they can't just quit their job." Kwest added and hung up.

Tommy starred at his cell for a few moments. "Wow" He murmured. Kwest had never talked to him like that before. Well maybe when he had started trying out some hard drugs, or when he married Portia or when he had crashed down after Angie's death, but he could count these rare occasions with the fingers of one hand and he knew Kwest for his whole life.

_Guess I really messed up this time, although I knew that kind of already, this is just the confirmation. But even if I wanted to, I can't go back right now, Nora needs me and the house will take some days till it's sold and then I gotta find out where Nora lives, because I can't let her disappear again. I just can't. And until then I have some time to figure out what to do afterwards._

Tommy's cell went off again and when he checked the caller-ID it said: Nora. He accepted the call and grinned softly.

"Hey sis…"

Jude was sitting in her bedroom, she ran out of tears an hour ago and now she was just starring into the air, trying not to think about anything and she even succeeded for some time. She hadn't talked to anyone except Sadie and she felt cheap and like dirt, she felt like a slut and a bad role model for her fans, because who just slept with a notorious playboy after the first damn date, and she had been beyond drunk too! Suddenly her cell ringed and interrupted her dreamy state.

"Yeah?" She answered the call impolitely and absolutely not caring.

"Jude, it's me, I was worried when you weren't there this morning. Why did you leave without saying goodbye?" A too familiar voice asked.

"Hey Johnny. I just… I'm sorry. Something came up and I didn't want to wake you." She lied, not having the guts to say the truth. Besides, she was wondering why he called anyway, he had already gotten what he wanted, didn't he?

"Oh, ok. No problem. I just wanted to say that last night was great and I wanted to ask if you want to go out with me again."

"Again? You want… you want a relationship with me?" Jude asked perplex.

"Yeah, that's the reason I'm calling, indeed. What did you think?" Johnny asked laughing.

"I don't know, I was wondering." Jude answered sheepishly. He wanted a relationship?! Then everything wasn't as bad as she thought right?

_There's nothing wrong with sleeping with your boyfriend. After the first date is maybe a little bit soon, but he's really nice and after all we even kissed BEFORE the first date, so…_

"I'd love to go out with you again." She said grinning and now laughing too at her stupidity and out of relief.

"Well, now that we agreed on that, when do you have time?"

"I don't really know, next week I got my first concert with Diamond Records and so I'll have to work quite a bit till then, but you can come by the day after tomorrow, maybe around 6 p.m.?" Jude proposed, hoping that Johnny wouldn't want to go out of the house, because she knew Shay well enough to know that he would let her work pretty hard the next few days so she could make up for the work she had missed the week before.

"Alright, that's fine with me. I'll just have to reschedule a dinner with a director, but that shouldn't be a problem." Johnny trailed off, obviously thinking about the rescheduling.

"Oh, ehm Johnny, you don't have to postpone your plans for me, we'll just find another evening and it'll be fine!" Jude assured him, but he didn't let her talk him out of it. He told her that she was more important than work in this case, after all she was now his girlfriend. Jude said good-bye happily. Before she had worried all the time that she was a cheap slut, but now she had an awesome boyfriend who put her before work and she didn't have to worry about being a slut or a bad role model. The only thing she had to worry about was work and maybe about what she should wear to that date.

_And since we're official now, Tommy will hear about it too and I hope he'll regret leaving. But if he comes back he's too late, I'm unavailable. Something better couldn't happen. Even if he comes back and corners me again, now I got a boyfriend, so there's nothing to discuss and he can't just kiss me again or tell me he loves me and confuse me so completely._

_

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_I thought I'd write something about Tommy too, for all who are Jommy fans, well, so to say for everyone ;)... Wondering if Tommy will come bakc in the next chapter?? Review to find out... :)


	10. 10 Screw you Tommy

Ok, here's the next update, yay... First days in school suck, especially when it's so damn hot outside that you're feeling like ice cream in the desert! And we're supposed to be working... but how if I'm allowed to ask! Whatever... I got this update ready since I didn't want to do homework today... :D I hope you like it... Tommy's back... :)

Enjoy reading and review, please...

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Mistaken – Chap 9 – Screw you Tommy

Jude looked around, she was backstage at her concert, only five minutes and she would have to go outside and start performing her first song. It was her first concert for Diamond Records and the first time again on stage in far too long, the last time she had been performing a song on a stage had been together with Tommy at his hometown's festival. Something she didn't want to think about, it seemed like an eternity ago.

"Hey, are you alright?" Shay asked from behind. She turned around and smiled.

"Yeah, of course. I was never one to get stage fright, you know. Except for the Instant Star contest maybe. It's just, I haven't been out on stage for quite some time and I've never done a concert before with… without Tommy, you know?" Jude said, feeling slightly embarrassed at how weak she sounded.

"It's gonna be ok, don't worry. He'll come back." Shay tried to comfort her and put his arm around her shoulder.

"Just that I'm not available anymore." Jude murmured while laying her head on his shoulder.

"You know what I think of your new boyfriend." Shay said, cursing himself for starting this fight again, but he just couldn't back off. He hated that Johnny guy, he was way too… not good enough for Jude. But as always Jude would snap at him every moment and ignore every little thing he said about Johnny not being good for her.

"Yeah I do. And maybe you're right." Jude whispered, the last sentence more to herself than to Shay, but he heard it none the less.

"What?"

"Nothing. I just don't know. I'm confused I guess." Jude said quickly, trying to get away from Shay. She didn't know why she had been stupid enough to this. It would just tip Shay off that there was something not ok and Jude really didn't want to talk about Johnny.

"No it's not nothing. What did he do?" Shay insisted, now really worried. Something was terribly wrong, and he knew it. He just didn't know why she didn't want to tell him about it. Since she had forgiven him they had been close friends and they hadn't had any secrets between each other. That she wasn't telling him something now was worrying him even more.

"Ok, I'll tell you. You won't let me get away with not telling anyways." Jude gave in.

"Oh you know me so well. So, spill!"

Jude looked at her watch and smiled. "Sorry, can't got a concert to perform for. Tell ya later!" And then she rushed off on stage and Shay couldn't get rid of the feeling that she would try to avoid him all night. Great.

Two songs later Shay got to talk to Jude backstage again. She groaned when he appeared in front of her, but she knew she had to face him at some point. He looked at her in a demanding way and Jude began to tell what happened without needing any further signs.

"Ok, ok. Two days ago at night, it was pretty late and Johnny stopped by. I opened the door and he just came in, I could smell he was totally drunk. I told him to better get to sleep on the couch or something, but he didn't want to. He wanted to have sex, I told him I didn't want to and tried to get him on the couch, then he slapped me in the face. Fifteen minutes later or so I finally had him on the couch and he slept in. This morning he didn't remember a thing and when I told him he said he was sorry and that it would never happen again. Well, last night it did. He didn't remember anything again and this time I didn't told him. I just… don't know what to do, you know. He was really aggressive last night and said some mean things." Jude trailed of, not wanting to remember the previous night word for word.

"Where did he hurt you?" Shay asked, rage filling his voice. How could Johnny dare to touch and hurt Jude?

"It's nothing really, it'll just leave a little bruise on my right shoulder, maybe. But hopefully not. He didn't want to hurt me, you know. He was just… drunk. He wasn't himself. It's my fault anyways, I shouldn't have opened the door, or better, I shouldn't have let him go away and get drunk in the first place. He could die when he drives through the town every night totally drunk." Jude rambled, not sure how to put these scared and guilt feelings into words. Shay took Jude at the shoulders and shook her midly.

"Don't you ever even think that again! It's his fault, he's is to blame! Not you, damn it! You could call the police, do you know that?!" Shay said still pissed off by what she had told him and even more at the thought that Jude was blaming herself for what that asshole did to her. Then Shay suddenly noticed that Jude winced painfully and he removed his hands from her shoulders, remembering that Johnny had hurt her there, and Jude looked terribly relieved.

"This son of a bitch." Shay hissed through gritted teeth, looking out on the front row, seeing Johnny sitting there and talking to his neighbor.

"Shay! Don't do or say anything to him, please. He didn't mean for me to get hurt, he loves me. He even introduces me to different directors and I got an offer for a main role in a new film, together with him because he only signed with the condition that they offered me the female main character. That's so sweet of him. He's the best boyfriend I can wish for and I'm able to deal with him getting drunk myself, don't worry." Jude assured her best friend.

"Hey you two. Am I interrupting something? Because I just wanted to see how my girlfriend's doing." Johnny cut Shay off who wanted to say something. Jude looked at Johnny and smiled.

"No, Shay has something to take care of anyways. What song do you want me to do next?" She asked Johnny, making Shay clear that he should leave her and Johnny alone. Shay looked at her disbelievingly, but he left eventually. It was her concert and he would talk to her later when Johnny wasn't around.

"How about "The Best Worst Thing"? Your fans love that one and then, you told me about that new song you wrote, didn't you?" Johnny proposed, putting his arms around her waist and pulling her to him tentatively.

"Mmhm" Jude sighed comfortably. "I'll do "The Best Worst Thing" next. About that new one, I didn't check it with Shay yet, and I already played once without asking him, I promised not to do it again."

"Come on Jude, this are your fans out there, they want to hear new stuff, not just your old. Besides, I invited some friends of mine, one is a famous director for great music films, imagine he would offer you a role! Then you'll be a film star too, just like me!"

"I don't know. I just want to sing, I mean I like acting, but…" Jude began, not sure what to say.

"Give it a try, do it for your fans! They'll love you in the movies! Plus we could spent more time together and take only parts in the same films, you know?"

"Ok, I'll think about it." Jude promised, adoring how sweet he was and how caring.

"Alright, I'll go back to my place and I'll wait for this awesome, mindblowing new hit of yours!" Leo announced and kissed her. Then he walked away, leaving Jude starring after him, torn about what to do on stage.

"Jude, you're on now!" A man said and Jude nodded understanding. Then she walked on the stage and took the mic.

"Hey guys! Do you have fun? I'll be now doing my latest single: The Best Worst Thing. I'd like to dedicate it to my ex, he'll know who I mean!" Then the music started and Jude began performing, the part she love the most about being a rock star. While she sang she scanned the crowd for familiar faces, throwing smiles at Leo who was cheering in the first row. When her glance went over the third row on the right side she suddenly froze. HE was here, right in this hall. Sitting there, watching her with his new girlfriend. Tommy and his skank, the girl from the tabloids.

_Seems like the media got one thing right for a change. Well, then my song's reaching the right person, isn't it?_

Jude smiled sweetly and continued her performance without the slightest hitch, her eyes glued to her ex-producer. It was like back in the studios of G-Major, Jude standing there, singing her song, pouring out her feelings. Tommy sitting there, so near and yet so far, with his newest flame, back then it had been Sadie, now this girl.

The last beat died away slowly. Jude raised the mic again to her mouth and addressed the fans, but one of them especially.

"So, this was my latest song. I'm sure my ex listened and I hope he and his new girlfriend listened very carefully, so they can learn from my experiences. The next song is something I never performed before and I haven't even recorded it yet. Shay, please don't kill me!" The audience laughed and cheered, but Jude wasn't finished yet. "The person I wrote this for is listening right now and I just want this certain someone to know that I'm better off now and I wanna say thank you for opening my eyes! Here it goes: Since you been gone."

Here's the thing

We started out friends

It was cool but it was all pretend

Yeah yeah

Since you been gone

You dedicated you took the time

Wasn't long till I called you mine

Yeah yeah

Since you been gone

And all you'd ever hear me say

Is how I pictured me with you

That's all you'd ever hear me say

But since u been gone

I can breathe for the first time

I'm so moving on

Thanks to you now I get

What I want

Since u been gone

How can I put it

You put me on

Even fell for that stupid love song

Yeah yeah

since you been gone

How come I never hear you say

I just wanna be with you

Guess you never felt that way

Yeah yeah

Since you been gone

Chorus

You had your chance you blew it

Out of sight out of mind

Shut your mouth I just can't take it

Again and again and again

Jude finished the song after she had repeated the chorus two more times. The whole song she had barely stopped looking right into the piercing blue eyes that still haunted her in her dreams. She wouldn't admit it, but she wasn't as over Tommy as she wanted everyone, expecially Tommy, to believe. Truth to be told, she had written the song long ago, after he had left he had left her on their first date. She had been through an angry phase and wrote most parts of this song, the rest she just added after he had called her poison.

When Jude went backstage after the song Johnny was already awaiting her. Jude hadn't even noticed that he had left his seat at the end of her song, and she felt slightly guilty for not paying any attention to her boyfriend. But fortunately he hadn't noticed that she had been distracted.

"That was unbelievable Jude! You rocked the stage!" He told her and kissed her.

Tommy was sitting on his seat, not believing what had just happened. The minute Jude's eyes had met his he had stopped breathing. He had wanted to smile and show her that he was back for good, but then she had just continued singing, looking at him like there was nothing special. She had looked angry and only then he had remembered that she was singing this song about him, telling the world that he was the worst thing that ever happened to her.

_Well not the worst, but the best worst thing isn't really something good, is it?_

He had asked this question himself a thousand times after hearing her song for the first time.

When Jude had began talking about her next song he had known that it was about him and had been afraid and anxious at the same time. When the song had finished he wasn't able to breath anymore. So he had really messed everything up, she was moving on and had finally realized that he wasn't worth her and no good at all.

But that couldn't be the end. He had come home to tell her he loved her and to win her back no matter what it would cost and this should have been it? He hadn't even had a chance to talk.

_Damn it. I know I haven't deserved a chance to talk, but this can't just be it! I love her and I'll always do. I gotta talk to her._

"Nora, I gotta go and see someone, are you ok with waiting here?" He asked his sister who was sitting right next to him. She threw him a knowing look and nodded. He smiled weakly and got up and headed for the backstage entrance.

He didn't need too long to find Jude since he knew her well enough to know where she usually was backstage during a concert. But when he finally saw her it felt like he was stabbed in his heart. There she was, beautiful as always with her short-cut blonde hair, but she was making out with some guy that wasn't Tommy. Although he wished he was in the place of that guy.

Suddenly it hit Tommy like a train, Jude really had moved on. She had meant the song, she was really over him and not looking back once. He had told her often enough he was no good for her, just like she had said in her song "The Best Worst Thing" and now it seemed like she really believed in his own words.

_Be careful what you wish for. Indeed. I guess I should get going before she sees me. She's better off without me and who am I to try and destroy her relationship with this guy? I say I love her and I want her to be happy, and now it's time to prove it. I gotta back off and watch her be happy, although it's not with me. How did she sing it? I had my chance and I blew it._

Tommy smiled sadly, he looked as broken as he felt. But instead of going over to her and talk like he had planned to, he turned around and went back the way he came, determined to let Jude have the happy and uncomplicated life she deserved. A tear fell from his eyes, but he didn't turn around.

Well at least he wouldn't have if Shay hadn't blocked his way suddenly. Tommy tried to walk around him, not wanting to say anything because Jude was still near enough to hear them if they'd fight. But Shay refused to let him go away. Instead Shay motioned for Tommy to stay where he was, hidden behind some kind of cupboard. Then Shay walked straight over to Jude and Johnny. Tommy held his breath and listened to the conversation.

"Shorty, sorry to interrupt, but I gotta talk to you. Now." Shay said loud and clear not bothering to even look like he was sorry. Tommy imagined how Jude and Johnny pulled apart and how they, or at least Johnny, glared at Shay.

"Ehm, right. Ok. Johnny, would you mind…?" Jude mumbled embarrassed.

Tommy heard something like an "ok" And heard steps walking away.

"Jude, what do you think you're doing?" Shay asked seriously upset.

"I'm sorry Shay, I know I promised to check every song with you before…"

"I'm not talking about that damn song! I'm talking about going back to that fool!" Shay cut her off.

"I told you this is none of your business. He didn't meant to hurt me damn it! He LOVES me and wouldn't ever leave or hurt me." Jude said defensively, sounding somewhat hollow in Tommy ears. But Tommy had other worries than the sound of her voice.

_Johnny hurt her? How? What are they talking about? Fuck, I want to know what's going on here!_

"He beat you when he was drunk. More than one time! I wasn't a fan of Tommy's but at least he would have never hurt you! You can't stay with Johnny, Jude. Not if you want to have any pride left in the end. He doesn't deserve you!" Shay was now yelling, obviously trying to knock some sense in Jude. Tommy was now furious as well, how could this guy dare to touch his girl?

"Did you know that Tommy is in the audience tonight?" Shay suddenly asked, the question seeming to completely be out of order. Tommy didn't hear anything, but he assumed Jude had nodded, because of Shay's next word:

"Well, then I guess that's the reason for your new song, right? Then would you please explain me why you're lying to your fans?" Shay interrogated further.

"What are you talking about?" Jude asked confused.

"Well, I already knew that song. I was flipping to one of your old journals a few weeks ago and I found most parts of that song you just sang, but it was date about two years ago. Got an explanation?"

Tommy's mind was working on high-speed. Two years ago… He had left Jude on their first date two years ago, this song must have been from then. Suddenly he was enormously relieved because that meant that there was still hope that Jude would forgive him after all.

"Ok, ok, you're right. I wrote it after he stood me up on our first date and left without explanation. But the point is that I want him to leave me alone. I don't wanna see his face ever again. He told me he fucking loved me on that stupid G-Major party and we even kissed and the next day, he's gone without any explanation. I'm not doing this any longer. I'm going to get over him and I'm going to stay with Johnny. You're right, I have to talk to him about what happened. It won't happen again, I'm sure, like I said before it was partially my fault too."

Tommy couldn't hold back any longer and came out of his hiding place. Jude's eyes widened at his sight and he felt kind of satisfied that she wasn't ice cold or pretending he didn't matter to her anymore. He walked over to the two, never breaking eye contact with Jude.

"Shay, would you mind giving us some privacy? And please don't let this bastard come anywhere near her, because if you do I'll kill him." Tommy ordered in a untypical calm voice, still starring right into Jude's eyes. Shay left the room without another word and the two were alone.

"Tommy." Jude whispered after a moment like she still couldn't believe it. He felt a grin spreading on his face, but restrained from letting it.

"Jude, listen. I'm sorry for leaving, my sister needed me and I was angry about you kissing Johnny right after I told you I loved you and so I did the stupidest thing possible and just left. I'm sorry for everything, but I meant it when I told you that I love you." Tommy told her in an honest voice. Jude was now quickly recovering from the shock of seeing Tommy right in front of her and him talking to her.

"So, you did, how nice to know, really. I'm really glad you came and told me this. But now you should probably get back to your girlfriend out there before the tabloids get an photo from us two, and we wouldn't want that, do we?"

"Well, Nora wouldn't care since she's my sister." Tommy said grinning.

"Your sister?"

"Yep."

"Fine, whatever. I got fans waiting for me. What do you want from me?" Jude asked impatiently.

"I want a second chance and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get one." Tommy replied sincerely, trying to convey the same message with his eyes too. "Because I want to prove you that I really did and do and will forever love you."

"You should have thought about your feelings before you left – again." Jude said, not looking him in the eyes this time. She had tears in them and didn't want him to take them as a sign that he had still a chance. Because he didn't.

"You kissed him. It hurt me. I reacted wrong, I know that, but I was really hurt too!" Tommy tried to explain why he left, but it came out totally wrong and he felt that even before she said her next words:

"So you were hurt Tommy? Oh poor you! What do you think how I felt when you just gave up on us in that cell in New Brunswick? Or when you told me straight in my face that I was poison? Or when Kwest told me you left again and that he wouldn't expect you to come back, ever? But you know what Tommy? Screw you! You say you were hurt? Well then go back into the hole that you came from and sulk a little bit more, you're so good at it!" Jude hissed upset. How could he dare to blame it now on her?

"Jude, I-" Tommy began, but he was cut off.

"Spare me Tommy. Save it for someone who actually believes you. Because I don't, not anymore. I got a song to perform, so if you'd excuse me…" Jude said and walked away, leaving Tommy standing there like a wet puppy.

She performed an old song of hers, "Fade to Black" and left the concert afterwards immediately, successfully avoiding Tommy, Shay and Johnny.

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You know the drill:

As usual, if you want a quick update: **review**... If you like the chapter: **review**, if you hated it: **review**... ok, I think I got all possibilities covered, haven't I? ;)


	11. 11 A perfect date and a scandalous blog

Ok, here's the next update. I hope you'll like it. Not my best through, but it's stressful in school already, it's getting serious now, and all teachers tell us how this next one year and an half will be sooo important and stuff... School sucks...

Anyways, enjoy reading and don't forget to review, right now I can use anything that makes me smile even more. I hate school. Standing up early, having homework with no end... I just hate it... ;)

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Mistaken – Chapter 11

Jude was sitting in her favorite bar. She had been here the first time a few days ago when Johnny had hit her for the first time. She had come here after Johnny had finally fallen asleep and she had downed a few drinks until she had been drunk enough to stop crying. Today she was wearing just like back then a wig with blonde long hair and dark sunglasses. The only difference to her other visits was that this time she had called Megan to meet her in the bar. It was only a matter of minutes until she'd arrive so Jude was downing another shot, just to be sure.

"Hey, I'm here. Sorry it took me so long. So, what's the emergency?" Megan asked out of breath when she sat down next to Jude.

"An emergency? Did I say that? I was just overreacting, sorry. Everything's fine." Jude babbled, with a fake grin. "Everything's just perfect. Tommy's back, you know. With his sister. They were at my concert. He said he's sorry for everything. Isn't that great?"

"What? Tommy's back and he actually had the nerves to talk to you?" Megan questioned disbelievingly and stunned.

"Yes, he has, or had. Right after Shay got rid of Johnny Tommy was suddenly there. Strange coincidence, don't you think?" Jude continued, motioning to the barkeeper to bring her another glass.

"Jude, I think you got enough for today." Megan began and took the new drink from Jude's hands.

"No, I haven't had even closely enough. I still can remember what happened." Jude pouted and reached for her drink but Megan put it out of Jude's reach.

"Jude, I thought we had talked this through already! You're over Tommy, you two are done. Besides, aren't you with Johnny now?"

"Johnny, right, my boyfriend. He's perfect. And he really loves me. He actually says it to me and he hasn't stood me up on our first date. And he never dated my sister, did he? He's perfect, isn't he?" Jude rambled on and on and Megan just shook her head at her friend. It was so like Jude to get into this situation because of Tommy.

"I'll take you over to my place and there you'll sleep first, and about the Tommy-matter, I'll take care of it. He won't bother you again." Megan promised the drunk Jude with a grim and evil grin.

"What are you taking care of? Me or Tommy?" Jude giggled. "But don't let him go away again, yeah? Everything, just don't make him leave again. HE can't leave me again. Please." Jude began crying out of the blue and couldn't stop until they had arrived at Megan's flat. There Jude crashed on the couch and fell asleep after a few seconds.

The next morning Jude went home at 10 a.m. she had already taken three aspirins and had been drinking like five cups of coffee and she was actually starting to feel pretty good again. Like the headache, she had when she had woken up, had never been there.

She climbed out of her car and searched in her purse for the keys while walking to the door. When she was on the first step she looked up and stopped in her motions. She was seeing red, everything in front of her was red. The whole porch was full with red roses. Even around the door knob were some roses.

"Tommy?" Jude whispered totally stunned and speechless.

"Who's Tommy and why would he send you roses?" Johnny's playfully angry voice asked from behind. Jude spun around and faced her smiling boyfriend. She smiled back happily and kissed him softly.

"No one you need to worry about. Just someone who has a lot of apologizing to do." Jude said and kissed him again, this time with more passion.

"Good to know. I would hate to blow this day off. And believe, you'd hate it too, especially if it was just for some stupid boy."

"But I thought you were busy today." Jude frowned, still not getting what was going on.

"Well, I am. And so are you. I'm here to kidnap you right now and right here." Johnny laughed at her stunned face. He loved how she always was so innocent and how her face gave all her emotions away.

"Look, this is all really sweet. And no one has ever made such an effort for me, and I really love you for that, but I promised Shay to be in the studio this week, especially since this stupid TV-Show interview is tomorrow. And I didn't get to talk to him yesterday after the concert, so I gotta go, although I want nothing more but spending the day with you." Jude said pleading, her arms around Johnny's neck and her lips only a hand long away from his.

"I already thought that you'd say something like this, so I already talked to Shay days ago and I even talked to that strange guy who's running the Diamond-Records studio over here. You're free to go. Expect if you want to go to the studio, because then… well, then you're not free to go." Johnny grinned at Jude, how she opened her mouth and no words came out.

"You're speechless? I'll remember this day forever, I made Jude Harrison speechless. Unbelievable."

"Oh shut up, you're a bad, bad guy, did you know that?" Jude asked and they kissed again. Jude broke away for a moment. "Oh, but don't worry, I know that you're a softie deep inside!" Jude grinned and kissed him again, not letting him say anything.

Half an hour later Johnny and Jude climbed out of his limo, he was holding his hands from behind in front of her eyes, so that she couldn't see a thing and had to let him guide her.

"So, mystery boy, just tell me what's going on? Where are you taking?"

"Don't ruin the surprise, we're nearly there. I promise." Johnny said in a teasing sing sang voice.

"Oh come on, you're talking like we're on a travel to a place I've never been! We're still in Toronto, I know that much." Jude pleaded, dying to know what was happening. She loved surprises and found it indescribable sweet of Johnny to think of something like that, but she hated waiting for the big surprise.

"Are we in an elevator or something? Oh god, this is a really strange feeling when you can't see." Jude chuckled nervously; she had felt a shock rushing through her when she suddenly felt them moving up.

"Sorry I didn't warn you, babe. Won't happen again, promise." Johnny whispered in her ear and everything was forgotten and forgiven in a split second.

"Ok, we're there. Open your eyes beautiful!"

Jude opened her eyes and her jaw dropped. She knew they were on the roof of some sky scratcher in Toronto, but she it sure as hell wasn't looking like that. Everywhere around them were flowers and little trees, looking like a jungle. And at some spots you could still see the city through it. It looked surreal and totally amazing, like in a dream. In the middle laid a picnic blanket, covered with a basket and some things were already put out of it, but the top of a bottle of champagne was looking out of it.

"It's beautiful, amazing… Johnny, how did you do that?" Jude asked struggling for words to describe her feelings.

"I did it for you. Know when we watched that pictures in this travel agency? You said you always wanted to be in a jungle, but you'd probably miss the city. This is your personal jungle with the city, just like you wanted. I rented the roof of this building, so you can go here any time you want. I even got a yard boy, who'll take care of the flowers, plants and trees. So you can just enjoy the view."

"This is so… unbelievable. Johnny, you're the best boyfriend a girl can dream of!" Jude said still impressed while Johnny was leading her to the blanket.

A few hours later Johnny was dropping off Jude in front of her house.

"Are you sure you'll be ok alone? I could go and get you some aspirin for that headache of yours!" Johnny offered sounding worried. Jude got a bad feeling for lying to him and feinging a headache, but she couldn't go back now.

"Now, it's fine, I'll just lay down a bit and it'll be ok. This day was just perfect and everything was really sweet of you, Johnny. I'm sorry I got to cut it short." Jude apologized and looked at him with pleading eyes.

"No, it's no problem. It's your big day tomorrow, wouldn't want to mess this up. Good night, babe!" Johnny said understanding and kissed her good-bye, then he watched her going back to the house and going in, only then he drove away.

When she walked in the house she had a smile on her face. Johnny had been so sweet, charming and romantic even.

_He has made such an effort, just to let me have a day off. He's really the best boyfriend I could wish for. So he hit me once or twice, but he was drunk then, that wasn't really him. He's so sweet and understanding and he really loves me. Why can't I just love him back? And why couldn't Tommy stay away for good this time? Now everything's just so complicated all over again!_

Jude walked into her room and grabbed her notebook, clicking on her internet block, viewing the latest fan mail. Something she always did when she wanted to get her mind of something. It was always cheering her up when she read all those sweet and nice mails, telling her to keep on and how much they adored her.

When Jude was reading the first new mail, she was surprised and taken aback. Why would someone write that to her? She shook her head and read again, but the content didn't change and it was still what she had just read before:

**Dear Jude, I'm a big fan of yours and I so love you and Johnny together! He's worth you! Quite the opposite to Little Tommy Q, he's an ass, you're totally right. I so laughed when I read what you wrote.**

"What I wrote?" Jude murmured loud. She hadn't written anything in months and especially not about Tommy. She hurried back to the main page and clicked on her last entry.

"What the fuck is that?" She whispered totally shocked.

**Tom****my Quincy might look like a hotshot record producer but in truth he's just an insecure little boy who thinks he's a fraud.**

Jude couldn't believe what she was seeing. She never wrote that, she'd never do something like that. She wouldn't even think something like that. Ok, so maybe she had when Tommy had told her she was poison or when he had left again, but she'd never write it in her blog.

Megan. She was the only one that ever heard Jude saying words like that out loud. But she wouldn't do this, would she? She wouldn't betray Jude's trust, right?

_Guess I'll have to find out. And afterwards I'll have to find Tommy. Great, just what I needed when I asked for some time for myself to figure __things out._

Jude stood up and left the house, heading for Megan's flat.

"Hey, Megan. Can I come in for a second?" Jude asked when Megan opened the door.

"Yeah, sure! What were you doing all day? I tried to reach you, wanted to hang out a little." Megan said while Jude was coming in, casually, like nothing was wrong at all. For a moment Jude thought that maybe, she was crazy for thinking Megan would do something like that. She was her best friend at this point of time and if Jude told her that she was suspecting her it could ruin everything.

"Hello, earth to Jude? Are you even listening?" Megan asked with an amused smile.

"Sorry, Megan. It's just strange right now. I came back from my date with Johnny and when I checked my fan mail I saw an blog that I sure as hell didn't write, insulting Tommy. I just got no idea who could have done this. Do you?" Jude asked finally after a little pause, watching Megan closely. Megan looked at her nervously and then avoided eye contact.

"Maybe."

"Maybe?"

"Yeah, you know, maybe I've done it. Today, after you came back with me from that bar. You logged yourself in for some reason I can't remember, and when you were asleep I looked at the notebook saw it and when I thought about how devastated you were, just because of that guy, well I thought it was better this way. After all you said what I wrote yourself, just that you didn't had the nerve to put it in the net. Now it's out and Tommy'll probably leave you alone. It's better this way, believe me! You can't get back together with him."

"Oh, I can't? And you just decided that? Without even asking me? Megan, you're supposed to be my friend, not my mother!" Jude said, getting more furious with every word. She couldn't believe Megan actually did this. "What were you thinking? You know what? I don't wanna know? I don't need friends like you right now. Besides, I decide with whom I am and with whom I'm not. I decide that, no one else."

"Jude, I'm sorry. Let's just forget it, it won't happen again, I promise. I-" Megan tried to calm her down, rambling.

"No Megan, I won't just forget it. This is something I can't just forget. You betrayed my trust. You betrayed our friendship. I don't wanna see you right now. I can't believe you actually did this! I'm leaving right now and you better not show up any time soon. I don't want to see you for quite some time. Don't dare to come by without me asking for it." Jude said icily and with barely suppressed rage. Then she stormed out the flat, ran to her car and drove away. Trying to lose her anger on the highway.

When she was hours later at home again it was already getting dark. She threw her keys careless in the hallway, not even bothering to look where they landed. She took out her cell while she was walking to the living room. Ten missed calls. Most from Johnny, one from Megan and even one from Tommy. Like she'd ever call Megan or Tommy back. Megan was dead to her right now and how could she even talk to Tommy, when he thought that she had actually wrote this stuff about him. How should she explain everything and, most importantly, would he even believe her? Her whole life seemed to have turned into a bad soap-opera.

Jude contemplated for a few seconds to call Johnny, to pour out her heart, or to at least get her mind of the things for some more hours. But she knew she couldn't avoid the truth forever.

She dialed the now familiar number and was waiting for him to pick up, when her gaze fell on a white envelope on the living room table. She knew that she hadn't put it there. Jude aborted the call and went to the table, taking a closer look at the envelope. It had her name written on it in a familiar nice handwriting. Handwriting she'd recognize always and forever. Handwriting that was as familiar to her as her own.

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Wondering from whom the letter is? Or what it says? Review to find out!


	12. 12 I'm tired of the drama, all of it

Hey guys, here's the next update, I know it's kinda short, but at least there's some Jommy-ness. I promise the next update will be longer. I got a new idea a few days ago for another Instant Star ff and I'm going to put the first chapter, or the two first up right after this, I'd be happy if you'd check it out. It's going to be a Jommy and I already got about 5-6 chapters written out. And some more planned out.

However, read and review, as usual. I really love all your reviews. Oh, and thanks for all the reviews the last chapter got :)

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Mistaken 12

Jude grabbed the envelope and opened it carelessly. Whatever Jamie wrote for her, it wouldn't be half as bad as what had already happened this day. She hadn't spoken much to Jamie lately, although she had intended to do so. But Jamie had always been busy with work and she was the last person who would ask him to stop with the job he obviously loved.

**Dear Jude,**

**I was coming by this morning but you weren't there, so I wrote this letter. I know, it's a coward-thing to do, but I can't help it. I'm actually relieved you're not here. You'll probably hate me by the end of this letter, so I'll say it before you burn it: I'm sorry. I'm leaving. Today, maybe right now. **

**I know I should have told you, but we were just getting along again and it meant so much to me. You said a few nights ago that you needed me, but the truth is, it has never been that way. It was the other way around, I needed you. That's why I wasn't mad at you for very long after you chose Tommy. We're different people and we'd have never fit. **

**I'm truly sorry I didn't tell you, but if I did you probably would have kept me back somehow and I can't let this happen. I got an offer for a manager job from a company in Washington. Yes, the city with the white house. I'm leaving today and Zepplin will ****probably follow in one or two days, as soon as everything's done with NBR.**

**Whatever you might think of me now, our friendship was always very important to me and it wasn't an easy decision to make. But in the end I chose to leave Toronto, because I need a fresh start.**

**However, I wish you only the best and I know you'll make your way without my help just fine.**

**Love and I'll miss you**

**Jamie**

"No, no, no!" Jude whispered after she had finished reading through two times. She couldn't believe it. Her life was falling apart and Jamie was leaving? Just when they had finally began to get close again?

_Is this some sick kind of revenge or what? He knew he'd leave all along, but he didn't just not tell me, no, he even became my friend again, just to leave me. What's wrong with me, that everybody has to leave? Everyone I ever loved left me in the end: Dad, Sadie, Mom, Tommy, Kat, Georgia even G-Major abandoned me! And now Jamie too. Why me? Why is it always me?_

Jude collapsed on the couch, still not really getting the fact that Jamie was actually leaving for good. That he'd really leave her alone without even saying good-bye. And she would just let it happen?

Of course not. At least it was easier to try to take care of this problem than thinking about Tommy and what Megan had written. Jude stood up and walked straight out of the house, leaving the envelope behind.

15 minutes later Jude was storming down the stairs to the officially studio of NBR. She had needed that long because she had to find something properly to wear first. She was seeing Zepplin and Spied, sitting in front of the soundboard, but she couldn't find Jamie.

"Where is he?" She asked flat out, not bothering to say hello or something. She was pissed and definitely not in the mood to talk to Zepplin or Spied. Especially Spied since they hadn't talked since she had left G-Major and hadn't REALLY talked since his marriage with Karma.

"He's not here. I guess his flight's just about to start or he's already up in the air." Spied answered the question without hesitating, knowing quite well who Jude was talking about.

"Damn it, this stupid coward!" Jude cursed angry.

"Hello to you too. Long time no see. What's going on in your life stranger?" Spied asked with his typical cute smile.

"Sorry. I just can't believe he just left without saying anything. I'm fine, really. How are you and Karma?"Jude asked, not paying 100 % attention since she was still thinking about Jamie.

"Fine, everything's great." Spied said with a forced smile. Jude was about to ask what was wrong, but Spied cut her off. "So, you're not at G-Major anymore either, what are you doing these days? Haven't heard from you for quite some time now."

Jude looked at him pleading, she knew it had been stupid and idiotic from her to not call him, but she had had other things to worry about.

"Look, I know it wasn't right to not call you or anything, but since your marriage with Karma I haven't talked, like really talked to you once. I'm not blaming you for it or anything, it's just that that's the way things went and we didn't do anything about it. I kind of thought that maybe, you didn't need me as your friend anymore so I kind of didn't call. And you didn't too, so…" Jude stopped, running out of things to say. She had never intended on telling Spied all this, but now that he was right in front of her, looking like no time had passed at all, she couldn't help herself but be open.

"Jude, you're like my best friend. You're my best man dude! I'll never have enough of you ever. We even did a tour together, remember? You should know by now that you can't get rid of me that easily!" Spied answered joking around like always. Jude starred at him for a few moments like in awe. It felt just like it always used to. For Jude everything has changed in her life, but Spied had stayed the same and that was something she had really missed. She walked over to him and embraced him in a tight hug.

Spied hugged her back and winked over her shoulder at Zepplin and commented grinning.

"You see, all the girls worship me. You should really give me a raise!"

Jude pulled away and smacked him playfully.

"You're such a cocky idiot sometimes."

"And you can be a pretty bitchy diva sometimes."

"What? You did so not just say that!" Jude cried out, acting upset. She pulled away completely and tried to take a step back, but Spied just laughed and pulled her right back to him.

"You know you love me, just admit it already!"

"Yeah, I do. I'm so head over heels in love with you!" Jude joked and was laughing now too. She had missed fooling around with Spied soo much.

"I missed you." She admitted quietly.

"I missed you too, dude."

"Don't call me dude! I hate that!" Jude protested weakly, knowing well that he wouldn't stop anyway.

"Don't I know it." Spied retorted and finally released Jude out of his embrace.

"You won't ever change, will you?" Jude asked shaking her head at his childish grin.

"Not for anyone but you, you know?" He chuckled. Jude began laughing just moments before he couldn't keep himself from laughing as well.

"Guys, hate to interrupt, but I got Jamie on the phone right here and I somehow think you want to talk to him." Zepplin said and addressed Jude with a wink. Jude and Spied starred stupidly at Zepplin. They hadn't even noticed she had been talking into her cell all the time, they had temporarily even forgotten she was there with them.

Jude nodded and took the offered cell tentatively out of Zepplin hands, she suddenly wasn't that sure if she really wanted to talk to Jamie.

"Jamie?" She asked and hated how unsure her voice sounded.

"Hey." Jamie said, not sounding very happy either. "So you read my letter I guess."

"Yeah, I did." Jude said and sighed. "Why, Jamie? Why?"

"Jude, I'm really sorry, it's just… every time I was trying to tell you something got in the way or the situation just didn't seem right to me. I didn't want to mess up again and… I'm sorry." Jamie babbled in his typical kinda cute manner, like always when he was nervous. Jude used to love that. Just not now.

"So you're sorry for lying to me the entire time? Jamie, I fucking came crawling back to you, I apologized for everything and I truly believed we were back to where we were once, and then you just leave without even saying good-bye??"

"Jude, it's complicated, I-"

"No, I don't even wanna hear it. I really thought I could trust you again, but it seems like I misjudged once again. This time I don't wanna hear you're sorry anymore. I read your damn letter and then I immediately drove straight here and tried to catch you, but you know what? I don't care. Leave the town, leave the country for all I care, just stay away from me, alright? If Tommy taught me one thing, then that I'm way too forgiving. We're done, Jamie Andrews. We've been friends for the longest time." Jude ended somewhat sadly. At first she had been calm, then she had nearly been shouting since all her anger had been taking over and now, now she was calm again.

"But Jude, please, hear me out, it's not like you think-" But Jude didn't bother to listen any longer, she gave the cell back to Zepplin without another word.

"I gotta get going guys. Got something to take care off. Spied, give me a call, yeah?" Jude asked while she was already walking to the stairs.

"'Course dude. Won't let you get away again!" Spied shouted after her and with that she was gone.

Jude was standing in front of Tommy's apartment. She had come her straight from NBR and now she was contemplating if she should actually ring or not. She was nervous like hell, but she was also determined to go through with this thing.

Suddenly the door opened and a half grinning Tommy was standing there, looking at her amused.

"How long to you need to actually ring?" He asked teasing.

"Funny, Quincy." Jude said shortly. "Can I come inside?"

"That depends on what you're planning to do. Searching for new stuff to write about in your blog?" Tommy continued, still grinning.

"Of course, didn't you know I'm all about gossip these days, Little Tommy Q?" Jude retorted sarcastically and walked into the apartment without waiting for him to ask her in. She wasn't planning on staying very long anyways.

"Go ahead, invite yourself in." Tommy commented still amused about something Jude didn't get.

"Listen, I don't know why you're grinning like a fool, but I don't really care either. So let's just get this over with, ok? Don't interrupt me, cause I'm only saying this once." Jude began, breathed in deeply and continued. "I'm sorry about what's standing on my blog. I didn't write it, I swear. I wouldn't ever write something like this in the internet and I think you know that. I did, however, say it and that's why someone I thought was a friend wrote it "for me". But I don't really think you're a fraud or a coward or something, I was just kind of angry. You've always been a great producer and friend to me and I have nothing but respect for you." Jude assured him and herself, making clear that she wasn't in his apartment to start something with him. "So, that's it. I'm gonna leave now and let you get back to… whatever you were just doing." Jude mumbled and walked to the door again.

She was feeling nervous and stupid for coming in the first place. But at the same time she felt relieved that she had told Tommy, that she hadn't wrote all the mean stuff about him. On the other side it was incredibly dumb to come to HIS apartment.

Just like Jude had feared, Tommy didn't just let her walk out like nothing ever happened. A hand enclosed her left upper arm and she was hold back by his gentle but firm grip. She slowly turned around to face him, avoiding eye contact.

"What do you want?" She asked, sounding as vulnerable as she felt around him in that moment. She wasn't ok right now, because her old feelings for Tommy were resurfacing, just like they always did when he was around and on top of that she was still hurt because Jamie had just bailed on her.

"You." Tommy answered quietly but honest, obviously trying to convince Jude that he really meant it.

"Tommy. Please." Jude begged, she begged him to stop, to let her go for good. She needed closure, and she needed to move on.

"I can't Jude." Tommy said calmly. He knew what she was asking, but he'd rather die than give up on her. Especially since he knew to whom she'd go back then, to this alcoholic named Johnny.

"I can't let you go, because I love you. And I won't let you go because I care about you. You're way too good to be with this stupid guy Johnny. He doesn't treat you right, I know that and you know it too! He can't love you if he hits you, drunken or not."

"Don't Tommy, please… you don't know him the way I do. Just let it go, alright?" Jude asked desperately, she felt her resolves weakening with every second. Maybe it had just been too much for her lately, or maybe she was just tired of being strong, but if Tommy wasn't letting her go right now, she didn't know what would happen. "Just let me go, Tommy. There's nothing left to fight about. I told you I don't wanna fight. All I want is to move on. I can't do this anymore, I'm so tired of everything, of the drama, of the heartbreak. I just got enough." Jude pleaded weakly, trying to explain how she felt, how tired she was of everything. She had had enough drama for the rest of her life and she didn't want to make anything anymore complicated. And that meant she needed to get over Tommy.

"Jude, your life's always been full of drama and it always will! You're a rockstar, you don't get to live a normal quiet life because you're not normal." Tommy said, talking to her like to a little child, he felt sorry for her since he could sense that she really was at a breaking point, but he couldn't just let her go for good. He loved her too much.

"Well then maybe I don't wanna be a rock star anymore." Jude murmured quietly, more to herself than to Tommy. But when she felt Tommy stir she knew he had heard her. She wasn't surprised that he was shocked, she was the last person to ever say she didn't want to be a rock star, it has always been her dream, her highest priority. She finally looked up into Tommy's blue and now worried eyes, but she regretted it immediately. He obviously wasn't going to make it any easier for her. She quickly continued. "Look, what I need right now is for you to let go of me. You and I, we had our chance. Hell, we had a million chances. But maybe we're just not meant to be; maybe it was just bad luck every single time. But whatever it was, it'll never change and I'm tired of getting my hopes up high again just to crash down even harder. I'm ready to let go, but I can't if you don't let go of me. So please, don't make me go through the same stuff all over again, I can't take it anymore."

Tommy looked at her and it broke Jude's heart to see the hurt in his eyes. She knew he was sorry for everything he had done, if she hadn't believed him before, she did at that moment. Jude didn't want Tommy to be miserable or to blame himself for whatever went wrong, but she couldn't give them another chance, not when she some pieces of her heart were still missing.

"Tommy, I don't want you to blame yourself or something. It's not your fault everything went wrong. I'm sorry for messing around with your personal business back there at New Brunswick. I should have let you go on your own. And I'm sorry for ruining our friendship, because before the whole mess started, and even all the way through, you've been my best friend and the person I trusted the most. You told me often enough that a relationship was the surest way to mess everything up, but I didn't want to listen. But whatever, that's over now. No ones to blame. Neither you nor me."

Jude felt how Tommy's grip loosened and she knew she had won. But it wasn't a feeling of victory that was filling her now, it was sadness and regret. What a poor victory, convincing the man she had once called the love of her life, that "they" wasn't worth fighting for anymore. She believed what she had said, but she still wished things were different. She turned her back on Tommy and walked to the door.

"Jude." Tommy called suddenly.

"What else Tommy?" Jude asked somewhat impatiently. It wasn't easy on her either.

"I won't give up. You're right, we messed it up in the past, mostly I did, but it's different now. I love you, Jude. I know that and I know that I always will, come what may."

"Then" Jude said quietly. "Then that's too bad I guess." She walked out the door, physically hurting herself with every step, but if she'd go back, she was sure about that, she'd only have to face more pain later.

Jude pressed the button for the elevator, leaning at the wall next to her for support. She was positively devastated, emotionally totally dried out. First Megan, then Jamie and now Tommy. And from what Tommy had said last, the thing with Tommy wasn't over yet.

The elevator doors were opening and an old married couple was already in there. Jude sighed and was about to enter the cabin when she was suddenly grabbed from behind and spun around. Before she could react or just form a thought, two lips crashed on hers. Jude instinctively responded to the passionate kiss with matching passion without even hesitating.

She barely heard the elevator doors close behind her with a "pling" while she was laying her arms around Tommy's neck, trying to pull him closer. His arms had found their way around Jude's waist and they were as close as humanly possible, still intertwined in their kiss.

They finally broke apart because the need for air was getting to strong. Jude lost herself in Tommy's blue eyes and she whispered quietly, with no force behind it.

"We shouldn't be doing this."

"Should I stop?" Tommy asked innocently while his hands were roaming over Jude's body and his lips nearly touching hers.

"No, please don't." Jude pleaded, not able to resist his touch and feeling like she would die without his kisses. He smiled at her and kissed her again, this time he was walking backwards back into his apartment, pulling her with him.

For one second Jude thought that she should better not do this, that she should stop while she could, but truth was, she couldn't.

Suddenly Tommy's cell ringed. 90 % of Jude wanted to cry out loud at the interruption, but 10 % were telling her that she'd better take this chance and get as far away as somehow possible.

"I gotta get this. Just one second." Tommy excused himself and answered the cell, while walking a few steps away and turning the back on Jude. Finally she was able to think resonable again, without his blue eyes distracting her.

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What is Jude going to do? Review to find out! ;)


	13. 13 I know what I'm in and I like it

Hey guys, I know I haven't update for quite some time now and everything just kind of sucked, but here I am again with another chapter, yay. I just hope you like it and I can promise you the next chapter's going to be amazing, at least when it goes as I planned it. I really like to write this story, although right now I can't really stop writing for this other IS fic, **Stolen Glances**, since I got so many ideas for it and i got it already planned out up to chap 16 or so... If you want to check it out ;) But that however doesn't mean I don't like writing on this story, it's just that I got so much work to do and I don't really have much time for writing. So here it goes...

Enjoy reading and please **review** ;)

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Mistaken Chapter 13

Tommy threw Jude an apologizing look, completely oblivious to her inner fight. He murmured an excuse, got his cell and walked out the hall way over in the living room. Jude could still hear his voice, but she couldn't understand the words. She didn't need to.

All Jude needed to know was that Tommy was busy, that he wouldn't pay attention to her for a few minutes since he was occupied. If she left now he wouldn't stop her, would try to hold her back. She would make it out of here, able to avoid Tommy for the rest of her life. She would feel guilty about what had happened, but it wouldn't be that bad, it had only been a kiss and a little make-out session. Old feelings resurfacing, there was nothing more to it. He had kissed her and she had felt like the last months had never happened.

But it had happened; he had broken up with her and told her she was poison, told her to stay away. She had moved on and was with Johnny now, who was the perfect boyfriend. She would feel guilty because of Johnny, but if she walked away now everything would be forgotten and forgiven soon enough.

But if she just left now, she'd be no better than Tommy. If he really felt like he claimed he did, then he would feel like she had when he made her promised that kiss on her 16th birthday had never happened or like when he had walked out on her on their first date. Jude didn't want to be that kind of a person, she wasn't sure if she could be that kind of a person.

However, she couldn't risk him coming back either. He'd make her lose her mind all over again if he so much as touched her, talked to her, or even looked at her. She'd forget everything again and she'd really have a problem in the morning.

Jude reached for a bottle of water next to the bed on a little nightstand, carelessly as she was a book that laid right next to the bottle fell of the nightstand and landed on the floor. Because of the carpet it didn't make a sound through. Jude grabbed it, curious what Tommy was reading. She was surprised when it had no title written on it.

Jude opened the book and flipped through the pages. It was a journal, full with songs. On the first side was stanging: "For Jude" and afterwards there were following many songs, all with a date. The first one was dated for a few weeks after they had first met and the last one was dated only a day ago. Jude was stunned.

She had always suspected that Tommy was still writing songs, but he had always denied it and after he had gotten all upset about her messing around with "Frozen" she had forgotten more or less about that topic. Tommy had always just been the producer to her and she had forced the thoughts about a solo career of him out of her mind, especially since she had secretly feared he wouldn't be her producer then any longer.

Most of the songs were about strong feelings for a girl, which had to be Jude of course, and some were about love and stuff. Especially the last songs were about being sorry through, about regret and remorse.

From what was standing in this journal Tommy had loved her all the time, but why had he done the things he did when he loved her? Why had he called her poison?

Jude got overwhelmed by all the feelings and thoughts that stormed in on her. It was too much, too much she had to deal with and to work out. She stood up quickly and strode over to the door, determined to leave and to not come back that quickly.

Jude unlocked the door and was about to sneak out when she glanced back one last time. She stopped breathing for a moment when she saw Tommy appear in the door frame of the living room. He looked at her and their eyes met. He had this betrayed look on his face. That one which told Jude that he had actually believed things had or would change that she would stay with him and give him a second chance. His eyes quickly showed the hurt and the heartbreak when he realized she was about to leave, about to just sneak out without even saying good-bye.

A pang of hurt shot through Jude's heart when she saw him like that, she knew that look just too well and she was pretty sure she had worn it when Tommy had pulled stuff like that on her in what seemed like ages ago. She felt bad for her weak attempt to sneak out and her plan to act like it never happened.

Suddenly Jude felt stupid, there she was, standing in the door, already half way through it. She opened her mouth to say something, but no sound was coming out. She finally tore her eyes away from Tommy's and looked everywhere but not at him.

"I… I got an interview tomorrow. I gotta go and get some sleep. I guess." Jude made a weak attempt to not let this whole thing look like what it was, her trying to sneak out without having to face what had happened.

Tommy wasn't saying a thing and Jude knew without looking that he was just staring at her with his piercing blue eyes. The silence was getting more to Jude than anything he could have said.  
"Or today." Jude added randomly when she glanced at a clock that was positioned above the living room door and saw that it was already after midnight. "See you around." With that Jude fled out the door and rushed to the elevator, praying that Tommy wouldn't follow her.

Jude was sitting in the stylist's room waiting for Miranda to perfect her make-up. She wasn't envying the woman at all who was trying to make the dark cycles under Jude's eyes invisible. Jude had barely slept at all the whole night. She had been lying awake instead and had thought about the songs that Tommy had written about her and their non-existent relationship and about her very existent relationship with Johnny.

With Johnny there were sparks and everything and he made her laugh. She really felt comfortable around him and she had thought long enough that she was in love with him. The only problem in what sounded so perfect was that these feelings were nothing compared to what she felt when she was with Tommy. Plus there always was this little quiet voice in her head, telling her that Tommy would have never hurt Jude even when he was drunk.

But Tommy had had hurt Jude. Not physically, but emotionally, and these wounds hadn't even healed yet. Johnny was loving all the time and he told her that he love her and he said out loud all the things that Tommy had never been able to say. The things that Jude had been missing all these years, ever since she knew Tommy.

And –most importantly- he was her BOYFRIEND. Johnny, not Tommy. Yet she had been kissing and making out with the latter.

"Hey Shorty, how ya doing?" Shay asked when he entered the room with his usual big grin on his face. Jude smiled weakly at his always good mood.

"Fine, everything's peachy."

"Except for your sleeping sweetheart, you don't get these cycles under your eyes from nothing." Miranda commented obviously not happy at all with what she had to work with.

"Sorry Miranda." Jude said sarcastically, but Miranda just ignored her.

"So you haven't been sleeping that much lately?" Shay asked amused at Jude's attempts to hide something from him.

"If you say so." Jude replied annoyed.

Suddenly a thought crossed Shay's mind and immediately his face grew serious and worried. "Jude, did he…?" Shay asked tentatively.

"NO!" Jude nearly yelled. Miranda flinched and nearly dropped the cream dose in her hand, she shot Jude a glare, telling her to not ever do that again then she continued with her work. Jude blushed slightly and continued then in a more quiet tone.

"God, no, Shay. He didn't, of course he didn't! It happened twice, for god's sake, it won't happen again. He loves me. It was a mistake and he's sorry. In fact, since you're obviously oh-so interested, he took me out on a date yesterday and it was amazing! I told him some time ago that I always wanted to go to the jungle, but that I'd probably miss the city. Know what he did? He rented a roof of a skyscraper and made a jungle out of it, just for me! My personal jungle in the city. No one ever did something that sweet for me!"

"Ouch, that hurt!" Shay feigned hurt and acted like he was shot right at the heart. "Look, I know I haven't been exactly a perfect boyfriend back then, but from what I heard your boyfriends weren't all that bad."

"Oh, yeah, right. Jamie and Spied don't really count since all the time I've been in love with Tommy, so it wasn't their fault it ended badly. But Tommy? Seriously, he walked out of me on our first date. He denied feeling anything for me, he made me promise our first kiss never happened and he even dated my sister for god's sake. On top of it all he broke up with me and called me poison. Yeah, you're right, I can't complain."

"So yours and Tommy's relationship wasn't easy. True love never is. You can't tell me that you truly believe that he doesn't love you! And besides, Johnny might have made an effort and it might be the most expensive thing a guy has ever pulled off for you, but the sweetest? From what I heard Tommy wrote a song for you, didn't he? And he stuck around all those years, sold his soul to Darius to stay with you. He even bought the rights for all of your songs for you after Darius messed up." Shay defended Tommy, using everything that he had heard about Jude and Tommy since he was back in Toronto.

Jude rolled her eyes at Shay's words, they were true, but Tommy had done enough things that had broken her heart in a million pieces, the things Shay told her now had been sweet and everything, but did they really made up for everything?

"You're right, he did all those things, but at least Johnny didn't break my heart once. Ok, he doesn't know me all that long, but I feel safe with him, I know what I'm in and I like it. There are no surprises or heartbreaks. With Tommy it was always a risk and I never knew if he would still be around the next day. I used to think that true love could overcome it all, just like you said, but nowadays I'm wondering if there aren't things that can't be forgiven." Jude whispered, still loud enough for Shay to hear, but it although showed that Jude was really emotionally exhausted. "I know it sounds hard to say this, but I'm tired of the drama. I've done it all, I've been shot down and yet I always got back up again, waiting for the next bullet and I took it without hesitating. But I'm done with this and I don't know if I could do it all over again. Besides, Johnny's great and he makes me laugh and I'm happy with him. I'm with Johnny now, Tommy had his chance. Since when are you a fan of Tommy's anyways? Didn't you two always fight? What was your name for him again? Right, Saint Tommy."

"I'm not a fan of Tommy's, but I know that he loves you. He might be messed up, but you two belong, everybody can see that when you're together. It's like a cliché love story. Johnny's not right for you and somewhere deep inside you know that. Besides, he can't be that perfect. Think of what he has done to you! Tommy would have never ever done that, because he loves you."

"Whatever." Jude murmured, not wanting to continue this conversation. Shay's words only repeated what she had been secretly thinking all along, but she couldn't really believe that Johnny was a bad guy. He had told her he loved her and she believed him.

Before Shay could pursue that matter further Johnny entered the room, having a couple of roses and other flowers in his hands.

"Hey baby." He said smiling and kissed Jude on the lips.

"Hey." Jude said softly before she was forced back into her chair by Miranda who was clearly not amused. "Sorry." Jude said once again sheepishly, but she grinned at Johnny as soon as Miranda wasn't paying attention for a moment.

"Yesterday was amazing Johnny, thanks once again." Jude said smiling adoringly at her boyfriend.

"Anything for my baby!" Johnny grinned and smiled at Shay who was glaring at him. "What's up with you Shay?"

"Nothing. I'm fine, everything's peachy." Shay mimicked Jude's earlier words and Jude glared at him while Johnny didn't know what was going on.

"These are for you Jude." Johnny said and gave the flowers to Jude.

"Thanks, but that really wasn't necessary, I'm only getting interviewed and you gave me enough yesterday." Jude smiled at him.

"I know, I'm not giving them to you because you're getting interviewed." Johnny said mysteriously. "Miranda, would you mind giving us a minute of privacy?" Johnny asked politely. Johnny waited until Miranda had left the room then he turned back at Jude who was looking at him curiously.

"I got a message from my agent and I'll be doing a new Hollywood movie in a few weeks. I already talked to Darius and he's ok with me recording my songs in the studio in L.A." Johnny paused.

"That's amazing, Johnny." Jude said immediately, knowing he had really hoped for this role.

"Yeah, I know. But I've been thinking. I really like you, but I know from experience that these long distance relationships hardly work out. And I found that I love you way too much to risk losing you. So I had another idea. I know it's on short notice and we don't even know each other that long, but I think it's the best way for both of us. Because I love you and you love me." Johnny suddenly knelt down. "Jude, would you marry me?"

Silence was his only answer. Shay was just staring at the two and Jude was completely shocked. She would have never ever expected something like this. So much to no surprises with Johnny.

"Look, I know it's surprising, but I really love you and I think you're perfect for me. You're the one for me and I hope I'm that for you too. I haven't planned everything out yet, but I already talked to your boss at Diamond Records and he's ok with you recording in L.A. too. I already got us an apartment and I got you a ring too." Johnny said quickly and pulled out a little black box, opened it and showed Jude a beautiful diamond ring that was sure as hell more expensive than anything Jude had worn before. Maybe as expensive as these earrings Portia had lent her at this award show she had been with together with Mason.

"Johnny… this is… wow." Jude stuttered, knowing he was expecting her to say something, but she didn't know what to say. She loved Johnny, she really did, but she still had this undefined feelings for Tommy and she had just made out with Tommy less than 24 hours ago, she couldn't just marry Johnny now, could she? But if she said no, she'd ruin everything and hurt Johnny. She didn't want that. After all she wasn't in love with Tommy or something.

Johnny realized that Jude didn't know what to say and he was suddenly way less excited than before. He stood up quietly and put the box with the expensive ring on the table. "You don't have to answer me right away of course." Johnny assured her, but his eyes told a whole other story. He had expected her to answer right away and now he was hurt. She could see that.

"I'll go outside and watch your interview from the first row. We'll talk about everything later. Think about it, I know it's pretty much." With that Johnny turned and left the room.

Jude was putting her head in her hands and tried to fight back the tears. She had to be out there in front of the camera in three minutes, she couldn't start crying now. Right, she had so totally not known what she had been into, because if she did she would have seen this coming, wouldn't she?

"Jude…" Shay said and walked over to her, rubbed over her back soothingly. He didn't even know what to say. Johnny had just proposed to Jude, no one had seen that coming. And even Shay couldn't find something about the way he had taken Jude's confusion. In fact he had acted very understanding and he had even tried to hide his hurt and had told Jude that she could take her time. Shay had honestly expected Johnny to freak out in a situation like this.

"God, why is everything so messed up?" Jude sobbed. "Why can't my life be easy for once? Here I am, I have a great boyfriend and he just proposed to me and told me he loved me and that I'm the one for him. And what do I do? I stutter and don't even know how to answer. I kissed Tommy last night while he was probably thinking about how he'd propose to me. I cheated on him and he asks me to marry him. What a pathetic girlfriend am I?"

"Woah, you KISSED Tommy?" Shay asked stunned.

"Yeah I did. I'm a terrible person."

"No, you're not. You're just in love and you're denying it." Shay said quietly while his mind was working on high speed.

"Jude? You're on in a minute!" An intern called through the door. Jude cringed. Then she quickly stood up and looked herself over in the mirror. She had to put new mascara on and some more powder, but the damage wasn't that bad yet. She dried her tears quickly and perfected her make up again. Then she turned to Shay and smiled shakly.

"How do I look?" She asked.

"Amazing, but Jude, you can't just go out there. You're not ready to do this now. You've just been a crying mess minutes ago."

"I know, but I need to do this. I can't think about Johnny or Tommy right now, I need to get my ass out there and do the interview. I'm a star and I'm the queen of denying by now." With that Jude walked out the room.

Somewhere in the same building at the same time:

"I gotta go out there now and interview Jude. But I'll do what you want me to, you'll get your chance to tell her how you feel. I'm sure you'll get her."

"Thanks, Harry, I really owe you big time for this."

"No problem, it's my show after all. Besides, you deserve to be happy."

"Yeah, I am happy when I'm with her. I love her. And I think she loves me too. I'm sure she'll say "yes". At least I'll take my chances and ask her. She's gotta answer this time, she's live on TV after all. Worst case scenario is she says "no", but at least I know where I'm heading then."

"Don't fool yourself boy, if she says "no" you'll be crushed, no matter how famous you are. You might not want to admit it, but you love this girl." The moderator smiled one last time knowingly then he went away to interview Jude. The guy watched him walking away. It was true. Jude Harrison was his life and if she didn't want him when he told her he loved her on TV he didn't know what else to do.

* * *

Ok, I guess you're all wondering what will happen next. Well at least you should be if I'm not a very bad writer and you're IS fans. You know I got tons of work to do this month. But I tell you what: if you give me five reviews for this chapter I'll update within the month, no matter how much of work I still got to do, if you give me 10 reviews (!) then I'll review within the next 2(!) weeks. So, it's up to you ;) I know I'm a evil person... But hey, life's not fair and school sucks, yet I have to live and I have to go to school... :D Oh and btw, the next chapter's going to be longer than this one... I think... ;)

Maybe I'll post some teasers for the next chapter too soon, that is if you want some...

xoxo Kathy


	14. 14 If I were you I'd be worried

Chapter 14

Jude was sitting on a couch opposite to the one the interviewer was sitting on. With every minute going by she was feeling more collected, calmer than before. The questions weren't difficult to answer and there weren't any mean questions or stuff. All in all, this Harry Winston guy was a very nice person. What did surprise Jude through was that he hadn't once asked about her and Johnny's relationship. Since they had gone public the press and everything was all over them like all the time.

Jude was really losing her last nerve about the paparazzi and the rumors and lies in the tabloids, but Johnny somehow had always managed to stay cool and make fun of the reporter so that Jude wasn't too angry or something. He was used to the attention since he was a famous movie star, there had been rumors about Jude and Tommy too when they had been dating, but nothing compared to now. And now where she was confused anyways she was really glad there weren't any questions.

Still, it was kind of strange that she wasn't asked a single question about Johnny. However Jude was pretty glad about that, since after that unexpected proposal she was confused about everything related to Johnny. She had been confused before because of the whole Tommy thing, but she had been sure about what she and Johnny had had in her opinion: a relationship that wasn't too serious but could become serious with the time. She had been thinking they were taking things slow and just enjoying their lives. Obviously Johnny had made other plans though.

"So Jude, what do you have to say about your latest single, that was released officially this morning?" Harry asked smiling.

"The song's called "Running With The Devil" and it's the last single released before the album. It's kind of a complicated song and for most it won't make much sense when they first hear the lyrics. I don't really wanna explain them, because I want my fans to interpret them for their selves. That's why I and my label's planning on doing a contest." Jude announced, sounding excited and smiled, just like she had been told to do. Then she turned to looks straight into the camera and continued: "I want all of your ideas, best would be in form of videos or pictures or stuff like that. I want you to interpret one of my songs, everything will be made officially when my album's released, but maybe you can start to think of something already!"

"That sounds pretty good to me Jude, I'm sure you'll have quite some work to do to look through everything that will be sent. But let's come back to the interview, I got a kind of personal question for you, well rather two. Ready?"

Jude forced a smile, she had been waiting for this, now he would ask her about Johnny and stuff. Great. Just great.

"Of course Harry, can't wait to hear them."

"Well then first up, do you like surprises?"

"Surprises?" Jude asked confused. What kind of a question was that? Jude's mind was working with high-speed while everybody was waiting for her answer.

_What the hell is this supposed to be? Of course I like surprises. Well kind of. Surprising proposals aren't exactly on my top ten list, or my top 100 for that matter, but surprises in general? Wait, what if this is some kind of plan of Johnny's? What if he jumps out here every second and asks me to marry him in front of millions of watcher. No, he wouldn't do that, now would he? That would be totally unromantic. But I never thought he'd freaking propose to me either…_

"It always depends on what the surprise is of course, but in generally I'd say yes. I guess." Jude answered somewhat hesitantly.

"Good answer, if I may say that. So here goes the next. Do you believe in true love?"

Jude's mouth nearly fell agape. If it was possible this question was even weirder than the first one.

_What the fuck is going on here? This just doesn't make sense. True love. What is true love? I thought me and Tommy, we were true love, but we're over now, so it couldn't be true love, could it? Johnny and me? Well, I like him and care about him, I might even love him, although right now I'm not sure of anything, but true love? _

"To be true, Harry, I'm not sure. I do believe that there is true love, but I've been there and done that and now I'm not that sure anymore. So the short answer: I used to."

"Not the answer I was hoping for, but I think we can go with that." Harry said with a knowing smile and Jude felt even more uncomfortable, knowing something was up. "You'll probably wonder about the seemingly strange questions I asked. Well here comes the missing link. I got a friend of mine who asked me to come here to this show when he heard you'd be my guest today. This guy really loves you and so I thought, I'd give him, and you, a chance. So please just listen to him, alright?"

Jude stared at Harry dumbfounded while the lights were suddenly dimmed. Jude was feeling like she had woken up in the wrong movie, this wasn't funny at all. She didn't want to have to answer Johnny on national TV, and that had to be what was coming, because who else would do something like that?

_I can't believe it. This isn't how it's supposed to be, I told him I needed time, what's so hard to understand about it? This guy's really full of himself when he thinks he can trick me into agreeing. Wait. Trick me into agreeing? That would mean that I didn't want to marry him. But if I love him, what's so wrong with taking the next step? Ok, it's soon and fast and everything, but who cares? _

Jude closed her eyes for a moment when a realization occurred to her that shocked her. She didn't want to marry Johnny and it wasn't just for the unexpected proposal. She didn't love him.

_Great, now the only thing left to do is telling him that. _

Suddenly Jude heard music fill the studio. She wondered what it was going to be, if Johnny maybe would sing his new single, it would be great publicity and Darius would love it. For a moment a scary thought crossed Jude's mind; what if Darius had initiated the whole proposal thing?

But when a male familiar voice reached Jude's ears she opened her eyes wide, not believing in what she was hearing.

_**I know **__**I wasn't there  
when you needed me the most  
I know I didn't care  
and was afraid to get so close  
**_

It was Tommy's voice, and there he was standing, at the edge of the studio, slowly approaching, his eyes fixed on Jude. His voice was soft, the softness that a thousand of females had fallen in love with. Jude could tell from his look and his tone that he was sincere and she couldn't help but stop thinking for the moment and just listen in awe to his song. It was a wonder to her that he was singing again, singing just for her. How often had she told him to start a solo career and how often had he told her he was done with singing? She did know now about the lyrics he had written to her, but to hear him pour out his feelings in a song and sing it directly to her, it was a completely different feeling.

_**T**__**onight it's getting hard to fall asleep  
Cause it becoming clear that I broke all into pieces  
And I can not reverse it  
So I've got one more thing so say **_

Jude's thoughts were slowly coming back and she was able to understand what he was really saying. She wondered what night he meant, did he mean every night, like she hadn't been able to sleep for so long after he had called her poison? Or the way she hadn't been able to calm down after she had told him good-bye when he had stopped by to warn her about Shay? Jude was curious what was coming next, because he was right, he couldn't take back what he said and if it hadn't before then everything had fallen into pieces for Jude after he had left after that kiss they had secretly shared at the G-Major party.

_**I**__**'m sorry for your pain  
I'm sorry for your tears  
**_

_He's sorry. Well, he certainly said that before. And I'm sorry too. I just don't know if that's enough anymore. What happened happened and he really can't reverse it or take it back.  
_

_**For all the little things I**__** didn't know  
I'm sorry for the words I didn't say  
**_

_Funny, when I think back what hurts the most weren't the things he didn't say, but the things he did. Like making me promise that "it never happened", or that he had to leave and wouldn't come back. All the times he told me he wasn't worth me, that he was breaking my heart because of me. And on top of all. He called me poison._

_**But what I**__** still do  
I'm still loving you... **_

How was Jude supposed to believe in that again? She had done it several times, even when he had denied it and yet, every time she had set her heart on the line she had gotten it handed back in pieces. The reason she had hooked up with Johnny and had broke everything off with Tommy was that she wasn't willing to take another shot anymore.

_**I know I let you wait  
A**__**nd been away for far too long**_

Now Tommy had nearly reached Jude and he hadn't broke eye contact once since she had opened her eyes and looked at him. Jude was feeling more nervous with every step he took towards her, but she couldn't tear her eyes from his either. She felt like she had all those years all over again.

_**But now I can relate  
To everything that I did wrong  
Stop breathing when I think I'm losing you  
**_

By now he had reached her, was standing right in front of her. Suddenly he went down on his knees and his head was now nearly on one level with Jude's who was still sitting on the couch and who was now looking slightly down on him.

_**A**__**nd there'll be no excuses so I'm on my knees  
So listen please  
Let me hold your hand once again **_

Tommy took her hand and sqeezed it reassuringly, smiling at her when she wasn't pulling away. As if she really had a choice. Jude's heart was taking control now and rational thoughts went out the window, just like they had the night before.

_**I'm sorry for your pain  
I'm sorry for your tears  
For all**__** the little things I didn't know  
I'm sorry for the words I didn't say  
I'm sorry for the lies  
I'm sorry for the fights  
For not showing my love a dozen times **_

_It had been way more than a dozen times. It was every damn day. Hell, why did I let him take my hand? He's way too close and this wasn't part of the plan. _

_**I'm sorry for the things that I**__** called mine  
But what I still do  
I'm still loving you **_

_Well, I'm afraid the plan went out the window with the first__ word he sang and the moment our eyes lock. This stupid amazing unique eyes of his…_

_**I'm sorry for your pain  
And I'm sorry for your te**__**ars  
For all the little things I didn't know  
I'm sorry for the words I didn't say  
Sorry for the lies  
And I'm sorry for the fights  
for not showing my love a dozen times  
I'm sorry for the things that i called mine  
But what I still do  
I'm still loving you **_

_**That's what I**__**'ll always do**_

Tommy's last vocals faded and the music ended soon enough after that. Tommy's still on his knees, the micro in his left hand while he was holding Jude's hand in his right. It was a cheesy scene, but the gathered audience of course loved it and applauded.

"I'm sorry Jude, for everything, but most of all for letting you go." Tommy said quietly and sincere.

Jude smiled stirred. He was so cute how he was kneeing there, begging for her forgiveness.

"Why do you guys always make it this hard to stay mad at you?" Jude asked rhetorical and grinned when his eyes lit up when he realized that Jude was actually forgiving him.

"Because we're always a little slow in realizing what's best for us and what we need to fight for, I guess." Tommy murmured so quietly that only Jude could hear it. Then he pulled Jude's head down to his and their lips met once again, this time in front of national TV. It took Jude a while to notice what they were doing and to remember Johnny. She quickly pulled away then.

"Tommy, we can't just-"

"I know. And maybe you're right and we shouldn't jump into anything, but girl, I love you. I don't want to waste any more time. I loved you from the moment I got to really know you and from your 16th birthday on I tried to fight it, I did so many mistakes that I stopped counting, but yet you were always there for me. I'm a mess, but you are what made me a better man. I'm done fighting and done with running. Jude, you're my love and my inspiration. Will you make me the happiest man alive and marry me?" Tommy asked, he was obviously nervous since he spoke the words passionately but pretty quick too.

Jude stared at Tommy dumbfounded. He had proposed to her. She had gotten a proposal that she hadn't expected at all. Again.

_What's wrong with me? Am I simply oblivious to everything or is this whole talk about knowing when it's right bullshit? Because I seem to never know when it's right. Besides, who is Tommy to do this to me? He knew I couldn't resist him when he sings this song and when he's so sincere about everything. If he really loves me, why didn't he let me go like he tried to do all those years? I'm on national TV for god's sake and I just kissed a guy who proposed to me afterwards__, who's not my boyfriend. Oh my god. Johnny. Shit._

That was the moment when Jude's mind screamed at her to get out of the damn studio and get as much distance between herself and every damn guy on this planet as possible. As usually now Jude's defensive mode kicked in, she wasn't going to talk or even think about Tommy or Johnny now. And whoever would try to mess with her right now would need all luck of this world to survive.

"What the hell is wrong with the guys nowadays? Do I have a sign on my forehead screaming: "Propose to me?" Twice is best, because one proposal's just not enough for me." Jude asked half shouting and with that she pulled her hand out of Tommy's and left him behind on his knees while she ran out of the studio.

When she left the building and headed for her she suddenly heard someone yelling her name and soon enough that certain someone had caught up with her.

"Tell me Jude, are you outta your freaking mind? What the hell is wrong with you? Because I think I've been a good boyfriend up to now and yet you go and kiss that guy after I proposed to you on national TV. How do you think I'm looking now? Tomorrow it'll be in every damn tabloid that you cheated on me. Thank god they don't know about proposal. Jude, how could you do this to me?" Johnny shouted at her upset, while he grabbed both her shoulders and shook her violently as if that would help in any way except it made Jude feel dizzy and it hurt her.

"Let go of me Johnny, you're hurting me!"

"Well, nothing you haven't done to me in there. Do you know how it feels when your girlfriend is cheating on you on TV?" Johnny asked but he let go of her.

"So I kissed him, sue me! No reason to grab me like that!" Jude yelled, not willing to take the blame once again. "Just to your info, yeah I do know how that feels, my first boyfriend, Shay, actually broke up with me live on TV on my 16th birthday. It was great. Don't give me that look, I didn't tell you that I liked Tommy more and had an affair with him because he makes me feel great as whom I am. Besides, you want to marry me, but there are tons of stuff you don't know about me. For example, did you know that I've been in love with Tommy since I was 15? The only thing that happened inside there were old feelings resurfacing. Not more, not less. If I were you and would really be in love with me, I think I'd be worried about who I'll chose instead of blaming and yelling at me for bad publicity." Jude added coldly and climbed into her car, speeding off without giving Johnny a chance to say something else.

* * *

Ok, that was it. Tell me what you think, I know it's not my best work, but I think it's not the worst either. When I had the idea about the two proposals I thought like, that's it. I mean, what's better than two proposals? However, I think the story's coming to an end soon.

Please, pretty pretty please review!


	15. 15 Dangerous Realizations

Hey guys, I'm back with a new chapter. And I'm truly sorry it took me so long to update this. I was actually planning to do an update on all of my stories at once, but it seems like that will take longer than I thought it would. So I'll give you this, I've finished it for weeks already.

A big thanks to all who reviewed so far and stuck with this story. The reason I quit waiting until I finished the updates for two other of my stories that I currently have a harder time writing, are your reviews since I just read them through...

Hope you like it and review please.

* * *

Mistaken – Chapter 15 – Dangerous Realizations

Jude noticed how the first sun-rays crept through the shutters. She sighed and turned around, away from the soft light that was only reminding her what an awful and sleepless night she had had. She hadn't slept at all, because her mind had simply refused to switch off, no, she just had had to think about her relationship with Johnny/Tommy and the two proposals nonstop. Plus she hadn't been able to get Tommy's song out of her damn head. No, it had always been there, taunting her in her head, the lyrics, and the seemingly so perfect melody.

Although she had now over thought everything for hours, Jude still didn't know what to do and who to chose. She still felt SOMETHING for Tommy (denying that to herself was totally in vain by now), but she didn't know if it was enough or if it was still love. Most of all, she was scared of Tommy, scared that if she'd let him in again, that he would change his mind someday. That he would run away when they had reached their first rough patch.

And then there was Johnny, of course. Jude was still intrigued by the young star, similar to the fascination she had always felt with Tommy. Both were guys that she knew, she'd most likely never figure out. That was something she wanted from her boyfriend –or husband, or fiancé, or whatever-, one of the reasons things with Jamie and Spied had never really worked out.

Johnny was sweet, kind, funny and yet he was demanding, determined, strong and full of surprises. He had his issues, just like Tommy did. Tommy was full with this self-hatred, though Jude had tried to make him realize how stupid that was. Johnny had obviously a drinking problem, something Jude had tried to fight too. But Johnny had told her many times that he loved her, and he had sounded sincere just about every time, Tommy had always struggled with the "I love you" part, something that had hurt Jude deeply, more than she had ever realized before she had started dating Johnny.

During the night, Jude had realized though that the two guys weren't all that different, which probably was why it was such a hard decision to make. She knew, that whoever she'd chose, she'd lose the other one completely. If she chose Tommy, Johnny would leave and never come back; if she chose Johnny, Tommy would vanish into thin air once again, this time for good. But Jude didn't want to lose either one, she had depended on Tommy for so long that he could hardly ever be replaced (and by god, she had really learned that the hard way, she had fought to forget him but she just couldn't stop to care), but Johnny had a place in her heart now too, because he had cheered her up and had made her feel good about herself again, after Tommy had left.

_**Wha- wha- what did she say  
Mmmm whatcha say,  
Mmm that you only meant well?  
Well of course you did  
Mmmm whatcha say,  
Mmmm that it's all for the best?  
Of course it is  
**_

Jude's cell went off. She groaned and put a pillow over her head, trying to ignore the noise. She really didn't want to leave the bed, especially not to talk with Shay. Last day's events were the last thing she wanted to talk or think about. Sadly she couldn't really help about the latter, but she could at least keep on trying.

_**I was so wrong for so long  
Only tryin' to please myself (myself)  
Girl, I was caught up in her lust  
When I don't really want no one else  
So, no I know I should of treated you better  
But me and you were meant to last forever**_

But Shay was obviously not giving up, so Jude gave in. She leaned over the edge of her bed, ending up with having her whole upper body in a dangerously shaky position over the ground, reaching with stretched arms for her cell, which she had placed on a little commode. Finally she was able to grab in and quickly crawled back into the bed and under her blanket.

"Yeah?" Jude answered the phone, intentionally sounding annoyed.

"Hey Shorty, good to know you're still alive." Shay answered, in a way too happy mood if you asked Jude. "Just wanted to know how you're holding up."

"I'm fine, why shouldn't I?" Jude rolled her eyes.

"Didn't have your coffee yet, did you? Or why are you so grumpy?" Shay asked and Jude could literally hear that he was grinning.

"Maybe I just don't like people waking me up from my beauty sleep." Jude stated. Ok, so maybe she hadn't slept at all, but Shay couldn't have known that, now could he?

"So you're actually trying to tell me that you slept even one minute?" Now he sounded even more amused. Damn it, why did he know her that well? It was really starting to freak Jude out...

"Get a life you freak, I can very well sleep without a bedtime story."

"Very funny Jude. Why don't we just talk about what really happened and then I'll maybe leave you to yourself and you can sulk a little bit longer?" He suggested in a "you-know-you-won't-get-rid-of-me-until-you-tell" tone.

"Duh. How much more hints do I have to throw into your face until you see that I DON'T WANNA TALK ABOUT IT!" Jude said annoyed, hoping that he'd just go with it and leave her alone. Too bad she knew Shay better than that.

"Well I don't care if you want to or not. You'll talk to me. It's not every day that someone I know gets two proposals at once. From the two dream guys of every woman on this damn planet, I might add."

_Argh, why does he always know everything? How in hell did he learn about Johnny's proposal as well??? But damn it, he's a fool for actually thinking I'd talk about something like this if I don't want to._

"Oh Shay-Shay, don't worry, your female fans still like you just as well!" Jude commented, grinning slightly, knowing that "the guys" always fought about having the most female fans. At least she had heard from Portia that there had been quite a contest between Shay and Tommy once, sometime after she and Shay had broken up, when she had been on tour with SME. Damn, how much she wished she could have been there when Darius had rebuked them like little school kids. Just the thought of it made Jude grin.

"Stop side-tracking, Jude. You should really know me better than to fall for this. Besides-"

"I'm so sorry Shay, but I'm just getting another call. I'll call you later. Maybe. See you around!" Jude cut him off and hung up. A broad grin on her face imagining how upset Shay now must look. Sadly she always seemed to miss out on the really priceless moments.

Unfortunately the smile didn't stay long on Jude's face, especially since it wasn't long until she remembered why she had hung up on Shay in the first place. The reason had surprisingly not been that it was simply loads of fun to piss him off.

When she heard the doorbell ring she was even kinda happy about the distraction. Though she knew she wouldn't be as soon as the visitor, whoever it was, would start questioning her about Tommy and Johnny and life-y in general. Great foresights.

When Jude did open the door, she found herself face-to-face with someone she certainly hadn't expected at all. Hell, she hadn't even thought of that person in days.

"Megan?" Jude asked surprised and incredulous. She had enough problems without her crazy ex-friend knocking on her door. And hadn't she told her to not come around again until she'd tell her that it was ok again? "What are you doing here?"

"Good to see you too, Jude. I'm just being the friend you need right now." Megan said cheerfully with a broad grin that made Jude somewhat uncomfortable.

"Ehm, didn't I tell you to leave me alone for some time? What makes you think that I want you to my friend after what you've done? You betrayed me, Megan. I trusted you and you totally blew it." Jude said, slowly getting angry. That girl really had some nerves, just showing up on her doorstep like that.

_She has posted a fucking lie on my blog, under MY name and has nearly messed up things between me and Tommy. And now she has the nerve to show up here again and acts like nothing ever happened? _

"Yeah well, I told you I was sorry. I don't see what the big deal is. I did what was best for you. That's why I'm here. I only want what's best for you, Jude!" Megan cried, sounding frustrated and impatient and slightly hysterical.

"You should better leave. Now." Jude stated coldly and closed the door in front of Megan. Or rather she tried to do so. But Megan calmly put her foot between the door and the frame and hindered Jude's this way.

"What the hell-" Jude started when Megan suddenly stepped closer. Jude took a few, slow steps backwards, but wasn't fast enough and the next moment she felt a slightly moist hankie pressed upon her mouth and nose. The last thing she remembered before everything went black around her was the crazy yet determined look on Megan's face and her broad grin.

* * *

"Hey it's Jude. Seems like you didn't reach me, or I didn't want you to. Whatever. You know the drill. –beep-" Tommy growled and nearly threw his cell down on the soundboard in front of him. "Damn it." He swore under his breath.

"Geez, man, you gotta be less aggressive towards things today. It's not their fault that Jude's not talking to you." Kwest said when he came in and saw and heard Tom nearly smashing down his cell. It would not have been the first thing to break today because of Tom Quincy.

"I know, I know. But this is just so… frustrating. I just want to talk to her. I want to explain. I NEED to talk to her, but she won't answer my calls. I even called Shay-Shay and all he told me was that he wouldn't tell me a thing. Cocky bastard." Tommy curses and looks around restlessly; searching for something he could throw against some wall.

He had been up all night, thinking about Jude and what had happened. He hadn't known that someone else (most likely Johnny) had proposed to Jude too. He had cursed himself million times, because his proposal had upset Jude so much.

Although he was secretly cheering the fact that Jude had obviously not said "yes" to the other guy's (Johnny's, he was sure of that) proposal. Sadly she hadn't said yes to him either. But she hadn't said no. And she had kissed him in front of cameras. So she had regretted it afterwards, but he just knew that she had liked and enjoyed it.

_Damn it, I need to see her. I need to talk to her. If I don't she'll talk herself out of feeling anything for me. She'll deny everything and she might even say yes to that idiot just to prove some stupid point. And I'd deserve it. I really, really messed up big time. __But I need her to give me another chance._

"No, don't you dare even looking at my coffee cup this way, it's a present from Sadie!" Kwest cried out loud and quickly grabbed his cup when he followed Tommy's eyes and saw them fixated on his precious cup.

"I need to see her. Right now." Tommy got up, grabbed his jacket and walked towards the door.

"I'm not sure if that's a good idea. She might not want to-" Tommy left the room. "See you!" Kwest yelled the two last words after his friend before he shook his head. These two were totally crazy – about each other of course. He had never understood how they managed to stay sane during all these little and bigger fights they had.

* * *

Jude slowly regained consciousness. The first thing she noticed was that her head was pounding, hurting like hell. She tried to open her eyes, but the light was too bright so she closed them immediately, seriously considering to never open them ever again.

_What the fuck is wrong with me? I feel like I've been hit by a bus and ran over by several trucks afterwards. Maybe I'm even still on the road. Who knows?_

Jude nearly grinned at that last thought. At least she still had her sarcasm. She could totally picture Tommy making a stupid comment about her being fine as long as she could get all sarcastic about the situation. Tommy. Somehow her thoughts always ended with him. Just like she usually always ended up with him.

Jude blinked and tried again to slowly open her eyes. She quickly realized that it wasn't as bright as she had thought moments ago. Wherever she was, it could only about one or two dimmed lamps.

_Where am I? That's a damn good question._

Jude tried to look around through half closed eyes, but found that she couldn't see much since her view was somewhat blurred. And her head was still feeling like personal hell. She groaned, wondering how in hell she got herself into this situation in the first place. She could remember waking up this morning. Feeling shitty because of the two proposals. Then the conversation with Shay. She had hung up on him. The doorbell. Megan.

"Well well, who's finally waking up?" Megan's voice reached Jude in her blurred world.

"Megan?" Jude asked and only noticed after the word had left her mouth that her voice was untypical shaky. She moved her head into the direction she thought Megan's voice had come from. A ache ran through her head and caused her to groan audibly again, followed by a curse under her breath.

"Oh, poor thing. Don't worry you'll be like new in a few minutes. You have to believe me that I never wanted to do something like this. But you didn't leave me another choice. I don't want to chain you to this excuse of a couch, but you left me no other choice. You understand that, don't you?" Megan asked and suddenly Jude felt a hand ruffle through her hair. A shiver ran down her spine and she had to fight the urge to let out a small scream.

But Megan had told her the truth, a few moments later she had nearly a normal sight again. Now able to see her surroundings she quickly realized just where she was exactly too: in her own basement. She was kept as a prisoner in her own house.

_Apropos prisoner. Megan said chains. She didn't mean…? Oh she did. She fucking chained me to this stupid couch. I can't believe it. She's crazy. Totally crazy._

Jude froze when she had moved her left leg and had felt a chain around it. She didn't dare to turn her head and look at her former friend. She didn't know what to think or what to do. She only knew that she was scared to hell.

"What… What do you want? Why?" Jude whispered, tears watering up her eyes. She tried not to let them fall, but that was a difficult task to accomplish.

"Because you need me. Even though you might not see it. You're about to make a mistake." Megan explained patronizingly.

"What mistake?" Jude asked, honestly confused. The whole thing just didn't make any sense.

"Duh. Do you think I'm blind? I saw how Little Tommy Q proposed to you. And you kissed him! He's a mistake Jude. I thought you've learned that by now!" Megan said now sort of scolding Jude but in a loving manner, just like a mother would reprimand her beloved child.

Jude remained silent, unable to process everything that was going on. She couldn't believe that Megan, the person she had trusted once, was currently kidnapping her and had chained her in her own basement.

"You asked what I want from you? I want a song. I want a song in which you get over Tommy. I want you to make amazing music again, one with depths, not that stupid shit you produce with that wannabe rapper gone producer." Megan paused, leaving Jude and walking into her view, picking up a keyboard and positioning it in front of Jude. "I'm only trying to help you, so that your next album will be better than your last one."

"One song? Then you'll let me go?" Jude asked, the fear showing in her features as much as in her voice.

"Yeah, one song. One "I'm over Tommy and moving on" song. Or one "I let you go" song, whatever you need to finally forget that looser. That's all I'm asking for. Well technically I'm asking for two songs, because once you've dealt with Tommy, I want one to close the chapter that's called "Johnny". He's nearly as bad for you as Tommy was. You give me these two songs and you're free."

"Alright."

* * *

So that was it so far. Curious how it'll go from here? Because Jamie's not there this time since he's kinda left town.

Kathy ;)


	16. 16 A Whole Lot Of Baggage

Last Chapter: Visitors: 110, Reviews: 4

* * *

_**16. Messages and Songs and A Whole Lot of Baggage**_

Jude was strumming the guitar gently, trying out different tunes, searching for inspiration. The thing was that she couldn't really concentrate on her music right now. Not with the person, who had kidnapped her and was holding her prisoner in her own basement, standing right beside her. Jude was growing more and more frustrated with the situation. How was she supposed to write a song about her deepest feelings, about feelings which she hadn't even figured out herself yet when a crazed fan or whatever Megan was, was distracting her?

But Jude wasn't the only one who wasn't exactly happy with the way things were going. Megan was getting more impatient by minute and had started pacing, muttering stuff under her breath that Jude couldn't catch. And while doing so she had some sort of stapler machine in her heads, constantly clicking or whatever the sound it made when it was used was called. It was pretty scary, especially to Jude since she had no idea what exactly Megan was capable of.

Jude tried to blend out Megan and the whole situation and the thoughts one could get when one was being kidnapped by some lunatic. She contemplated for a moment with whom of the two guys in her life she should start and settled for Johnny. He was the "new" one and there was less baggage that came with thinking about him. It was still complicated to sort out what she felt for him, but it was nowhere near as complicated as thinking about Tommy.

She let her mind wander back to the day she had met him. How he had been all charming and how she had forgotten about her heartbreak for a few minutes, captivated by the casualness and the charm of the stranger. He reminded her of Shay in some ways, her first boyfriend. Both definitely had the looks and were famous - and well aware of that when she met them. They had noticed her, even flirted with her before they knew who she really was and she had instinctively liked both from the very beginning.

Well with Shay she had had some differences, but when she had first met him she had ran into something. She still remembered just too well, how she had ran over that thing and Shay and Tommy and just everybody had just been grinning at her, or rather laughing about her. But she had only seen Shay when she had looked back.

A soft smile appeared on Jude's face at that memory. No matter how things had ended with Shay on her 16th, he had been her first boyfriend and that was something she'd never forget. Luckily he now was her best friend, so she wasn't even supposed to hate him anymore and could remember these things without any bitter thoughts, she had truly moved past that whole affair. Thinking back to those times it felt like memories from another lifetime, so many things had changed.

With Johnny she felt free, reckless and save. When he took her to the fancy parties and introduced her to all the people she felt important and he knew how to make her feel like the only girl in the room. Though she had at first been reluctant to go to these parties; though she had felt like she didn't really belong in this glamorous world; though she used to hate these stuck-up people, it was still nice to feel like she was accepted by them and even sort of popular. To live the fancy life and all the advantages that came with it.

But there were always these two nights where he had showed up at her place, totally drunk. She couldn't forget those nights, no matter how hard she tried. She couldn't forget the fear when Johnny had come up to her. Or the stinging feeling of helplessness when he had slapped her hard across the face. Just because she had dared to tell him that he shouldn't get drunk again. How the question "why?" had never really left her. And how that constant wondering (if she had done something wrong to deserve his actions) had never really gone away. She had heard that it was the usual reaction victims of abusive boyfriends usually had. They blamed themselves and although she knew it wasn't her fault, deep inside she was still wondering.

The worst thing was that it was like she knew two different people. The Johnny she had fallen for and went out with on several dates was the total opposite from the drunken, mean and brutal Johnny she had gotten to know these two nights. She couldn't bring herself to end things with Johnny because of two nights. He had helped her get on with her life when Tommy had left and she had placed a lot of trust in him and her boyfriend Johnny hadn't done anything wrong. The drunk Johnny had.

_I have invented a new Jude with Johnny, a Jude that wasn't depending on Tom Quincy anymore. But is it still me?_ _Can I truly be that new me for the rest of my life? Or is it just a mask that will fall down eventually. Can I let Tommy go?_

Jude sighed frustrated. There she had tried to think about hers and Johnny's relationship and where had her thoughts ended up? Right, at Tommy-town. The topic she hadn't wanted to get into because it was too much for her right now.

"What's wrong? Why aren't you writing, Jude?" Megan asked and interrupted Jude's thoughts. She had actually managed to forget about the whole "I'm being hold as a prisoner in my own basement and I'm chained to a very uncomfortable couch"-thing.

"I kinda have problems with the inspiration. I don't know, maybe it's the vibe down here, all these walls and no windows." Jude replied sarcastically. She found that she didn't like the way Megan was saying her name at all. She silently wondered if Megan had always used this tone or if she just hadn't noticed it until now. But then again, afterwards one could always "see the signs".

Jude had just finished when Megan was suddenly standing like right in front of her, getting totally in Jude's face, their faces only inches apart. The stapler machine was once again caused to make many strange, creepy sounds. Suddenly Jude got scared again and remembered that maybe, **maybe** it wasn't such a bright idea to upset the crazy kidnapper.

"I thought I had made myself clear. I thought I had been as friendly as possible and had told you that you just left me no other choice; that I didn't want to have to do this, Jude. You could have just stuck with the plan. You could have just forgotten about that looser and everything would be fine. I'm doing this for you. This is all your fault, Jude." Megan told Jude in a sort of patronizing yet reasoning tone.

"You've made yourself perfectly clear, Megan. I'm sorry that I'm so... so uncooperative. Thanks for sticking with me." Jude said, trying hard to keep a straight face and a serious voice. She didn't know if Megan would catch on the sarcasm, but she frankly didn't care. She was way too pissed off right now. So she prepared herself for something dramatic, like a slap or whatever, but was surprised when nothing came.

"Good to see that you've finally got it. I'm gonna get some water from upstairs. Don't you dare to even try to escape. Don't make me hurt you, Jude." Megan said and walked away.

Jude sighed and decided to try and write something down. It was the only thing she could really do with that crazy bitch around anyways. She thought about Johnny and about his proposal.

_Pushing Tommy aside, do I want to say yes? Do I love him? Can I picture him and me in the future as wife and husband?_

The answer was surprising easy to find. The thing she loved the most about their relationship was the safety. She didn't have to deal with Tommy or with her love life because she had been with Johnny. And if he hadn't proposed she would have stayed with him. But the way things were now, she couldn't honestly tell him she loved him anymore. She couldn't pretend any longer.

_**Oh the truth hurts **_

_**A lie is worse **_

_**I can't like it anymore **_

_**And I love you a little less than before**_

She strummed a few chords and then quickly wrote them down.

* * *

At the same time in front of a red traffic light was Tom Quincy, sitting in his viper, impatiently waiting for the light to turn green. While waiting he threw glances at his cell that laid next to him, silently hoping that Jude would call him. He just wanted to hear her voice, he needed to hear her voice.

And he wanted to explain, explain that he had really meant it, that he still loved her and always would. He wanted her to know that she could take her time with her answer but that he couldn't take it if she tried to avoid him any longer, because he loved her and needed her in his life.

Tommy might have made mistakes, but he knew that Jude would most likely not be up to seeing or talking to him. So he would have to persuade her otherwise somehow. He would have to make her listen. First of all, he'd have to get past the front door though, which would be quite a task itself, knowing how stubborn Jude could be.

_She might not even be at home. She probably saw me or Johnny coming. But then again, it's early, at least for Jude, and so she might even still be in bed. She's always one to rather sleep through the day than face emotional problems like this. Either it's sleeping or writing a song._

Tommy smiled wearily, though he loved Jude's way to deal with her feelings (in songs), he knew that if she was writing a song right now, she'd probably not be at home but somewhere out, far away from all her problems and any distractions.

The traffic light turned green –finally- and Tommy sped away, determined to find his girl.

* * *

"Finally, it took you long enough." Megan said half annoyed half ecstatic that Jude had finally started making music, when she came down the stairs and heard Jude strum a few tunes on her guitar while humming to it. Jude didn't stop or bother to look up, the only thing Megan would have seen was hate and indignation in her eyes and upsetting Megan could end badly- as good and tempting as it might sound.

"Let me hear what you got so far." Megan demanded, now hovering behind Jude, slightly leaning in to see the notebook over Jude's shoulder.

"Of course, whatever you say." Jude said before she could think about it, a dark note of sarcasm in her voice. She didn't do well with being all obedient, she noticed. She had always been more the rebel type of girl. But Megan didn't pick up on the sarcasm or just ignored it, either way, she just seemed to wait for Jude to start singing.

_**Let me hold you  
**__**For the last time  
It's the last chance to feel again  
But you broke me  
Now I can't feel anything**_

_**When I love you  
I**__**t's so untrue  
I can't even convince myself  
When I'm speaking  
It's the voice of someone else**_

_**Oh it tears me up  
I tried to hold on but it hurts too much  
I tried to forgive but it's not enough  
To make it all okay**_

_**You can't play on broken strings  
You can't feel anything  
That your heart don't want to feel  
I can't tell you something that ain't real**_

_**Oh the truth hurts  
A lie's worse  
I can't like it anymore  
And I love you a little less than before**_

_**Oh what are we doing?  
We are turning into dust  
Playing house in the ruins of us**_

_**Running back through the fire  
When there's nothing left to save  
It's like chasing the very last train  
When it's too late**_

_**Oh it tears me up  
I tried to hold on but it hurts too much  
I tried to forgive but its not enough  
To make it all okay**_

_**You can't play on broken strings  
You can't feel anything  
That your heart don't want to feel  
I can't tell you something that ain't real**_

That's all I've got so far with the lyrics, I'm currently working on the chords. I think I've got the chorus nearly right." Jude explained curtly, unwilling to share anything with her former friend.

"So this about Johnny, huh?" Megan asked after a few seconds of silence. Jude turned her head to see Megan stare into space, lost in her own crazy thoughts.

"Yeah." Jude just said shortly, her gaze dropped to a paper that Megan held loosely at her side. In her other hand she held the bottle of water she must have brought downstairs from the kitchen.

"I like it." Megan finally decided. "Good work. Now, I'd suggest you start with Tommy. We can finish this song later, it's nearly done anyways." She finished dismissively.

Jude was about to protest, but Megan send her a look of warning with a strange gleam in her eyes, that told Jude it would be best to shut up. Never argue with a crazy person, especially not if said person has chained you to a couch.

"But first, you'll write something down for me." Megan added and handed Jude the piece of paper.

"Write this, and don't you dare to change a word of it! Hey, I'm gone for a few days. Seriously in need of some alone time here. Don't try to find me." Megan dictated, an evil smile on her face. Jude wrote it down slowly, desperately trying to think of a way to use this paper to get help, but first she didn't knew for whom the message was meant and secondly, she had no idea how she was supposed to do that without Megan noticing.

"Now sign it. And no stupid doodles or whatever." Megan warned her, after checking if Jude had done everything exactly as told.

"And for whom is this clever message?" Jude asked while signing with 'Jude Harrison', she silently hoped, that whoever would read the message would maybe stumble over her signing with her full name. After all, Jude was known to be lazy and signing with more than Jude didn't really seem to make much sense anyways.

"For whoever is going to come here and look for you. If they find this message in the kitchen, I doubt they'll look for you in the basement." Megan explained proudly and then quickly snitched the message from Jude, before the latter could react in any way.

"I'll put this upstairs. I'd suggest you start writing, Jude." With that she was gone and heading up the stairs, leaving a stunned and angry Jude behind. She had been hoping that someone would come and search for her tomorrow or so, since people would expect her to need some time alone, but not days. But with this message lying around upstairs, the chances of rescue weren't good.

* * *

Tommy walked up to the Harrison's house, always feeling a little bit bad about the fact that Jude had to live all alone in the big house. But then again, he was always worried about Jude and he knew, that if he ever mentioned to her how dangerous things could get if she lived all alone, she'd only tell him to mind his own business and that she could take care of herself just fine.

He rang the doorbell a few times and waited. And waited. Waited. Rang again. Waited.

Quickly growing impatient and worried now he tried the door and found it locked. That was strange, he knew Jude well enough to know that she never locked the door. He had told her to be more careful about it, but she had always just laughed at him and said something along the lines of: "And who in hell would try and steal anything of mine, Quincy?"

He rounded the house, glancing through the windows only to find an empty living room and an empty kitchen. When he came to the back door, he finally had luck, it wasn't locked. He let out a sigh of relief and entered the house.

"Jude? Are you home?" He called into the silence while making his way into the living room, figuring that if she was upstairs and getting ready to see someone, she would prefer it if he waited downstairs in the living room or in the kitchen.

* * *

The sound of the bell made the two girls in the basement freeze – for two entirely different reasons.

Megan was becoming nervous and a little bit scared, after all who'd help Jude through this phase if she couldn't?

Jude felt hope arise in her, against all odds like for example the letter lying on the counter in the kitchen. Someone was coming to see after her, someone who might notice something wasn't write, anything really, she wasn't even picky anymore. And if he or she just found a stack of old worn underwear and decided to put it down in the basements to where the washing machine was. She didn't give a damn about the why and how, just as long as she'd get out of the basement and far, far away from Megan.

When for a few seconds nothing happened Jude was suddenly tempted to call for help, before who ever the visitor was turned around and left again. But then her eyes met Megan's and the death glare told her to better not even try.

The next seconds were pure torture to Jude, not knowing who was standing up there in front of the door, if it was Shay or just the mail man. Not knowing if said person would just walk away again and not think anything of her absence or if the person knew her well enough to go and search for her, to not just walk away.

The bell rang again.

_Well at least he's not gone yet. Keep cool Jude, nothing's over yet. Yet, there I said it. No one will come down here and safe me from that crazy bitch. She'll either keep me in here for ever or kidnap me and take me somewhere else. Seriously, not even she can be so mental to think that I'd just let her get away with this once she lets me go. Damn it, why do I always have such bad luck? A few months ago she helped me escape the reporters and now she's keeping me in my basement. Leave it to me to find the crazy ones._

"Well hopefully whoever that is will get the hint and leave now." Megan said threateningly after a few minutes had passed without any more noises from upstairs.

"Yeah. Hopefully." Jude echoed numbly, she couldn't believe that help had been so near. Someone had come and looked for her and she hadn't been able to make contact. She felt even more hopeless than minutes before.

_Shit, why don't I have roommates or family or just anything at all, really. Maybe I should have listened to Sades and Tommy, they told me for ages to go and get a flat or at least to stop __living in this big house all alone. Not that a flat would have kept Megan from going all bonkers on me, but roommates might have made it way more difficult for her._

"Stop staring into space and get back to work. Then soon enough you can go to the studio again and record these songs and bring out another amazing album. You'll see just how happy you can be without men at your side who always try to mess things up for you."

Jude clenched and unclenched her teeth several times, not sure how much longer she'd be able to keep herself from attacking Megan. As if it wasn't bad enough to be chained to a couch, Megan kept making comments about just how good this would be for Jude and how messed up her life was and what not else. It was slowly driving Jude crazy.

_Focus Jude, focus. She has a weapon and no chain around her ankle, attacking her would be a very very stupid idea. Plus she's mental so there's no way to know what she'd do. _

Jude shook her head ever so slightly and started concentrating on the lyrics in front of her again, hoping to escape from reality when she lost herself in her music.

_**I've been searching deep down in my soul  
Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old  
Feels like I'm starting all over again  
The last three years were just pretend and I say**_

_**Goodbye to you  
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew  
You were the one I love  
The one thing that I tried to hold on to**_

…

_**Of all the things I believe in  
I just want to get it over with  
tears from behind my eyes  
but I do not cry**_

…

_**I still get lost in your eyes  
And it seems like I can't live a day without you  
Closing my eyes till you chase my thoughts away  
To a place where I am … by the light, but it's not right**_

_**It hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time  
I want what's yours and I want what's mine  
I want you but I'm not giving in this time**_

_**You're my shooting star**_

_**(the "…" means that she reckons that there still is something missing)**_

Jude crunched up her face starring at the last line. She couldn't yet place it anywhere, not sure whether to put it to the chorus or a verse. Hell she hadn't even figured out all the verses yet and the chorus was still missing at least a word, but she somehow just knew that "You're my shooting star" had to be in this song. She just had no idea how.

"Jude!" A damped call rang through the basement, once again causing everyone in there to freeze. Jude's heartbeat sped up. She knew this voice like no other. Of course he'd come to see her, of course he'd be the one to rescue her. Joy and relief and a thousand other emotions flooded through Jude, conjuring a truly happy smile on Jude's face. Until her eyes met Megan's and suddenly she was afraid for Tommy.

Before Jude could manage to call or give another sound at all, Megan was over at her side and had a gag well placed over Jude's mouth, making it impossible for the helpless victim to speak. She could only watch with widened eyes how Megan began to slowly climb upstairs, barely making any noise at all.

_Please Tommy, be gone when she gets upstairs. Please don't let her get you._

_

* * *

_Yeah, so Jude's still not free, sorry bout that. But this chapter nearly has 4000 words, so it's long enough if you ask me :) And I know the chapter's title is crap, but I'm too tired to be creative right now. Since school's ended today for my very last summer holidays, I'll try and update before next monday, since then I'll be leaving for France for 11 days without my pc, yay! :) You would have gotten this update much earlier, if I hadn't been ill the better of the last two months. I'm still recovering and I really really hope that I don't get ill again in France, because then I'd seriously be tempted to jump of a cliff or something. Up to now I spend nearly every sunny day this summer (except yesterday and today) ill and in bed. I'm sooo sick of that. Anyways, nuff ranting for now ;)

Keep the reviews coming, spread the love ;) xD

xoxo


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